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Honest Company Slogans

Updated on June 8, 2012

A company slogan is designed to give a customer a reason to buy a product. As millions are spent, companies carefully choose how to market their product to the correct demographic. We remember these slogans and they affect how we view a company.

But imagine if companies were honest with us. Sure sales would more than likely plummet, but it would be refreshing to hear them say what we all (or most of us) think. Here are a few examples:

But divorce is easy!!!
But divorce is easy!!!

Facebook – Because everyone needs to know when you poop!

Verizon – Treating first-time customers the best!

Twitter – Quick, type something you'll regret!

Pepsi – When they don’t have Coke, choose Pepsi!

Home Depot - You have no idea what you're doing!

BP – Our Bad.

McDonald’s – We have salads, but that's not why you're here!

WalMart – You really don’t have a choice anymore…

BestBuy – Our Know it all employees are sure to make you feel foolish!

MTv - Music Free!

Snuggie - It's not like you have a date tonight.

Red Bull - Because cocaine is illegal!

Google – When you need to look up how to buy chloroform.

Visa – Because you would not buy this stuff with cash.

FedEx – Are you really going to trust the post office?

Apple – If we made this in America just imagine how much it would cost!

Viagra – It happens to almost everybody..

Marlboro - You don't care and neither do we.

Tylenol - No recalls since 2010!

Gatorade – 23 grams of sugar will help you win!

Charmin – Better than corn cobs.

Nike – Because $149 shoes are totally reasonable.

Bing – Like Google, but worse.

Aol – Welcome....Hello?

Hubpages – Because no one visits your blog.

Squidoo - Like Hubpages, but way more confusing!

Chevorlet – Building punch lines. One Volt at a time.

MySpace - Is anybody out there?

Netflix - Great for obscure documentaries!

Aquafina – Better than Tap!

Comcast - Please Hold.

Funyuns - Great with Mountain Dew and weed!

Fox News - One sided news you can trust.

MSNBC - Somebody's watching right?

Under Armour – If you don’t work out this will not look good on you.

Natural Light – When you're having more than six.


These slogans would in all likelyhood bring sales to a grinding halt and do serious harm to our fragile economy, so we should probably stick to I'm loving it and just do it. We know the truth but don't want to hear it, and a great slogan will resonate with the targeted customer and increase sales. But if for some reason or another companies decide to take the honest approach I'm ready, willing, inexpensive, and available!


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    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 4 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks C.V. Glad you enjoyed!

    • C.V.Rajan profile image

      Disillusioned 4 years ago from Kerala, India

      Hey! You have a nice sense of humor!

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Glad you enjoyed it Jordan, Thanks!

    • Jordanwalker39 profile image

      Jordanwalker39 5 years ago from GA

      Another great hub!! So honest. Thank you.

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Crystal!

    • Crystal Tatum profile image

      Crystal Tatum 5 years ago from Georgia

      Hilarious! Voted up.

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Glad you enjoyed it! Thanks!

    • Mr Archer profile image

      Mr Archer 5 years ago from Missouri

      I love how your mind works! I was reading these and sitting at my desk at work laughing so hard I was afraid someone outside the building was going to hear me! I loved the Pepsi slogan, and the Tylenol ones, hell I loved them ALL! Great job AGAIN!

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      I like your Home Depot slogan Claudia! Thanks!

      Thanks for reading rahul, if only right?

    • rahul0324 profile image

      Jessee R 5 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      This was hilarious! Hahaha! If only all of them would be honest... I would opt for hubpages though!!

      Funny hub really..

    • Claudia Tello profile image

      Claudia Tello 5 years ago from Mexico

      I wouldn´t go to McDonalds or have a Pepsi/Coke no matter how hard they try to convince me with their slogans.

      Your alternative Malboro and FedEx slogans are right on! That´s exactly what I think.

      I would add to Home Depot: "Come lose your mind before we get it right".

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Ruchira, I appreciate it!

    • Ruchira profile image

      Ruchira 5 years ago from United States

      haha...this is such a hilarious hub so creative and so true.

      loved it. voted up and sharing it across

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks efficient admin, glad you liked it!

    • Efficient Admin profile image

      Efficient Admin 5 years ago from Charlotte, NC

      Way too funny! I love the Hubpages the best. Still giggling over that one.

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      I like it Marlo, Thanks!

    • MarloByDesign profile image

      MarloByDesign 5 years ago from United States

      LOL - "Marlboro - You don't care and neither do we." So true. How about "Addicting, yet smooth cancer sticks!"

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Yes but here they would have to pay $18/hr to have them built!

      Yes, it's genius what they can come up with tillsontitan! Thanks for reeading and voting!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 5 years ago from New York

      Honesty in advertising? Who would ever! I laughed my way through your slogans but still thought how easily we are sometimes taken in. Voted up, funny and interesting.

    • JessMcCray profile image

      JessMcCray 5 years ago from NYC

      About the iphone4 I have it and it's horrible, and I agree about how sad it is that it's assembled by underpaid overworked workers in china.

      I would personally love to boycott things made there but that's everything here

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Good point Headfull, thanks!

      Thanks Jess!

    • JessMcCray profile image

      JessMcCray 5 years ago from NYC

      That was so funny and true! I'm sharing this

    • profile image

      Headfullofsound 5 years ago

      Yeah, remember that Bullshit a couple of years ago when the iPhone 4 came out, how they were so proud to say it was "made in America". Um, no, Steve, it was "designed in America", but assembled in China by scores of underpaid women and minors. But therein lies the dilemma - they're just glad to HAVE a job... so sad!

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Thanks Spartucus, glad you enjoyed it!

      At least in my case Mel, Thanks!

      Thanks billybuc, I appreciate it!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 5 years ago from Olympia, WA

      hahahahahahaha! Very, very funny! I loved this completely and I needed a laugh. Perfect timing coming upon this wonderful hub!

    • MelChi profile image

      Melanie Chisnall 5 years ago from Cape Town, South Africa

      Haha! I love the comment about HubPages - "Because no one visits your blog"! Voted funny and Up!

    • spartucusjones profile image

      CJ Baker 5 years ago from Parts Unknown

      Honesty in advertisement, I love it! Very amusing, I'm still chuckling.

    • weestro profile image

      Pete Fanning 5 years ago from Virginia

      Sounds like a deal unnamed, Thanks!

      I agree, honesty in politics could not be handled jim! Thanks for reading and commenting!

    • jimagain profile image

      jimagain 5 years ago from Hattiesburg, Mississippi

      Hilarious! Truth serum for adertisers? What next? Politicians?!! When will the madness stop? Come on, man. Don't you see youre ripping assunder the carefully woven tapestry of lies that holds our world together... ripped apart at the very seams!! and now all I can say is, "I'm loving it!"

      Too long consumers have been 'whiffing the airplane glue' of hype and hoopla; we may not be able to come back down to reality. I feel as if someone just ripped those rose-colored glasses from my face. I can seeee!!!!!

      Seriously, this should be mandatory reading for consumers! You hit the nail on the head with the slogans.

    • UnnamedHarald profile image

      David Hunt 5 years ago from Cedar Rapids, Iowa

      Great ideas! If only, right? You should rewrite their slogans and I'll rewrite all their mission, vision and whatever statements (saving millions of wasted dollars and thousands of overhead hours) by combining all of them into one: "We'll do anything for a buck". Voted up and funny.