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How To Tell If Your Neighbor Is Crazy
Most of us have had our run-ins with a few crazy members of society. But what happens when these “crazies” live next door. I have compiled a list of obvious signs that your neighbor has gone off the deep end. How do you tell if your neighbor is crazy?
1. Your neighbor has “crazy eyes”. He either has shifty eyes, or he just stares at you wide eyed and expressionless.
2. Your neighbor answers the door in his boxers with a beer can in one hand and a remote control in the other.
3. Your neighbor has crazy animals. They usually have cute names like “Fluffy” or “Scooter“, but take cautions, these animals have been schooled in crazy.
4.Your neighbor owns 5 or more cats, and call them his/her “best friends“. You may have a potential animal hoarder on your hands.
5. Your neighbor stands outside their house and talks on the phone so loudly, you can hear every word of their conversation from your living room.
6. When visiting, your neighbor won’t leave for five hours even though you’ve given every social cue, that they’ve worn out their welcome.
7. Your neighbor wears little to no clothes in public. This is very disturbing to say the least.
8. Your neighbor talks to much, mostly nonsensical babble. You nod patiently, but you have no idea what they’ve just said.
9. Your neighbor doesn’t talk enough. When you try to start up a conversation they stare at you blankly like they’re stoned. This is a good time to politely back away.
10.The police are at your neighbors house at least twice a month. You’ve even had to call the police on them.
11. Your neighbor plays their music extremely loud. But its not your typical party music. Its usually Kenny Rogers or The Sound of Music soundtrack.
12. Your neighbor starts arguments with you, usually about something stupid, like “We don’t like the flowers you’ve just planted, the colors clash with our patio”.
13. Your neighbors yell at each other in the front yard.
14. Your neighbor wears socks with sandals, Enough said.
15. Your neighbor never returns borrowed lawn equipment, and when you ask them aboutit they claim you gave it to them.
16. When talking your neighbor constantly invades your personal space. When you try to back away they move even closer.
17. Your neighbor has a habit of giving “too much information”. they want to tell you every detail of their visit to the proctologist.
18. Your neighbor seems to know everything about everyone else on the block. Its not normal gossip. Its borderline stalker information.
19. Your neighbor constantly takes your mail as an excuse to talk to you.
20. Your neighbor is a member of the NRA, and owns several guns.
If your neighbor is displaying 1 or all of these signs, you might want to think about moving. Or just avoid them as much as possible. This list is just for fun, if you find yourself meeting a few of these criteria, don’t worry there are lots of crazies out there just like you.