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Growth and Fixed Mindset

Updated on June 13, 2016

The one thing about myself that I would most like to change is how I react to stressful situations. Like when a big paper is due or if a big test is coming up. My mind gets fixed in a certain mindset of “You can’t do this or you’re incapable of finishing that,” that is my way of dealing with an overly stressful situation. What I should instead use a growth mindset and remind myself of all the reason I have for finishing or for moving forward. Like by me succeeded in my college will show them that it is a good thing to pursue higher education. That it can lead to a more fulfilling job.

My mom was never really one to give positive praise of any kind to either of her children and that may be the reason behind why I push my own children so hard to be the best they can be. I am always telling them that I am proud of them and that the sky is the limit for their success. I make sure that they understand that nothing is impossible with the right education and motivation to succeed.

My oldest daughter, for example, wants to be a singer when she grows up and I told her that I would back her in any way I so she can succeed. However, I also mentioned to her that having a good education would make it where if she ever changed her mind or decided that singing wasn’t for her then she could pursue other options with a good education.

I don’t know if I have ever intentionally used how I was feeling as a way of not doing something, but I do know that when I am depressed I tend to not want to do things that I know I am supposed to do. If I am upset I tend to close myself off from those around me and not really want to be around anyone. However, if I was to stop about what all I have accomplished and how far I have come to get to where I am today I would probably be a little more appreciative. But sometimes when I am feeling low it is hard to think about the good things in my life.

Honestly, I do not know of any time that I have intentionally tried to stop myself from being the best that I can be. However, back when I was married to my ex-husband he had a bad habit of telling me that I was worthless. That I would never amount to anything, and could never be anything other than what I was at that specific time. I was able to prove him and a lot of other people that they were wrong when I decided to go back to school and finish the degree that I had started before I got married. Now here I am pushing forward slowly each day to succeed my ultimate goal of being the best that I can possibly be. Also, I keep going because I know that in the end I will be able to have my dream job.

I know that as long as I try my best and push myself to succeed than in the end I will be the best that I possibly can be.


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