If Ever There was a Time for Study...
The Time is Now
It's hard to believe that I'm a graduate student. It's even more difficult to comprehend that once I graduate I will be a professional--not just in my own eyes, but in those of my family and in those of my friends. I can hardly wait, but I'm glad not to be there yet. All the pressure that will come in 2 years time. All the moments of grief and devastation that will elapse between now and then. Those are the moments I long for, desperately. The moment I begin writing my thesis. The first word I begin with and the last word on the page (likely a citation). Those are the only things, and by things I mean miracles, that I never thought would come true.
My miracle is my own. It's not that I chose for this miracle to occur, rather than curing the illnesses of those suffering from any obstruction--mental or physical. It is simply that I was given this opportunity and I was lucky enough to have people around me who advised me to go for it. They advised me to study these concrete facts and meet my abstract goals, by way of learning and communication with others. My peers in the workplace may not know this but I can't be at work very long, before I start to wonder what precursors I'm going to elect when I run my first lab on the multicultural variables that influence life satisfaction and mental health.
They can't possible understand that while I pour this glass of water, I'm actually labeling all the individual elements of hydrogen and oxygen and devising a plan to make water appear cleanly in West Africa. I know these things and I think these things, but I can't help but give thanks for all the little things--the moments where I am reminded that I can create new lives by fortifying old ones. I am beyond grateful and I will remember this when I'm old and gray myself--life is short but bittersweet, and I wouldn't have it be any other way, shape, or form.
Otherwise, it's all the same.