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Living with a Person with OCPD

Updated on September 9, 2015

Obsessed With Cleanness

Obsessed With Cleanness
Obsessed With Cleanness | Source


Unlike obsessive compulsive disorder (OCD), which is characterized by anxiety and involuntary thoughts and behaviors that are seen as unhealthy and unwanted, people whose inclinations to perfection and orderliness, stemming from obsessive compusive personality disorder (OCPD), are more accepted and desirable by society.

Spill of Coffee on the Table

Spill of Coffee on the Table
Spill of Coffee on the Table | Source

Living with Someone with OCPD

Sharing moments with a person who is obsessed with tidiness and organization is not too bad of an experience as long as you adhere to his/her almost tendencies to perfection.

The obsession for a routinely perfect life can be unbearable for those who follow an ordinary life where a spill on the table or a stain on the floor is not a motive to loose sanity and start screaming; however, showing a tendency to organization and tidiness is a human trait which can influence those who are living with a person with this disorder.

¨Juanito, clean the table! ¨ She would scream with a high tone of voice.

¨Ok! ¨ I answer hurriedly trying to prevent subsequent tantrums.

A wiping cloth swept the 16 or more square feet of table top. Every dirty invader was wiped out, until the table top shown impeccably clean. A smile of satisfaction spread over her face when she passed her sight over the now clean table and then she said;

Impeccably Clean Table

Impeccably Clean Table
Impeccably Clean Table | Source

Fear of Contamination with Germs (Germaphobia)

¨Would you like a cup of coffee? ¨ she uttered with a very sweet tone of voice.

¨Sure, I´d like one, ¨ I answered enthusiastically.

The coffee was served and a spoon, sugar substitute and cream were placed beside it. I grabbed the spoon and sank it on the cup, while she looked sideways suspiciously checking for some inconsistencies. If for some unwanted incident a spill occurred, she would certainly say;

¨Juanito, clean that immediately, I don´t want to see germs around¨

A wiping cloth was already placed near, in case of an unexpected event. Over time, I learned to keep the table exquisitely clean. That factor against me had been taken care of, but there were others coming which would soon had to be subjugated.


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Obsessed with Orderliness

¨Help me carry this basket to the laundry, your garments are inside, ¨ she uttered demandingly.

At the laundry, she would say;

¨Place enough detergent and fabric care into the washing machine; it´s important that you learn how to wash your own clothing, ¨ she would explain.

Once the washing assignment had been concluded, each of the clothing items had to be neatly arranged inside the basket; those which required clothing hooks had to be carefully hung on them and then all the load of garments carried to the house for subsequent organization on the closet.


Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD)

¨Lets go out to eat, ¨ she said.

Before I suggested the place and food, she would say;

¨Lets go to such restaurant¨

¨Not too bad of a choice, ¨ I would ponder.

Before getting into the car she gave me the keys and said;

¨You drive the car and open the passenger door for me, please, ¨

¨Sure, why not, ¨ I reflected.

At the restaurant;

¨Offer me a chair, a gentleman should offer a chair to a lady, ¨ she suggested trying to influence my inner feelings.

¨Ok! ¨ I answered convinced that she was using the right words at the right time and place.

The time spent at the restaurant was acceptable. It seemed as if she was doing a little pause in her usual way of addressing the issue of perfection and organization, until she exclaimed;

¨Juanito, don´t spill the drink on the table cloth¨

I had not spilled a single drop of liquid, but I think she just make that remark just in case.

Shoes | Source

Desirable Practice

One day, she proposed;

¨from now on, we are going to leave our shoes outside and use sandals inside the house. This will maintain the house clean and free of germs¨

¨That is not a bad idea, ¨ I pondered as I remembered having wanted to implement that measure some years earlier in life.

I helped her place shoe holders outside close to the main door and inside just passed the door. I felt strange the first time I left my shoes outside, but soon I realize that it was a good practice.

The positive outcome from a relation with a person with OCPD is that that person´s tendencies to perfection can teach you a lesson on how to be neat and tidy in your own life. You won´t really interfere with his/her tendencies and desires if you try to adhere to his/her life style.

They may seem like they have a bad temper and extremely strict in the way they talk but with a little patience, you will realize that living an almost perfectly neat and tidy life is not as bad or impossible as it seems.

Interesting Facts About OCPD

  • Obsessive compulsive personality disorder (OCPD) is characterized by extreme preoccupation with perfectionism, the need for orderliness and organization and strict control over situations and people in one´s life
  • Obsession with perfection can make people with OCPD inefficient at work
  • They experiment difficulty establishing close or intimate relations with others
  • They may find it hard to express their inner feelings
  • Social isolation may cause them anxiety and depression
  • OCPD and OCD may seem similar; however, they are different from one another
  • A person with OCPD believes that the way in which she/he approaches situations is the correct way
  • The exact origin of OCPD is unknown; however, genetics, environmental factors and early influences in life may be a cause


Types of
Types of Compulsions
Contamination Fears
Causing Harm on Accident
Ordering and Arranging
Causing Harm on Accident
Religious Obsessions
Orderliness Cleanness
Symmetry and Exactness
Washing and Cleanning

Obsessive Compulsive Personality Disorder (OCPD)


Submit a Comment

  • unvrso profile image

    Jose Juan Gutierrez 2 years ago from Mexico City

    Thanks! It took me some time to understand the disease, and only a day to write it.

  • shprd74 profile image

    Hari Prasad S 2 years ago from Bangalore

    well written. highly readable in understanding and tackling it.

    - hari

  • unvrso profile image

    Jose Juan Gutierrez 2 years ago from Mexico City

    Yes, indeed! Living with a person suffering from OCDP may be a difficult endeavor, but patience does help a lot.

  • MPG Narratives profile image

    Marie Giunta 2 years ago from Sydney, Australia

    Being clean and tidy is one thing, but being obsessed about cleaning is another. People who suffer OCPD can be obsessive about many things not just cleaning, their need for perfection affects all parts of their lives, including relationships and employment. This is a good article on how to deal with a partner or parent with OCPD. Being patient does help.

  • unvrso profile image

    Jose Juan Gutierrez 2 years ago from Mexico City

    I´m sure that if he analyzes the situation, he will discover the exact source of his illness. Tanks for your comment, peachpurple.

  • peachpurple profile image

    peachy 2 years ago from Home Sweet Home

    my bro had this illness after he was fired by his employer. I don't understand why.

  • unvrso profile image

    Jose Juan Gutierrez 2 years ago from Mexico City

    Thanks for reading this hub. Aiming to perfection may not seem good for those who do not practice it, but to me, aiming to perfection is the ideal thing to do.

  • CrisSp profile image

    CrisSp 2 years ago from Sky Is The Limit Adventure

    Well, my daughter told me I have OCD but now after reading your hub, it could be more of the OCPD. :) Yes, I admit always aiming to perfection, which is not always good but I'm trying to be more lenient now as I grow older. And, cleanliness...well, we have a saying that it's next to Godliness. So, please leave the shoes outside and thank you.

    Good read.