Getting together is common among humans and animals. The needs and circumstances among humans for getting together varied among families, peers, tribes, and nations. The needs could be symbiotic relationship; it could be for business, celebrations, religion and so on. Getting together helps in developing relationships, which promote good social health. Good social health means having
satisfying relationships with a variety of people, such as your family, peers, teachers, neighbours, etc
For humans, the first getting together is with other family members. The family could be a single-parent family, a nuclear family, an extended family or a blended family—where two separate families are combined when two single parents remarry. Most family members get together when there is a sad incident such as an accident, severe illness, death and during festive occasions such as religious feasts and traditional festivals. An important bond is formed between the children and parent(s) and between other members of the family. This bond affects their future relationships. Families provide the first learning experiences on love, support, trust, sharing, and companionship. Family relationships help form your self-concept and influence your mental and social health.
Within the family circle, getting together is very important. It helps the members to grow to maturity. Families provide for such basic physical needs as food, clothing, and shelter. Families also help members during illness, protect them from injury, and provide security. A family helps meet many emotional needs of its members. In these respects, it can provide caring relationships that help family members
feel loved and accepted.
acceptance help children develop a basic sense of trust towards their parents and the world around them. Families provide other emotional support, such as praise and encouragement. People develop self-confidence when their efforts and achievements are recognized and when they are encouraged to meet new challenges. Families help members develop ideas about what is important and what is not important. People can use these ideas as guidelines, or values for behavior. Members learn values, such as the sense of right and wrong from families’ attitudes and behaviors. The close bond that develops between family members can help them learn about the give-and-take of getting together. They learn ways to communicate warmth, caring, and support. They also learn ways to handle the conflict that can result from feelings of jealousy and competition.
We are bombarded with images of happy families enjoying each other; the familiar voices, the familiar sights of childhood experiences, meeting other people who look like you, the muffled sounds of childhood experiences. These stir up pleasant feelings in most of us, as we recall what it was like growing up. Some people because of the memories that they bring dread the family times of getting together. If a family member was abusive towards you, then a family time may stir up feelings associated with the abuse.
If you are going to get together at a place that holds unpleasant memories, take a piece of your current home with you. A book you love, a small decoration like a stuffed animal in your home, some music you love can be powerful reminders that you are just visiting, your home is elsewhere and you will soon return. Problems and misunderstandings occur when people get together. Lack of privacy is a common problem among families. Sometimes family members are not aware of each other’s need for privacy. Tension can occur when there are conflicting needs. Also, the desire for greater independence is a common need, especially among teenagers. Sometimes one’s personal values conflict with those of others within
the family and among one’s peers. Pressure from others to act in a certain way can interfere with becoming more independent.
These problems can be solved in a number of ways. First, identify the problem. Discuss the problem with the people concerned. In discussing the problem, be direct and specific, avoiding generalizing. For example, suppose your sister has not done her share of chores, you should not say, “You never do what you are supposed to do.” Simply say, “You have not washed the dishes and they need washing”. In discussing problems, avoid being sarcastic or blaming the other person. Instead of complaining, suggest possible solutions. If both of you cannot agree on a solution, each person might come to a compromise and agree to give up part of what he originally wanted.
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© 2020 Tezeh Collins