ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Books, Literature, and Writing»
  • Commercial & Creative Writing»
  • Creative Writing»
  • Humor Writing

Guest instructions to the dog and cat sitter

Updated on February 26, 2012

It is so hard to find a good petsitter....

Muffy, Tuffy, and Puffy are the black cats that are identical to each other. Tuffy gets 1/3 of the small white pill every 8 hours. Make sure Tuffy is the one who gets it! Muffy and Puffy throw up all over the place if they get any of it. (Cat vomit cleaner is under the kitchen sink.)

Muffy gets 1/8 of the other white pill every 12 hours. Tuffy will eat her pill crushed up in Feline Feast cat food. Muffy gets her pill crushed up in Meow Meal food. Tuffy will not eat Meow Meal and Muffy will not eat Feline Feast! Make sure Tuffy and Puffy do not get a hold of Muffy’s pill—you will regret it if she does! (Cat poop cleaner is under the bathroom sink.)

Now, on to the dogs. I hope you don’t have to get 8 hours of sleep a night!

Baxter (the Beagle) needs to go out at, approximately, 11 p.m., 1 a.m., 2:20 a.m., 4 a.m., and 6 a.m. If I were you I would hurry up and let him outside (dog poop cleaner is in the laundry room.)

Peanut (the bigger Chihuahua) has been waking up at 3 a.m. lately and howling very loudly. I don’t know why. Don’t let it scare you. She’ll stop after 45 minutes or so.

Molly (the smaller Chihuahua) will only eat freshly killed and baked chicken, and you have to cut it up into small pieces and feed it to her. It takes about 2 hours for her to eat—but don’t try to cut corners and make the pieces too big. If they are too big, she will let you know eventually (dog vomit cleaner is in the garage.)

Now, about my pet piranha……


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    No comments yet.