I Am Trying To Be
Taking stock of myself recently it occurred to me.I am not good enough for you.
Though I try to be.
I do not tell you “ I love you” as often as I should.
I do not hold your hand when I could.
I look back and see opportunities missed.
Hugs not hugged, kisses not kissed.
No, I am not good enough for you, but I am trying to be.
As I look inside myself for these words the tears fall.
As my mistakes that caused you pain crash through my mind and soul one and all.
I am saddened by the mistakes made early in my life.
Now long gone, but still causing strife.
Sometimes I am ashamed that I that I took you for my wife.
Not because of any fault found in you. But the pain you went through for loving me.
I could never be good enough for you. But I will always try to be.
It is your love that tortures and uplifts me at the same time.
I can not live without it, but taking sometimes feels like a crime.
I am the thief that comes in the night. Taking from you that to which I have no right.
You are the gracious benefactor that beckons me to your light.
My darling can you not see?
I am not good enough for you. But I am trying to be.
I never meant to hurt you. I know I have many times.
I know that I can not heal those wounds with these rhymes.
What I can and will do is be by your side for as long as you will have me.
I am not good enough for you, perhaps I never will be.
For as long as you allow it. I will, I must, continue to try to be.