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In the Silence of Every Night

Updated on December 24, 2010

Not all mistakes were intended to cause harm

My marriage is a relationship that is like many relationships in existence. We have our ups and our downs, our good times and bad times, but just like other relationships, we have had to learn together and work through the stress that life throws at us. He a well as I have caused our fair share of hurt, we have each said the wrong thing at a time when the wrong words cut deeper than expected. I have stood by him, when he has fallen down. I have also been the one that allowed my hurt; fear and anger to keep me at arms length. He has not always been there when I needed him to be, nor has he always been truthful when giving me an answer. We have made mistakes, but not all mistakes were intended to harm, but were misguided good intentions.

There was a time when he carried the burden of bills alone, when I was not able to work but carried the burden of children and keeping a home, I never felt as if he saw my contributes. I struggled to communicate what I was feeling to him. He struggled to see past his point of view to see me. We had to learn how to work together-and see the attributes each of us gave to the relationship…once we realized that neither of us was alone in the relationship and although what each gave to the relationship was different, we were each trying for the same reason, which was our love. - We got back to living our lives to

Love is magical-but magic doesn’t happen on its own. It takes patience, acceptance, forgiveness, understanding and a lot of hard work. But at the end of the day-it is worth every bit of effort it took to arrive here and every bit of effort it takes to remain here.

This poem represents the emotional spiral that is felt when you don’t know how to refocus. You feel as if you have lost your love and future. The loneliness-as well as anger intertwines, until you can stop and see that you have never been right when you didn’t take the time to see through the other person’s perspective. Once you stop to see that you didn’t start alone, you can shine brighter and guide each other.

I hope you enjoy this poem and have been lucky enough to have the magic of love in your life.

Life Continues to Happen


Darkness will disappear

Don’t tell me that you love me,
When your intentions are no where around.
Don’t tell me that you’ll always be there,
When you weren’t even there when it began.

I am so tired of the words.
So tired of the fight.
So tired of every promise once told,
Which now keep me up at night?

Are you serious when you say,
The promises that turn to lies?
The lies that are never here for me ,
When I turn away to hide when I cry.

Sweetness turns to bitterness.
The bitterness erases every kiss.
The tears sink in,
And stain her face,
With every wound she has from this place.

I wish I could understand why everything feels so cold-
One minute you will say stay-the next you tell me, just go.
I am no better-no more gentle with my words.
When I speak back to you-I sometimes pray that my words will hurt.

Does it really matter,
To even stay and try,
When every other day,
We give a reason to say goodbye?

My heart breaks,
My stomach turns,
I am scared to start over,
With a heart so broken and torn.

Foolish little games,
I am now playing with myself,
Trying to convince my soul,
I am meant for something else.

Truth as it may been seen,
I don’t like to live in lies,
I am not sure how,
We will ever come to a compromise.

Sweet sounds of dreams,
In the silence of every night.
When I wake in the morning,
I wake up to my life.

Follow the dreams,
Know what is right,
Because even if you wake up screaming,
Darkness will disappear -
For I have become the light.

Darkness can disappear

Relationships are not easy. Adding the stress of having children, paying bills and changing as individuals can cause a break down in the way that we communicate. It is inevitable that when we open up our hearts to another human being and dedicate ourselves to them-we will feel pain, feel frustration, and feel anger for our inability to communicate effectively. Relationships take constant work because our lives are constantly changing and developing. Fights will happen, words will be spoken that we wish we could reclaim-happiness will feel like it is lost and you will feel as if you are losing control of who you are. Just when you believe you have lost what you had with someone…you will feel the spark and ignite love within your soul that will guide you through the darkness and bring you back to a place that gives you the dedication to make your relationship prosper. Love is hard to find-No one will ever be perfect. But if we are lucky enough to find someone that continues to want to get to know us and fight with us, shouldn’t we take the pain and frustration and let it go to reclaim our happiness and love?

No mater who we are with-the stress of life will challenge your love-remember that you can challenge the stress by continuing communication.


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    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      thanks Ma' too....

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      thanks so much for the comment and for reading my work.... I appreciate you taking your time to give me much appreciated feedback.

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      thanks for the comment and for reading some more of my writing- I appreciate you following my work. Glad that you enjoyed the poem :)

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      and Merry Xmas to you as well

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      thanks sir for your comment and for continuing to follow me

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State

      Mike Lickteig

      thanks for the encouragement/ compliment... I appreciate it :) Merry Xmas Mike...hope it was blessed...

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State

      Veronica Allen

      as always, thanks for the feedback, and for continuing to follow my work and draw your own hope and perspective from what I write.

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      thanks for your comment and uplifting outlook.

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State

      A.A. Zavala

      thanks for the feedback and for taking the time to read some of my work- I am glad you enjoyed

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State


      as i am yours Ms Lorlie...thanks for the comment- i hope you had a great christmas!

    • chinemeremz profile image

      chinemeremz 7 years ago

      It is nice appreciating what you have.

      I feel so happy seeing two people so love and understand themselves like your spouse and you.

      I wish you both more merrier and happier days ahead as man and wife.

      Thanks for sharing!

    • Veronica Allen profile image

      Veronica Allen 7 years ago from Georgia

      What a great reminder for all of us struggling to keep our relationships intact.....or revive one. Thank you for showing us that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. In the end communication is the key.

    • Mike Lickteig profile image

      Mike Lickteig 7 years ago from Lawrence KS USA

      There are ups and downs in any relationship, and you are absolutely correct--it takes hard work and perseverance to make a relationship succeed. I admire your efforts to make things work well for you.

      Happy holidays.


    • A.A. Zavala profile image

      Augustine A Zavala 7 years ago from Texas

      In life there's balance. We can't have pleasure without pain, anger without love, sorrow without happiness. It's my hope that you and yours experience more positive than bad. Thank you for sharing.

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Powerful poem, HC. I am once again proud to be your follower!

      Have a marvelous holiday season.

    • daravuthz profile image

      daravuthz 7 years ago from Cambodia

      Thank you very much for sharing. Merry Christmas to you and your family :)

    • profile image

      rx4u 7 years ago

      H.C.- your words ring so true especially at this time of year. Thanks for the reminder "life will challenge your love-remember that you can challenge the stress by continuing communication." Great Advice!

    • sligobay profile image

      sligobay 7 years ago from east of the equator

      Best wishes for a Merry Christmas and a Happy ,healthy, and prosperous New Year, Holly. Thank you for the poetry of your life. The trials and travails are all part of the interminable struggle which defines life and who we are. There would be no pleasure if there were no pain. Cheers.

    • prettydarkhorse profile image

      prettydarkhorse 7 years ago from US

      beautiful, HC, Merry Christmas to you and your fam..

    • Cagsil profile image

      Cagsil 7 years ago from USA or America

      Hey Holly, this was a wonderful poem and you'd be right relationships are difficult. It takes two actively conscious minds to recognize what it takes to keep a relationship alive. I'm always available to talk with, whenever you like and I'm pretty sure you know that, but I wanted to make sure you do. :) ;) You've a lot to offer any man on this planet and any man unable to see what you truly have to give is a blind fool. I hope you have a wonderful holidays, even though I know what's happening isn't going to make it easy. I cherish your friendship and grown more by learning about you, the struggle you have and knowing what path you're looking for. Remain strong, determined and as you are(don't change a thing). Thank you very much for sharing. Love ya! :) :D

    • H.C Porter profile image

      Holly 7 years ago from Lone Star State

      the clean life

      thanks for your comment, I am glad you enjoyed the hub and I completely agree with what you shared.

    • the clean life profile image

      Mark Bruno 7 years ago from New Jersey Shore

      What a great Hub and you are so right relationships are hard to keep on the up. It takes lots of work and pure love to keep a relatioship solid. Yes we all have our problems but if we love each other truly and unconditionally we will be able to work evrything out in a postive way.

      Have a Very Merry Christmas and a Sahe and Happy New Years!!! :)