Healing and Longing Words
Why didn’t you come visit me baby?
There wouldn’t be anyone else but us.
I was waiting
for a decade or so
I was starving for you, us
For the love thought to be
The notion was all I had to hang onto
Blinded, made a fool out of my heart
Wanting us to work so desperately
I could barley breath, speak be still
Waiting for you, sitting, waiting, wondering
maybe I should get up off my fearful ass
to come to you.
Rejection enters hastily; my romantic notion leaves even faster.
I have the ambition of a sloth
stretched out, so content.
To even look at myself seems lost
If I could smile
Who would that be?
Definitely not the girl in front of my eyes
Staring back with a cold, abandoned gaze.
Craving death to wisp me away
seems not to be fast enough
here I stand, blinking painfully
waiting to take that one step in a direction,
of truth and unknown
towards the person that lingers beneath the surface
waiting to break free
stretched out, so content
I crave a cigarette
and I don’t even smoke
I thought if I needed one
I’d miss thinking of you.