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Ode To a Kitty Cat

Updated on October 18, 2010

Ode to a Kitty

You are still adorable, still as lovely as you’ve ever been.

Although your cuddly softness left you as soon as rigamortis set in.

I will not let you go, from my heart or from my sight

Though you lay there stiff and alone, like a nerdy boy on prom night.


I will not let you go… not for the piano that begs to be re-strung,

Not due to the odor emanating from your tail and its coated stale dung.

Not for the neighbors who complain about the smell,

Mr. Peters in apartment 403 can just go to Hell.


It’s been eight months since you left me and meowed for the last time,

Though I had you only a few days, you became a true friend of mine.

We would have been together longer, your life would have surely last,

Had I not enrolled in that internet-based veterinary medical class.


So now you lay motionless, my power tools deep inside you,

All your nine lives used up, your carcass now a deep blue hue.

A conversation piece, a door stop, a former pet all in one,

An yet still quite a bit tasty, when all is said and done.






Please note that no animals were harmed during the production of the poem above.

All blame and complaints should be directed to..

http://hubpages.com/hub/Killer-Ideas-for-Your-Next-Hub

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    • sassyk73 profile image

      Karen A. Harris 6 years ago from Milwaukee, WI

      lol....all I have to say is wow...lmfao :)

    • Cardisa profile image

      Carolee Samuda 7 years ago from Jamaica

      HP is place for comedy..............

      You murderer, you killed the poor pussycat with powertools.

    • SaMcNutt profile image

      SaMcNutt 7 years ago from Englewood, CO

      Twisted and funny. Reminds me of a short story by Flannery O'Connor (I think it was her). She sleeps next to her dead lover, or something like that.

    • Anthea Carson profile image

      Anthea Carson 7 years ago from Colorado Springs

      Funny

    • profile image

      Brenda Durham 7 years ago

      haha

      Oh my God! I love cats, but this is hilarious, Greek One.

      Two thumbs up! errrr....rated UP and hugely funny!

    • ScottMadiJack profile image

      ScottMadiJack 7 years ago from Philadelphia, now living in Delaware.

      Seriously cracking up! That was too much! love it

    • schoolgirlforreal profile image

      schoolgirlforreal 7 years ago

      Gotta say, it's an interesting poem.....clever too :)

    • lorlie6 profile image

      Laurel Rogers 7 years ago from Bishop, Ca

      Congratulations on a lovely, poetic treatment of the kitty topic.

      I am a member of "The Three Judges Charity" and need you to know that I can be bought. Flowers will get you a couple of points, certainly, but I personally can be swayed by things that shine and shimmer. Cash is always acceptable, as long as it's graced with at LEAST 6 zeros. And the other numeral must be the first.

      I'm as honest as the day is long-I'm sure you can see that.

      Do let me know if you'd like to participate. I need to get to work on my upcoming itinerary!

      I wish you well-

      lorlie6

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      LOLOLO

    • De Greek profile image

      De Greek 7 years ago from UK

      Hello?

      As one of the three judges of this here competition may I just say that I consider this Hub to be a likely candidate for first prize? A candidate, mind you, not a cert.

      May I also casually mention that we have formed a new charity, coincidentally called “The Three Judges Charity” and any contribution you may care to make to it shall be given the consideration it deserves?

      Furthermore, I wish to give the lie to inaccurately spurious and dastardly rumours spread by a person who shall remain nameless (let’s call him Stan for argument’s sake) that we shall be happy with bribes of only chocolates and flowers? Naturally we live for literature and are doing this for the good of humanity, but any poor chump who thinks that he or she will have a chance in hell of winning this competition with a bunch of flowers, has another thing coming. ;-)

    • ltfawkes profile image

      ltfawkes 7 years ago from NE Ohio

      "Mr. Peters in apartment 403 can just go to Hell."

      Yeah. Take that, Peters. (Like HE never kept a pet corpse around for eight months. Puh - lease!)

      Nice hub, Greek.

      L.T.

    • profile image

      rajab nsubuga 7 years ago

      Its quite a disturbing dream!

    • profile image

      DoorMattnomore 7 years ago

      Cool how you fit DIY surgery in there. No one ever said surgery had to be on people!! Awesome as always.

    • Mighty Mom profile image

      Susan Reid 7 years ago from Where Left is Right, CA

      The one word that comes to mind is ASSAULT. This ode is an assault to all of my senses, plus my sense of propriety.

      In short, I love it!

    • FloBe profile image

      Flo Belanger 7 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      ROFL...oh, my goodness!! I've never laughed so hard. Oh boy, after all these kitty poems, you'd never know that I'm really a cat-LOVER!

    • SomewayOuttaHere profile image

      SomewayOuttaHere 7 years ago from TheGreatGigInTheSky

      ..that was too funny! LOL!....and here I just put my poor kitty 'down' 2 weeks ago!......

    • Stan Fletcher profile image

      Stan Fletcher 7 years ago from Nashville, TN

      Greek, you have just taken the contest to a whole new level. I'm not sure the rest of the contestants can go that low. This was hysterical! Love it!

    • Uninvited Writer profile image

      Susan Keeping 7 years ago from Kitchener, Ontario

      I love this! :)

    • Haunty profile image

      Haunty 7 years ago from Hungary

      lol The best poetry is born of real life experience. Clearly, this has happened.

    • frogdropping profile image

      Andria 7 years ago

      lolol! You sir have employed due diligence in pursuit of your poetic art. I applaud you.

      Of course I'm also going to report you for the cruel and despicable act that caused the demise of your poor kitty. That goes without saying.

      The fact that you wrote a disclaimer doesn't actually mean I or anyone else would believe that you didn't remove all evidence of life from your pet. You appear to know too much about the death and suffering that power tools can cause :/

      Still, well done. More so because you're clearly stricken with grief. Marvelous :)

    • profile image

      ralwus 7 years ago

      LOL Winner fer sure! Yum.

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