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I Loved Her Enough!

Updated on August 1, 2020
Samip Katwal profile image

Samip, Where are you?Yes, Momma coming! What were you busy with? I was reading “I loved her enough to let her go!” By Dr. Samip

So days passed by, and we had grown pretty close to each other, we shared every little things. Every little things mattered to us. I felt rejuvenated every time I talked to her. So 24/7 I had that feeling. We started talking even in college but having a conversation direct looked little awkward. We signalled each other and then beamed with immense pleasure.

I moved hither and thither but in group, we knew every little secrets of each other but somehow I managed keeping this secret from my peer group who would at times feel themselves as Sherlock Holmes! They would interrogate me on why I smiled for no reason and every time I survived these 9/10 Sherlock Holmes at a time.

As always she would be with her group in ground and Oh! I would be there already ready for a friendly football kick off. At times I would be showing skills and every time I felt she was just looking at me. And then when I turned around to see her, she would be busy with her group.

That Ting! Ting! Which I waited fervently was my biggest enemy! But we all are servants of time, so I couldn’t go against time. Maybe she knew it or was it just what I thought, she would lean back slightly and give me a smile. The next second, I would be frolicking around.

That was kind of daily routine for us. But the time had come for me to leave college soon. I wasn’t happy at all. But she kept me cheering up! She promised to be there always and I promised to be there for her like a shadow!

It was my Chemistry Practical. I had a day shift examination. But I forgot to let her know of that. I met my friends from morning shift, they let me know of how she was looking hither and thither for me! I didn’t regret that then, I was on cloud nine. I was there with my friends where she sat usually, she did come with her friend, But I didn’t call her, I wanted her to notice me. She did turn back and was saying something but I had no idea what she was talking about! Maybe we were habituated of signalling each other. So I forgot what real conversation actually looked like. She then bid me good luck while her friend constantly trying to move her ahead forcefully, I just smiled.

Days passed by and it was time for my boards. Maybe God knew I used my gadget more than necessary, I was helping her with her practical, I got my mobile broken. It just fell off my shorts. I was crestfallen! I couldn’t ask for a new one, I had my boards on way. But even God couldn’t stop me, I found ways of texting her. It was IPL time so I would be watching games but then when my parents locked their doors , would connect internet on TV and then open Face Book. Uff! It took 10 minutes to type a single message. I would at times sneak to ensure I don’t get caught.

My parents were leaving for Manakamana next day but I avoided the visit. I had an excuse already ready. I have to prepare hard for my boards, so I can’t join you guys. I will go some other day. It was really hard convincing them but no things come to you easily. You have to work for it. I had a desktop which I used at times but that day I was all alone. So I made full use of that. But She had Internet problems and that didn’t turn out that well. I took my mom’s mobile often and texted her and then would immediately logout.

Days passed by the same way. I found an old gadget not in use. I had to help her with her exams. So not to get caught, I would go washroom and then ask her questions on various topics. She would answer them, I would correct her mistakes.

I had to leave for my works to village. I was going there for 2nd time in my entire life. I was excited about it but I had to find ways to text her with dad sitting around, I felt uneasy. And She had her boards, It was hard for me to help her, there was rarely network available but somehow I helped her with her essays, confusions she had till 1 in the evening and woke up early at 5 to see if she had some other confusions and would bid her good luck. She did have a confusion and I tried my best to help her but I couldn’t send her answer. Network once more betrayed. I prayed that day and the question didn’t come in exam. On hearing that I felt relieved.

Days passed by, all things were going good. One early morning I checked her text as usual but that day I got a text from her all of a sudden, “You have to get over me and for that we need to stop talking!” I was kind of shocked what happened actually? We didn’t part our ways then. We talked the same way

But it was never same like before! I tried best to make things look like before but I failed. We don't talk anymore like we used to do.

We finally blocked each other for good. But I miss her every single day.

Samip, Where are you?
Yes, Momma coming!
What were you busy with ?
I was reading “I loved her enough to let her go!” By Dr. Samip
Where did you find this?
I found it in your safe.

She looked at it and beamed with immense pleasure.

Sam: Momma, Why are you smiling for no reason?

She: Smile is the best thing that you can do with your lips , my dear son !

© 2020 Samip Katwal


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