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Maria, a Poem of Regret

Updated on June 2, 2013
My sister Maria. Born October 21, 1955 died  November 13, 2001
My sister Maria. Born October 21, 1955 died November 13, 2001

My beautiful sister, a generous friend

A responsible sister, we call our small mother

Always there reminding us 'mind your manners!'

a loving but bossy sister named Maria.

I used to envy her looks, brain, and her being mom's favorite.

I used to hate her being the eldest, hence should be followed and respected.

I used to compete and try to prove to her am more brainy and so should be the leader.

I used to reject her advances of friendship, care, and love.

Dear sister, if you can hear my soul, please forgive me.

I regret for not saying Thank You for paying my tuition fees and other bills.

I regret for not saying I Miss You during those years you cannot come home.

I regret for not saying I Care, knowing it means a lot to you.

I regret for not saying I Love You while you can still hear me.

Most of all, I regret for seeing you more as a rival rather than a sister.


From the last page of her journal:

Life is a continuum. You are born into this world with nothing and you go out with nothing. It has been a hard struggle for me being sick. I was thinking and preparing for retirement not knowing that the Primal Spirit had other plans for me. I have lung cancer and until now it seems to be just a nightmare that I can wake from but I have realized that this thing is for real. The tumor cells have invaded my brain and liver. It is growing so fast that I'm scared that I won't be able to go home as planned. Maria.

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Maria was a nurse in Cabrini Hospital, New York for more than 2 decades. Three weeks after she came home, she died.






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    • TENKAY profile image
      Author

      TENKAY 5 years ago from Philippines

      BlossomSB thanks for reading and commenting. I learned a lot from my sister's agony before her death and from the family's grief after her death. One of which is, always show love, care and appreciation to people who means a lot to you. Show it and say it.

    • profile image

      Cora 5 years ago

      My dear friend, yes you are not very vocal to sensitive things but.....we can hear from your heart all your good deeds and humbleness and the compassion within.....I always hear from you before that she was your idol, best friend, and your everything. That moment you say your sis is better than mine, but I say my sis is the best....I learn from this, I will now always say to my sisters I Love You !!!

    • BlossomSB profile image

      Bronwen Scott-Branagan 5 years ago from Victoria, Australia

      A touching story. It's so important to tell people we love things before it's too late to do so.

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