ArtsAutosBooksBusinessEducationEntertainmentFamilyFashionFoodGamesGenderHealthHolidaysHomeHubPagesPersonal FinancePetsPoliticsReligionSportsTechnologyTravel
  • »
  • Books, Literature, and Writing»
  • Commercial & Creative Writing»
  • Creative Writing»
  • Humor Writing

Humor Stop 2

Updated on June 9, 2011
The Desert
The Desert

Crossing the Desert

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman all applied for the same job with National Geographic.

The interviewer asked “If you had to walk across a desert and could only carry one thing, what would it be?”

The Englishman said he would carry a bottle of water.

The interviewer asked “why?’

The Englishman replied, “It will be hot and I’ll get thirsty, then I can drink some water”

The Scotsman said he would carry a bottle of Whiskey.

The interviewer asked “why?’

The Scotsman replied, “It will be hot and tiring, I will get depressed, I can drink some Whiskey and lift my spirits”

The Irishman said he would carry a car door.

The interviewer asked “why”

The Irishman replied, “If it gets too hot, I can open the window and get some breeze”.

Rolls Royce
Rolls Royce

Heavenly Transport

Three men went to heaven.

At the pearly gates St. Peter told them he would ask them all a question and depending on both the answer and the truth of the answer, their fate would be decided.

St.Peter said the question is “Were you unfaithful to your wife?”

The first man said, yes he was, he was always looking at the women and was often unfaithful.

St.Peter looked in his book and said, “Yes, that would seem to be true but apart from that you were good. You can have a VW Bug to drive around heaven”.

The second man said he had been unfaithful to his wife only once and had told her about it immediately.

St.Peter checked his book and agreeing gave the man a Lexus to drive around heaven.

The third man said he had always been faithful to his wife, he went to Church regularly and gave to charity generously.

St.Peter agreed and gave the man a Rolls Royce.

After a few weeks, the first two men went into a bar together and saw the third man, sitting alone and crying over his beer.

They asked him what could possibly be wrong. It was good in heaven and he had a Rolls Royce to drive about.

The man replied, “I just saw my wife on a skateboard”.


    0 of 8192 characters used
    Post Comment

    • Denise Handlon profile image

      Denise Handlon 6 years ago from North Carolina

      Thanks for the chuckles. Those are the kind of jokes my mother loved to tell. :)

    • aguasilver profile image

      John Harper 6 years ago from Malaga, Spain

      Ahhh, the old ones are the best!



    • profile image

      Fiddleman 6 years ago

      Thanks for the smiles.