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Lil' Good Behavior

Updated on October 28, 2014
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By: Wayne Brown

My mama told me she’d whip with a peach tree switch

If I did not calm my attitude and change my loud pitch

Instead of that switching, I got some ice cream to savor

Guess I got some more time off for my good behavior

 

Teacher had me write my name a hundred times or more

Told me to spend my recess time sitting on the floor

But when that recess bell rang, she gave a nodding waiver

Guess I got some more time off for all my good behavior

 

I met this girl when I was eighteen; I thought I was in love

She seemed to be my type custom made by the Lord above

But she run off with my best friend; seems she did me a favor

Guess I just got me more time off for all my good behavior

 

The motorcycle cop flashed his blues and pulled me to the curb

Told me my mufflers were loud and the peace I did disturb

But when he wrote that ticket he gave me a warning as a waiver

Looks like I’m getting more time off for all my good behavior

 

I told the boss man that I need to take me a real long needed rest

He told me to take some vacation, one week, no more, no less

But when I looked sad, he doubled his offer as a friendly favor

Looks like I am getting more time off for my good behavior

 

The warden of the prison told me that I would rot in this jail

Said I could not be pardoned; my attempts would only fail

But when that parole board met, he begged them for a waiver

Looks like I got me some more time off for all my good behavior

 

Standing at the Pearly Gates waiting for St Peter to open up

I claimed I would cause no trouble just be a good little pup

He scratched his head and smiled; sent me away with life to savor

Looks like I got me some more time off for all my good behavior

 

 

© Copyright WBrown2011. All Rights Reserved.

 

© 2011 Wayne Brown

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    • Wayne Brown profile image
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      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @W.R. Shinn...We all need some time off for good behavior even when our behavior isn's so good, huh? Thanks for the good words WR! WB

    • W.R. Shinn profile image

      W.R. Shinn 6 years ago

      Good work Wayne Brown! I'm in agreement with all of the above. For me it has always been the other way around. I pray daily for that last stanza. May God bless!

      Sincerely,

      W.

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @thebluestar...I'll be back! LOL! Thanks! WB

      @saddlerider1...That is one of my all-time favorite Hank Jr. songs. Motown2Chitown inspired me to write this one with one of her comments. I thought the song went well with the idea. Thanks for the good comments, Ken. WB

    • saddlerider1 profile image

      saddlerider1 6 years ago

      Gotta love old Hank's feelin better and getting off for good behavior to. I sure hope Vegas gave you rest, NOT...maybe you left some jingle jangle there for good behavior.

      They love us not to leave with too much, although they know it's only on loan to us and await our return for good behavior. Fun write Wayne, well done. I get a lot of chuckles from your funny bone side and an equal tear rolls down a cheek from your serious side or nightmares that keep me awake. he he.

    • thebluestar profile image

      Annette Donaldson 6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      Glad to have you back Wayne, now take a rest and hit us again with the magic next week lol

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @Vickie Bovender...Thanks so much, so glad you had fun with it. WB

      @Truckstop Sally...Lady Luck keep me from taking a financial bath in Vegas but my stupidity brought me home in the red but still within budget! WB

      @The Frog Prince....Thanks much Frog, you are a prince of a guy! LOL! WB

      @mslizee...Thanks so much, glad you liked it. WB

      @sueroy333...Yes, I confess...I am a bit of a nut. I try to hide it as best I can but it creeps out! LOL! WB

      @Stan Fletcher...Sorry to take so long getting back...been in Vegas for a week at the Hussy Convention. I do not have a melody but would be glad to have you write one! LOL! WB

      @WannaB Writer...This is probably every woman's husband! LOL! Thanks much! WB

      @Genna East...Nothing like a little luck in life to keep ya going and it is good to thank someone for it too! WB

      @thebluestar...Thanks for covering me Annette. It seems the last week would never end. Glad to be back! WB

    • thebluestar profile image

      Annette Donaldson 6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      HI GUYS, WAYNE IS AWAY FOR A WEEK THIS WEEK AND REGRETS HE CAN NOT REPLY TO YOUR MAIL, BUT HOLD ONTO YOUR SOCKS (OR SILK PANTIES) THE MASTER WILL REPLY ON HIS RETURN LOL

    • Genna East profile image

      Genna East 6 years ago from Massachusetts, USA

      Very clever, Wayne! I think everyone can say that we have been given a little time or a waiver for good behavior. Lady Luck has been on my side as well a number of times, and it's always good to give thanks.

    • mindyjgirl profile image

      Mindy 6 years ago from Cottage Grove, Oregon

      A new lease on life! I felt that way after I had the possibility of having lymphoma... life is good, no lymphoma. Now i'm just swamped with Dr. bills and I still have a lump in my neck that will probably need to come out sooner or later, but I don't have cancer WaHOO!!

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Frog it makes me want to watch coo coo's nest again. I just wish they had shown the Indian saying, "umm Juicy Fruit." when Nicholson figures out he can talk:). Yes LMAO!

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 6 years ago from Arlington, TX

      RHW - Now there's a real loony bin! LMAO

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      I have now! Omg! Thank you so much!!!! HE LARIOUS! I started watching it and I saw "one flew over the coo coo's nest - at the theater when it was released:). Then in popped OBAMA's gnarly head - I laughing spitting hard! Priceless - everyone should watch that. Joe Biden? Yes he needs to shout out who he is frequently - hardly anyone even remembers that mixed bag o nuts!

      Frog - thank you for that!

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 6 years ago from Arlington, TX

      RHW - It might be big but we know how to have a good time. Have you ever seen this?

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dJrBhtnQ42U&fea...

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      Ooh MO yes this probably is a real big loony bin! Hahahaha! I'm glad I found more people like me:-)!

    • WannaB Writer profile image

      Barbara Radisavljevic 6 years ago from Templeton, CA

      This reminds me of my husband. Sometimes he does things that I don't like (latest being breaking one of my favorite bowls accidentally) and if I start to express my displeasure, he gives me one of those appealing little boy faces guaranteed to soften my heart and give him a pass.

    • profile image

      Motown2Chitown 6 years ago

      Apparently, so does HP, RH, because here we all are in the same loony little bin! :)

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      I'm so glad you agree Frog Prince! I love the rule breakers:-)!!!!!

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 6 years ago from Arlington, TX

      RealHousewife - Us rule breakers gotta stick together. Grins!

    • RealHousewife profile image

      Kelly Umphenour 6 years ago from St. Louis, MO

      WB - I knew you were a good cowboy! Loved the video too - I also see you've got a fan base of rule breakers - no wonder I love it here:-)! Kismet!

    • The Frog Prince profile image

      The Frog Prince 6 years ago from Arlington, TX

      Kudos again Wayne. Reading that reminds me of a friend who has started the "Be Nice Or Else Club." It's only by invitation though. LMAO

      Good job and awesome as usual.

      The Frog

    • Stan Fletcher profile image

      Stan Fletcher 6 years ago from Nashville, TN

      Really dug this one, Wayne. It's a great country lyric and begging for a melody. Do you have one?

      And thanks for the Hank. It spoke to my inner redneck.

    • mslizzee profile image

      elizabeth 6 years ago from Buncombe County, NC

      Funny and clever.

    • sueroy333 profile image

      Susan Mills 6 years ago from Indiana

      This was fun! You are nutty.. but the world needs more nutty. (Not crazy, we have enough of those!)

      Thanks for the laugh!

    • profile image

      Motown2Chitown 6 years ago

      Me too, Sally. In an evaluation prior to entering the convent, the person writing up the report said I was "gregarious, fun-loving, and compassionate," but that I could also be known "to break rules." I figured they'd show me the door after that. She said it meant that people were more important to me than rules. Go figure. So, yup, I got a pass on that one too!

      :)

    • Truckstop Sally profile image

      Truckstop Sally 6 years ago

      Fun hub! My guess is you have lots of experience with Lady Luck! I am a big rule follower (almost) all the time. I work so hard at doing the right thing. So when I do "bend" the rules a little -- I get a pass too. Thank goodness!

    • Vickie Bovender profile image

      Vickie Bovender 6 years ago from Southeastern US

      Most entertaining as always, Wayne. Voting you up and awesome. :)

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @dahoglund...They need a button like that I think...it might encourage some of these rascals to put on the good foot! Thanks, DA. WB

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @drbj...I think your assessment is correct...you have those advanced degrees..."Chock Full Of Nuts" seems right! LOL! WB

    • dahoglund profile image

      Don A. Hoglund 6 years ago from Wisconsin Rapids

      rated this up and funny.no buttton there for good behavior.

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 6 years ago from south Florida

      Clever, witty and fun. I dunno, Wayne, if you are like a "Snickers" bar, then I must be "Chock Full of Nuts." But I wouldn't have it any other way.

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @WillStarr...Thanks Will, glad it's not autobiographical! LOL! WB

      @Poohgranma...I'm like a Snickers Bar...just a little bit nutty! LOL! WB

      @Motown2Chitown...Glad you liked it. I thought ol' Hank Jr. doin' "Feelin' Better" was just right for this one. WB

    • profile image

      Motown2Chitown 6 years ago

      Not surprised in the least! Wonderful, wonderful, up, and awesome! Love you to pieces, Wayne Brown. So glad you share all these pieces of yourself for us to love!

    • Poohgranma profile image

      Poohgranma 6 years ago from On the edge

      It must all be in your positive attitude ... no one would want to burst your happy bubble so you are set free to spread your incurable happiness with the rest of the world ... ha ha ha

    • WillStarr profile image

      WillStarr 6 years ago from Phoenix, Arizona

      Fun and funny!

    • Wayne Brown profile image
      Author

      Wayne Brown 6 years ago from Texas

      @thebluestar...Yes, we do even if we earn it tongue in cheek! Thanks so much! WB

      @rasenstars1...Thank you, I sure will try! WB

    • rasenstars1 profile image

      rasenstars1 6 years ago

      very nice wayne. i throughly enjoyed this work. keep up the good work!

    • thebluestar profile image

      Annette Donaldson 6 years ago from Northern Ireland

      We all deserve time off for good behaviour Wayne, and looking at those eyes in your profile photo I can just see the way of it. Very funny and a joy to read as always. OBTW I hate being the first one to comment lol

      Please do me a small favour and check out my latest hub Playing in the sand, I would like an honest opinion. My toy boy taxi driver thinks my poetry is getting a little better but I would like to hear from my hero lol