In the Silence of Every Night
Not all mistakes were intended to cause harm
My marriage is a relationship that is like many relationships in existence. We have our ups and our downs, our good times and bad times, but just like other relationships, we have had to learn together and work through the stress that life throws at us. He a well as I have caused our fair share of hurt, we have each said the wrong thing at a time when the wrong words cut deeper than expected. I have stood by him, when he has fallen down. I have also been the one that allowed my hurt; fear and anger to keep me at arms length. He has not always been there when I needed him to be, nor has he always been truthful when giving me an answer. We have made mistakes, but not all mistakes were intended to harm, but were misguided good intentions.
There was a time when he carried the burden of bills alone, when I was not able to work but carried the burden of children and keeping a home, I never felt as if he saw my contributes. I struggled to communicate what I was feeling to him. He struggled to see past his point of view to see me. We had to learn how to work together-and see the attributes each of us gave to the relationship…once we realized that neither of us was alone in the relationship and although what each gave to the relationship was different, we were each trying for the same reason, which was our love. - We got back to living our lives to
Love is magical-but magic doesn’t happen on its own. It takes patience, acceptance, forgiveness, understanding and a lot of hard work. But at the end of the day-it is worth every bit of effort it took to arrive here and every bit of effort it takes to remain here.
This poem represents the emotional spiral that is felt when you don’t know how to refocus. You feel as if you have lost your love and future. The loneliness-as well as anger intertwines, until you can stop and see that you have never been right when you didn’t take the time to see through the other person’s perspective. Once you stop to see that you didn’t start alone, you can shine brighter and guide each other.
I hope you enjoy this poem and have been lucky enough to have the magic of love in your life.
Life Continues to Happen
Darkness will disappear
Don’t tell me that you love me,
When your intentions are no where around.
Don’t tell me that you’ll always be there,
When you weren’t even there when it began.
I am so tired of the words.
So tired of the fight.
So tired of every promise once told,
Which now keep me up at night?
Are you serious when you say,
The promises that turn to lies?
The lies that are never here for me ,
When I turn away to hide when I cry.
Sweetness turns to bitterness.
The bitterness erases every kiss.
The tears sink in,
And stain her face,
With every wound she has from this place.
I wish I could understand why everything feels so cold-
One minute you will say stay-the next you tell me, just go.
I am no better-no more gentle with my words.
When I speak back to you-I sometimes pray that my words will hurt.
Does it really matter,
To even stay and try,
When every other day,
We give a reason to say goodbye?
My heart breaks,
My stomach turns,
I am scared to start over,
With a heart so broken and torn.
Foolish little games,
I am now playing with myself,
Trying to convince my soul,
I am meant for something else.
Truth as it may been seen,
I don’t like to live in lies,
I am not sure how,
We will ever come to a compromise.
Sweet sounds of dreams,
In the silence of every night.
When I wake in the morning,
I wake up to my life.
Follow the dreams,
Know what is right,
Because even if you wake up screaming,
Darkness will disappear -
For I have become the light.
Darkness can disappear
Relationships are not easy. Adding the stress of having children, paying bills and changing as individuals can cause a break down in the way that we communicate. It is inevitable that when we open up our hearts to another human being and dedicate ourselves to them-we will feel pain, feel frustration, and feel anger for our inability to communicate effectively. Relationships take constant work because our lives are constantly changing and developing. Fights will happen, words will be spoken that we wish we could reclaim-happiness will feel like it is lost and you will feel as if you are losing control of who you are. Just when you believe you have lost what you had with someone…you will feel the spark and ignite love within your soul that will guide you through the darkness and bring you back to a place that gives you the dedication to make your relationship prosper. Love is hard to find-No one will ever be perfect. But if we are lucky enough to find someone that continues to want to get to know us and fight with us, shouldn’t we take the pain and frustration and let it go to reclaim our happiness and love?
No mater who we are with-the stress of life will challenge your love-remember that you can challenge the stress by continuing communication.
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