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Is Someone You Love Suffering?

Updated on July 21, 2009

How do you feel?

Feeling Helpless? Handicapped ? Crippled ? not able to make things better for the ones we love. Are you hurting both physically or emotionally We see our loved ones failing in several things, from an illness, from an addiction,from school.and we have no control over what is happening.

We abandon the one we care about if we get so overwhelmed by the feeling helpless that some of us choose to become un-involved, or "waiting it out".Or we may inadverently alienate them or prevent them from owning and dealing with the suffering.We can jeopardize our own welfare, by worrying endlessly.

You feel helpless and someone you love feels helpless...opportunity and challenge are here.. to develop or deepen friendship, to build intimacy and to offer unconditional love.

We need to take the initiative: to write a simple note,say a kind word,a gentle touch and a listening ear can mean a lot to someone in pain. Especially MEN need to share their feelings, fears,touch,and their tears.

People who are in pain and suffering can often be our best teachers. They have a way of showing us the true meaning of patience, compassion and faith.

We need to be aware of what we say about God. when we are not comfortable about feeling helpless, we can make some comments that are not proper about God's will, plan or role in suffering. We need to let suffering people vent their frustration, anger and maybe even hatred of God. Until a sufferer acknowledges despair he or she can not befriend it.

There are available resources to help people who are suffering, support groups,or professionals in the ministry, or counseling and health-care. Good will is sometimes not enough in all situations---special skills which we may lack---are very often needed in many cases and you may need to turn to them. Sometimes if we try to take control of a situation when the suffering person needs to really deal with, we actually hinder them. They need to feel the pain, taking responsibilty for it. We can feel for another, we can be there for them, but we can never suffer for another.

Sometimes the most empowering action we can take is to Listen.. We must beware of our limits and also take care of ourselves.What we give depends on our life's circumstances , our relationships with the person.

When we are helpless we have more questions then answers and our God may seem far away. And we may feel like just forgetting to try anymore. But this is the exact time we need to trust in our faith and our God. In the midst of crisis are further opportunities for loving unconditionally and becoming more fully human. TAKE HEART. G-Ma :o) hugs

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    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 4 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Mellonyy...ThankYou and nice to meet you. I recently lost the one Mother I had and am so missing her, she taught me so much in her suffering years. Remember "Cherish each moment"...:o) Hugs G-Ma

    • Mellonyy profile image

      Mellonyy 4 years ago

      Great and useful information, thanks for sharing!

    • freelanceauthor profile image

      freelanceauthor 5 years ago

      Nice hub. If someone you love is suffering, the best thing to do is say a prayer, and being there beside the person. Presence means a lot for them.

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 8 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Awww here you are again, great..and Thanks sweet one...:O) Mom

    • cindizzj@yahoo.co profile image

      cindizzj@yahoo.co 8 years ago from Northern California

      That is a great bit of writing Mom.

    • Patience Virtue profile image

      Patience Virtue 9 years ago from All Over

      I really appreciated the part you put in about letting them vent anger or even hatred towards God. I have a friend who's been dealing with anger at God, but I think the Christian circles she's in prevent her from being honest about how she feels. That's so sad, because when people can't even be honest about what they're going through it will only lengthen the time it will take for them to heal! And you're definitely right, listening is a key part in all of this.

    • G-Ma Johnson profile image
      Author

      Merle Ann Johnson 9 years ago from NW in the land of the Free

      Mr.Marmalade...Thank You Sir..I appreciate your comments always...and is so true what you say. G-Ma :o) hugs

      vijayanths...Thanking you too for your comments and the Hug...time heals a lot..but hurts anyway..G-Ma :o) hugs

      soyelude...And to you My Friend, Thank You...yes our journey is all about love and caring...in that way we can support each other..one way or another...G-Ma :o) hugs

    • soyelude profile image

      soyelude 9 years ago from Lagos - Nigeria

      Everyone must have their fair dose of pain...we can be there for them to lean on. This journey called life is all about support, love and caring. Thanks for sharing this G-ma. Love.

    • profile image

      vijayanths 9 years ago

      yes, certain things are not in our hands to control.it is really painful to see our beloved ones suffering. It is miserable.hugs

    • MrMarmalade profile image

      MrMarmalade 9 years ago from Sydney

      Ma! as promised.

      We need to take the initiative: to write a simple note,say a kind word,a gentle touch and a listening ear can mean a lot to someone in pain.

      We all know many people going through the area of pai,I like your thoughts