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I'm Mostly A human :)

Updated on October 8, 2009

This one sucks and i know it~ i tthink staying away for a long while has its side effects :(

Let the rain fall down my ceramic dead skin

Let the lightning shine over my life of sin

Hear my calls echo through the lonesome night

Begging for forgiveness which is one human right

Can you hear me fall

Can you hear me call?

Guilt runs in my veins like bloody red

Can you look into my murky past and see the life I’ve lead

I’ve lead a traumatizing journey, and a life I have spent

Forgiveness I never was granted, faith not even a cent

My hails dig deep into my cold scalp thinking about what I have done

My past haunts me like a pray, treacherous and slick like having a gun

I’ve seen myself tremble before the pain and insanity

And lead an unfruitful life yet I still have my humanity

I have my shares of dirty deeds

I have the guilt that lurks and feeds

I‘ve done what a sane man would never attempt

I have drowned in the bitterness of my past and contempt

Trapped in the hate and loss of oneself

I have once put my conscience on a shelf

I never got it right when it came to life

My  life turned to grow over misery and strife

I have walked in failure until I drowned

I am here, in failure my home I’ve found

Oh I have been a stranger in this life, useless unremarkable

I have my past my sins that suffocate my breath unforgivable

If you give me the chance do it once again I wouldn’t say No

You should believe me though now in lying I am a prow

I might be a sinner, might deserve to burn eternally in hell

Yet I am a human mostly. And I’m proud of it no need to tell

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    • Uriel profile image
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      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      :D:D:D:D: thnx tantrum

    • tantrum profile image

      tantrum 7 years ago from Tropic of Capricorn

      Dark ! but I like the feeling ! Good poem !

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      AIDY :D thanks for the support :D Well i have been out of my league for a while since i was buried with worries and homework but i am glad that you like this tiny poem :D School is pretty challenging but i like it this way :D Had a chemistry Test today :D it felt more like an IQ test or something but i have a good feeling about it. I Hope your schooling and courses are going ok :D

      Ralwus, Yeh being an adult means making choices by your own and learning to live with the consequences whether or not they are what we expected. Well, no matter what happens we have to live and find peace or wisdom with the past. The last couple of weeks were a little challenging but i guess i have everything under control. Decisions have been made and consequences have been charted and statistically i know i will make it. Everything happens for a reason and there is good somewhere in the shadows no matter how i feel about the present situation ~ btw i am a total nerd and all these vague lines are about school LOL~

      Xtasis! I couldn't help but agree. Yes there is light somewhere and the key is to have faith and try to be optimistic :D Thank you for your comments and supportive words :D

      Always honored!

      thanglynn07 , Yeh you reminded me that we HUMANS are far away from perfection. Yes we do make mistakes and probably some are unrepairable yet we learn wisdom and learn to row in the murky river keeping in the back of our minds that one day we will reach the shore and see the sun set and a new dawn break. We learn to listen to our past and make peace. thanglynn07 We ARE HUMANS and i totally thank you for your lovely comment !

    • thanglynn07 profile image

      thanglynn07 7 years ago from Long Beach, CA

      I loved this poem! I love your rhyming skills! And it made perfect sense! I loved these lines:

      Let the rain fall down my ceramic dead skin

      Let the lightning shine over my life of sin

      Hear my calls echo through the lonesome night

      Begging for forgiveness which is one human right

      Being human means we weren't built for perfection. We do have flaws but that's how we were built. To do our wrongs and try to right them. Or at least learn from our mistakes. Nonetheless, we are only human...This was beautifully written! Loved it!

    • XTASIS profile image

      XTASIS 7 years ago from The Beginning

      Heavy stuff! I liked it! Very real and hurting. Sometimes life is dark, but there's always one with a light.

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      I was not going to sign in, just read and comment later. America is the only country that went from barbarism to decadence without civilization in between. Have you been visiting us? have you been a wicked girl in that school of learning? What have they been doing to my sweet innocent Uriel? Anybody can be good in the country; there are no temptations there. I know you don't want to live in the country. So, now you have had a taste of honey and it is good. You are a big girl now. Stop beating your self up and live. this does not suck, you are being torn between adulthood's ways and childhood's innocence. It is only natural. hugs dear Uriel, CC

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      Am I dead, yet? 7 years ago

      Uriel--I enjoyed reading no matter what you may think of it! Hope you are doing well with courses--good to see you still writing! Keep it up =D