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Looking For My Father

Updated on March 16, 2014

I had an emptiness in my life, a void, a void no one could fill.

It wasn't something you could make go away,

and it couldn't be cured with a pill .

I grew up without my father, got married, and had a son named Cole.

He also has grown up searching for something.

Something that was missing from my soul.

 

I moved on with my life with only a father I knew at a glance.

I tried to understand why others had fathers, and I hadn't had the chance.

 

As time went on after visit to visit, I got to know my Dad.

As he started failing, I could feel his love beaming.

And, that made me feel good, but it also made me feel sad.

 

I had another son, and his name is Johnny.

He is very lucky; he knows and worships his Dad.

He is very fortunate for I know he will never be sad.

I sometimes sit and watch his father hug and squeeze him so very tight.

It's something, I wish I could have had when I see him get tucked in at night.

 

I've had visits with my Dad while he was ill, and I could see in his eyes the remorse.

I just wanted to hug and kiss him, and tell him to keep fighting for his life with a force.

 

It doesn't make me sad anymore. I have my hubby, my Cole, my Johnny, and I found my father.

I feel like a lucky wife, a lucky mother, and a very fortunate daughter.

So my prayer for my father is for God to let him walk in the beauty, and let his eyes behold the red and purple sunset.

I thank God, at last, I got to know him, and I can not say anymore, I'm looking for my father.

I can say my father and I have met.

 

I've watched my father with this dreaded illness, which tore him apart.

I've also watched a very brave man take a stand.

I, also, know from the bottom of my heart, I need not look for my father anymore, for his is in the Palm of God's Hand.

I love you, Dad.

I know my father's journey here is done, but to him the journey has just begun.

May he rest in peace

Comments

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  • proudmamma profile imageAUTHOR

    proudmamma 

    6 years ago

    The love of both parents is all any child wants in their life unknown spy....... it truly is a lonely and lost feeling. It seems so unfair... however, unfortunately their are many of us who have grown up in the same fashion. The only thing we can do is be the best we can be with children of our own. We have to make the best of what we have. Thank you so much for taking time to read my hub. I wish only the best for you... God Bless!

  • unknown spy profile image

    Not Found 

    6 years ago from Neverland - where children never grow up.

    Oh my..Proudmamma..

    i thought i was reading my own poem.. i grew up without a father too..i never knew him, never seen his picture. and your poem exactly tells what im feeling, what my heart is asking "I tried to understand why others had fathers, and I hadn't had the chance."

    I always cry silently because I've seen my other friends happy with their dads.

    im still halfway on your poem, im still young and never been married..but i promised myself that i'll give my children the life I never had..a complete family. happy and contented. i wish everything will be fine.

    thank you for sharing..makes me feel sad but happy too that you have come to know your dad and spend time with him..

    God bless!

  • proudmamma profile imageAUTHOR

    proudmamma 

    6 years ago

    Thank you Crystal Tink B for the comment. And thanks for taking time to read my hub.... God Bless!

  • Crystal Tink B profile image

    Crystal Tink B 

    6 years ago from KY

    Beautiful!

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