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Kuttan from Quilon ( Kerala ) - in Heaven.( Wedding Video on Earth)

Updated on February 8, 2013
skgrao profile image

A qualified Textile Post Diploma Graduate and Ex.M D of a Textile Mill.

Some Picture - why not it be Kuttan.

Kuttan'body found on the back waters of Quilon,Kerala,God's Own Land.( Not real- Joke )
Kuttan'body found on the back waters of Quilon,Kerala,God's Own Land.( Not real- Joke )

Kuttan was a loner,no family.His body was found on the Back Waters of Kerala near Parvathi Mill a Govt Mill.The police on a complaint from a passer by took it and that was the last rites to Kuttan.

However Kuttan was lucky he went to Heaven as he had fallen from a over crowded boat in to the sea on a Hindu festival a very auspicious day.Hanging around his neck was a tag which said By pass 'Q',(VIP),so he was not allowed to stand in 'Q' and he went with the security right up to the Reception Desk.There seeing the Tag on his neck he was allowed right to the Registration Counter,the Angel there who was sitting with several Tray's and Registration Book told him to sign the book and a print our from her Computer,after taking his signature the Angel gave him a Pass with a Print that she took from a Red tray.It said No2 Heaven all the time Kuttan was silent but seeing No.2 Heaven from a Red Tray he asked the Angel why he was given such a Ticket,the conversation went on like this:

Angel - The Computer Says that is your Ticket.you have seen the print out and signed.

Kuttan - Let me see it again.

Angel - Actually it cannot be given but as I am from NEDUCHERRY close to your place Quilon I will give it.

Kuttan - Oh thanks actually my Mapillai ( Son in Law ) is residing in NEDUCHERRY.

Angel - Of what is his Name let me check if he has Checked in.

Kuttan - His name is Patan Kuttan.

Angel - After seeing the computer for few seconds,says he hasn't Checked in any way see the Print out and give it me back the Supervisor may be here now and I will be in trouble.

Kuttan - What you say trouble in Heaven.

Angel - Sure as hell,I am not supposed to give the Computer print out to you after you signed.You are supposed to have signed after reading.

Kuttan - What is the trouble like.?

Angel - It is his choice,he will Impose fine in $ and we have only Rs.To get $ we have to pay in Rs. twice that amount you pay to the Travel Agent in Kerala.

Kuttan - O K take it and tell me what is No.2 Heaven and what is No.1 Heaven.

Angel - No.2 is the last Economy Class heaven and the next is No.1 a First Class Heaven and the next is Delux Heaven the next is Super Delux and the next is Mega Super all are A/C of course.

Kuttan - What is the Difference in each and why so in heaven.

Angel - It is all Politics don't ask me anything if you need further information go to P R O's office and meet him.

Kuttan - Where is that Office of P R O.

Angel - Take the Metro and get down after 7 stops use your card to swipe for Ticket the Amount will be debited to your account.

Kuttan - What account.?

Angel - PRO will tell.

Kuttan - Why I should go to Station 7.What are Stations 1 to 6.

Angel - Station 1 is God's Chambers after that it is Station 2 his lady P A.after that it is his Station 3 meant for his family,Station 4 is his Advisors,Station 5 is his Council of Ministers,Station 6 is his Archives and Station 7 is his P R O and Security.

Kuttan then say's thanks to the Angel and takes the Metro and finds only one passenger who he comes to know is from Andhra and he was a Chief Minister who died in a train accident and he has a Ticket also for Mega Heaven.The ego of this Chief Minister irritates Kuttan and woes to take revenge one day.He gets down at Station 7 and finds lot of commotion and asks a passer by what happened.The fellow says in Hindi " Kisi ne P R O ko goli Mardiya hai" ( Some one has shot PRO ), and all were rejoicing his assassination. Kuttan finds he now has to go to Heaven No.2 and has to enquire there only.So he goes to Heaven No.2 which he sees on various sign boards and directions to different Heavens.After entering Heaven he is shown his Sigle Bed Room all attached and Independent.He asks for Tea to the Room Angel,She says only coffee is available and Tea is Baned in the kitchen as it was not to God's liking.As it was Banned in kitchen and not the Room he goes to WALMART and gets all the items needed to make Tea and his expences are not debited to his account yet and he gets what he wants.Soon he makes the Tea in his Room and the Smell of Tea gets all the people to come and drink his Kerala Tea by paying Rs.70/ or $.1.45 and this makes him rich,so Rich he Bribes every one and is a big GOD FATHER.

He Controls Heaven No.2.Soon God comes to know this Occupied Heaven by a Keralite.He sends his Home Minister who happens to be a Keralite and he meets Kuttan.Kuttan gives hin a VVIP tratment with a Lavish Party and a night with most pretty Angels and the next day he shows the pictures of the Home Minister with Angels in a very compromising angle naked and tells him to go screw God.The Home Minister returns to tell God it is occupied by Chines and Pakistanis.

God calls the Cabinrt Committe and the desicion was annonumous as to the action to be taken a Test of Atomic Bomb and Various Missiles made by DRDO and a letter to UN on matter to be taken up at the highest level.The Tests were done and letter is yet to be taken up by UN as China has objected.

Kuttan in Heaven is a King Now.

:-D


Video - Kerala Wedding.

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