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I Wish To Be A Cat

Updated on April 4, 2012

Watch Me Now

I am a little devil

Covered in fur and have a fluffy tail

Oh come close to me

Hug me and I will scratch

I will jump on the table until you tell me to get down

I will chase the air and then stop

As if you care

My world is so much smaller than yours

You fill up every room and every bureau with your stuff

I don't even have one bag to pack

How would you like to be me ?

Always racing away

I could be stepped on at any moment

You never let me eat at the table

All I get is the floor and a dish

Water day after day when you have beverages and lots of alcohol

Ever wonder why cats are in a bad mood

You smoke and cough and walk with dirty shoes

I sniff I crawl and you think it is funny

When I shed my hair you complain

Every six weeks off you go to the hair dresser and get your hair done and nails painted

I am a cat I rhyme with rat

A really disgusting creature

You rub my head and under my chin

Then you throw me a fake mouse

Like I am suppose to be happy

Leave me alone all day as you walk in the summer air

When you come home

All I get is a look a stare

Then you say in a scary voice

What have you done?

I make up imaginary friends to pass the time

You use the cell phone and have people over

I hear your loud parties on weekends when I am trying to sleep

I feel your little cousin grab my tail and then I get shooowed away and spanked

Life is not easy being a cat

So next time treat me like an angel and give me some wings

Let me fly up high and dance on the ceiling

You would be surprised how things would change

I could make your boring company leave with only one hiss

I could make your girlfriend jump and you could see under her dress

I would leave your favorite pillow alone

All I ask is for a nice juicy steak once and awhile

An allowance would be nice so I can go out late night

Think about the things that make you excited

Share some with me and we both will be delighted

Good night and remember I am Ms. Charlette to you

Proper names sound so fancy

So much better than the fancy feast that you give me

That turns all hard and nasty

Next time break out the champaign and skip the glasses

We will party with those fancy red solo cups

Turn up the country music

Let Toby Keith sing

He knows how to have fun

I am sure he has a cat

With a truck of his own and a big hat

Lets all party!!


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    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 5 years ago

      Dim Flaxenwick We always need a happy balance.A little laughter with all those serious matters.We are all here for a reason lets find out what the reasons are.I am glad I could make you happy.Thanx so much.

    • Dim Flaxenwick profile image

      Dim Flaxenwick 5 years ago from Great Britain

      This has me rolling in the aisles, as they say, and holding my stomach from laughing. I ADORE cats as you know, and this hub written from a cats point of view is absolutely brilliant.

      Should I mention I ALWAYS vote up, and this time, funny and awesome.

    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 5 years ago

      ChristyWrites The only thing I have trouble liking is what they eat.Cat food eeeek.Thanx so much.

    • ChristyWrites profile image

      Christy Birmingham 5 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Oh the life of a cat!! Well explained in poetic form :)

    • DREAM ON profile image

      DREAM ON 5 years ago

      Feline Prophet To a simpler life and one that makes you happy just by chewing on a sneaker or a shoe.catfish33 What a wonderful way to spend an evening meeting friends and always finding a new reason to meow.Thanx so much and may you always be excited and on a new adventure.

    • catfish33 profile image

      Jeffrey Yelton 5 years ago from Maryland

      I will share this on facebook with all my cat-loving friends!

    • profile image

      Feline Prophet 5 years ago

      May your wish come true! :)