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Guest blog by an angry caveman
I want my crudely formed version of money back
Dear Sir: I am writing with regards to a product I purchased from the appliance store in your downtown location. The model in question is the Triceratops 100, your newest garbage disposal. It is not that I find fault with the product; on the contrary, it grinds T-rex eggshells, etc., quite well. My problem, however, is the several snide comments your product has been heard to utter. Many times as I am leaving the kitchen after using the disposal, I can hear it saying, “It’s a living,” or some such comment. This however, is one of the milder things I have heard. The garbage disposal seems to have gotten more brazen lately. A few times it has made reference to my weight; other times it has made certain allegations about my poor dear mother, her intelligence, and her dating life. I realize that once a product leaves your company it is hard for you to be responsible for its attitude and what comes out of its mouth. However, as a disgruntled customer I would encourage your company to consider sensitivity training for your products. In the meantime, I am returning the product to your store. As a side note, I would like to mention that the Wooly Mammoth shower head I purchased years ago from your company is doing quite well. I know my friends and neighbors have had issues showering with a huge furry animal watching them the whole time, but I really don’t mind. In fact, I rather enjoy it.