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"Let Others Help When They Offer" © Rolly A. Chabot

Updated on February 17, 2013
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Welcome

Please gather around while this old guy beats out another hub. This will be the second in as many days. I was inspired to write about something that is very near and dear to my heart. That is the act of kindness and what we do with it.

Our very own Leslie Silverman wrote a piece a while back that I missed seeing until tonight. It is one of those writings that tug at the heart because it was written from the heart. I thank you Leslie for sharing such a story. I recall seeing this on the news and I recall having tears over what I saw. Please readers take a look at this and tell me it does not touch you in some way.

http://imkarn23.hubpages.com/hub/Officer-DePrimo-HOW-to-Perform-the-Perfect-Random-Act-of-Kindness

Tonight I would like to share with you a little of what happened to me several years ago and the lesson I leaned from it. Gather around, help yourself to some hot chocolate as we are getting chilly here. Make yourself at home please. Thank for the blessing of your coming here and please I do hope you take a blessing with you when you leave... If nothing else know that you are loved.

Don't Stay Outside

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Our Needs vs Pride

Several years ago I found myself living in somewhat of an unfavourable situation. Through my own demise I was living in a very small run down converted motel where room had been made into suites as they were called. This place was but one step up from welfare. I lived there for a year without work and on what was left of my savings.

I found I had time on my hands and donated much of my time. The local Church I belonged to needed some help. The facility we rented required to be set up and taken apart each Sunday and I became the leader of the team doing the work. That summer the Pastor was building a house o his farm in the country and I donated many hours helping there and they would feed me and send me home a few times a week with eggs . I also helped out at the food bank helping those in need.

Come late fall I found I was running short of cash and the cupboards and fridge were bare. I can laugh about now but when all you eat is oatmeal or rice three times a day you soon learn to appreciate it.

I come from a family that taught perseverance through the worst of times. Pride was something I taught myself and would have never told anyone I was in need. It was just not part of my nature. I was getting by and hoping something would come about.

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Life is a Spiral

Life changes quickly for most of us. For the moment it was where I found myself. In the eyes of others I was doing fine. In my eyes I was hurting and would not tell anyone. I just kept limping along and doing what I could to get by

It was close to Christmas when I got a phone call one day. It was Mary from the Food Bank telling me they had a hamper for me from someone who cared. My immediate response was to tell her to give it to another in need because I was just fine. They tried again a few days later and I refused again. It was all about the pride I had encased myself in.

I found work shortly after Christmas that year and started the long process of attempting to rebuild again. It was not easy. I had known far too well what it was like to have it all then all of a sudden have nothing. It was here I bought a used computer and started to write my thoughts and share them with others and eventually a small local publication. My little apartment became a home and once I found peace it became a sanctuary for me. Rather than keep my door closed and locked, it was left open and many would come and visit.

It was again in the spring I was helping the Pastor with his house and he stopped me that day and asked me a question that changed the way I look not only at giving but receiving as well. He was a man of few words but I will always hold his words dear. "Rolly I have a question for you. What kind of a heart are you giving with when you refuse to receive? I babbled on and on and eventually learned it was the Church that had attempted to help me out and I had refused.

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Sunrise and a New Day

I guess at the start of a new day there is hope. You know that person in the service industry you got angry with because they maybe got your order wrong or that man that is working a menial job. Do not judge because it could happen to any of us. No matter who people are and what they do we still all have feelings wants and desires. Sometimes we need to humble ourselves. It can happen to us all and when it does we come back a better and a stronger person.

It is when we accept where we are in life and fill ourselves with thankfulness do we blossom like a flower on a sunny day. I so love to be around people who have such an outlook. In times of darkness they are the sunshine for many people. When you find something negative about life I beg you to stop and look for the positives of the situation. We live in a soup kettle of emotions. Why not sprinkle a little joy and gratitude into the mix and share it with others. You just never know what you may learn along the way.

"What kind of a heart are you giving with is what I ask." After living through it, I can tell you a far more thankful heart and one that appreciates far more than I deserve. Take the time today and look at your motives for giving and ask yourself can I receive. Is it better to receive with a humble heart? You can bet it is because it changes the heart that gives. Never ever rob the blessing of giving from another who is reaching out to you. Trust me they have no intention of hurting you, all they want to do is bless you. Allow them the joy of knowing they have helped in some way.

Never steal from those who give for the gift they give with will mean far more than the pride that you carry. After all is it not the way we are to be. Even when we have nothing we can give something. A smile, a kind word, a hug, a listening ear. I think back at all those who did it for me in life and it is the least I can do to repay them.

You see I learned a great deal during this little bump in the road. Giving and receiving fall hand in hand with love. It is funny a few months ago I drove slowly past that little apartment. It is a number of years older and even more run down but it still holds many fond memories. The greatest of all is "What kind of a heart do I give with today?


© Rolly A. Chabot


Giving

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    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Lisa... God Bless you right back... Thank you for visiting the Fireside...

      Hugs and Blessings from Canada

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
      Author

      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Debbie... Thanks for the comment and the kind words. Yes you are so right in the fact we do have to know the hard times to more appreciate the better times. There is a great blessing in giving to another purely and simply from the heart. Thank you for sharing and thank you for the links...

      Hugs and Blessings

    • Lisa Luv profile image

      Lisa J Warner AKA Lisa Luv 4 years ago from Conneticut, USA

      Wonderful....GOD Bless...

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      Rolly you know what? you are an amazing man.. Your heart is so full of love and good.. I know God taught you all that.. The day you gave your heart to the Lord he gave you your pure heart.

      God Bless you my sweet friend and brother in Christ

      Sometimes we have to go through hard times to understand and appreciate what God has for us.. we have to learn not only to give but to receive. You learned a valuable lesson my friend.

      I am sharing this on Facebook on HOW site billy buc's site.

      https://hubpages.com/politics/HOW-Adopt-a-family-a...

      https://hubpages.com/literature/HOW-The-Holidays-A...

      I had wrote these last year. I hope you enjoy blessings to you always

      Debbie

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi pstraubie48... I do think we all have to experience a great loss before we can receive clearly understanding the heart of the giver. It is then we can give back with understanding and let the pride fall back by the wayside. It is hard to watch another in need without stepping in and helping.

      Hugs for writing this and many blessings

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi bac2basics... a touching comment my friend. Thank you for sharing your emotions and you see to me that is a heart who can give and can receive. Your words impacted me as well...

      Gentle hugs and many blessings

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Always... Like you I was raised poor. We never went without the basics but there was nothing left either. I suppose it instilled in me a few things over the years, when I wanted something I knew I had to work for it. It is not until you find yourself with nothing again do you revisit what do you really need. I would sooner give than receive and yet a gift given to me from the heart is something I hold higher in any standard because it has meaning and purpose.

      Hugs and Blessings for what you do my friend...

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Pam... so glad you liked this and hopefully it makes us all stop and look deep within. Humility is a gift and needs to be practiced...

      Hugs and Blessings from Alberta

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Eddy... good to see you like always... I am running so far behind in comments I think I am first... Giving and receiving go so much hand in hand and either needs an open heart...

      Hugs from Canada

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi AliciaC ... thanks for the comment and glad you found something to to take to heart. It is hard sometimes to find a balance when you are a giver or for that matter a taker. I think it so important to be able to receive with gratitude and yes sometimes even humility...

      Hugs and Blessings

    • pstraubie48 profile image

      Patricia Scott 4 years ago from sunny Florida

      It is difficult at times to receive especially because of that old meanie, Pride. Years ago my family and I were homeless and it was through the selfless giving of others that we found our way back. You are so right when you say, you never know when it may happen to you.

      Giving and receiving enlarge all of those touched by it. Thanks for sharing this with us. Sending Angels to you this evening :)ps

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Carol... sorry for the delay in getting back to you but alas I am here. I like the concept of simply being there for people as the need arrises. I find it is in these times we can touch base with people one on one. The greatest blessing in life is love and when you can share it with another on any scale we are the ones who are blessed.

      Hugs from Canada

    • bac2basics profile image

      Anne 4 years ago from Spain

      Hi Rolly.

      I am writing this comment with tears streaming down my face after reading your words and watching the video. You are so right about giving and accepting, even giving a smile or a hug can really make both the receiver and the givers day, I know this for a true fact. Giving is a gift to those who give and to those who receive, so never feel bad admitting you need help, accepting it is a gift to those who give it :)

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Gypsy... so true and yet it is not all that hard to help another. Far to often I have fiund people have been hurt or taken advantage of and it maybe stops them from helping another...

      Hugs from Canada

    • always exploring profile image

      Ruby Jean Fuller 4 years ago from Southern Illinois

      The video was not easy to watch, so many in need. God bless the man who has the heart of an angel. Your story hit home with me, i have always has too much pride, if i was in need nobody knew. I really never thought of recieving in the manner you mentioned. I have always felt the need to give, growing up poor does that to a person. Thank you Rolly. I read Leslie's piece and loved it..

    • Pamela99 profile image

      Pamela Oglesby 4 years ago from United States

      I am so glad you shared this story. I fully agree with you about giving with a humble heart. There is nothing more rewarding. This is a beautiful, thought provoking hub. God bless.

    • Eiddwen profile image

      Eiddwen 4 years ago from Wales

      Wonderful Rolly so much truth spoken and as always powerful and warm.

      Here's to so many more hubs for us both to share on here.

      Eddy.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      There is a wonderful message in this hub, Rolly! It's a very inspiring article. Thank you for sharing your experience and the great video.

    • carol7777 profile image

      carol stanley 4 years ago from Arizona

      This giving and receiving issue has so many facets as it can be simple or complex. To me helping others is on an individual basis. I am probably not one to lead a cause but I will help with someone's cause. To me being there for a friend who needs you is so important. And you are right it s sometimes most difficult to receive. Interesting topic and you covered it well. Voting up

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Thank you for sharing this inspiring hub Rolly. Glad you got through your rough patch. You are right it is a two way street. Great to help others and nice to have others help you. Sprinkle in a good dose of faith and take hold of God's hand and there is most anything you can do. Hugs and blessings from Riga. Passing this on.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
      Author

      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Morning Miss Leslie... I am reminded of the old saying "If it ain't broke don't fix it." The problem is though many fail to see their own broken lives till it is to late. "Na I am fine" last famous words before I hit the brink wall.

      We do need to stop and take a reality check once in a while, if not well reality will find you.

      I love this line you wrote: "I also believe that the more one personally endures - the more compassion and empathy one has."

      Well done Leslie and so very true. When you have been down there long enough you return with humility and wisdom you can carry into the next valley you walk into. Maybe along the way you reach out and help another before they slip into muck you were in.

      Hugs and love you right back...

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Morning to you drbj... Glad may ramblings have made a little sense out of it. Great to have you along and a blessing for us all.

      Hugs from Canada

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Ericdierker ... so very true. When we give of ourselves to another we do get the greatest of joy. Give enough and soon we are filled to overflowing.

      Hugs and Blessings from Canada

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      Mmmmm...Rolly - i am both humbled and flattered that something i wrote inspired something you wrote!

      I believe that the lower we fall in life..the harder the circumstances we are born into..the more we must survive - the higher we can eventually soar if we want it badly enough!

      i also believe that the more one personally endures - the more compassion and empathy one has..

      On the other hand - i've seen it go the other way as well, but - i prefer to think positive..

      so glad you survived your trials! i love who you are!

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi CrisSp... good to have you back home again, we have missed you dearly.

      This is but a small little tid bit of te past of many lessons well learned... smiles... there are many more still to come along in this life. We all have them you know and it is good to share them with others.

      Stay well and know you are loved... a ton of hugs heading your way.

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Billy... thanks for stopping by and yes I as well have been reminded of those who came along when they did, especially the Father above. Sometimes I think we do need to go through the valleys to appreciate the mountain tops...

      Blessings and Hugs to you and Bev from Canada

    • Rolly A Chabot profile image
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      Rolly A Chabot 4 years ago from Alberta Canada

      Hi Gus... good to see you and hear your voice here again. for those of us who have been there and done that it is something we never forget. It has a way of making us lok at things a bit different...

      Hugs from Canada

    • drbj profile image

      drbj and sherry 4 years ago from south Florida

      With this beautiful story, Rolly, you have just given all of us important knowledge as well as entertainment. Thank you.

    • Ericdierker profile image

      Eric Dierker 4 years ago from Spring Valley, CA. U.S.A.

      Wonderful. Have we ever had a better joy than when we truly helped someone? How could be be so selfish to deny that to another?

      Truly a wonderful hub.

    • CrisSp profile image

      CrisSp 4 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

      Oh Rolly, this is very inspiring and moving. Thank you so much for sharing your story with us.

      I love this line: "It is when we accept where we are in life and fill ourselves with thankfulness do we blossom like a flower on a sunny day."~

      You reminded me of the book I've read quite long ago by Mike Dooley, when he said, "There's no predicament that can't be turned into an advantage...no burden that cannot give you wings." So, spread your wings my friend and may you continue to be blessed and be a blessing to others.

      Love from the sky~

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      This is as important a message as we will read today. Well done my friend. Some of the guiding lights of my life were learned when things were darkest for me, and I thank God for those days.

      blessings coming your way from Olympia

      bill

    • GusTheRedneck profile image

      Gustave Kilthau 4 years ago from USA

      Hi Rolly ( Rolly A Chabot) -

      A meaningful article that many folks could read with great benefit to themselves. Nothing like an oatmeal and rice diet to help a person understand what everything is really all about...

      Gus :-)))