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My Friend Leslie

Updated on December 29, 2012
PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

Justin W. Price, AKA PDXKaraokeGuy, is a freelance writer, blogger, and award-nominated author based out of Juneau, Alaska.

Heavily Revised 5/8/2012

In Early January of 2009, I was at the Ambassador in the Hollywood District of Portland, Oregon performing some karaoke. I had just done Rick Astley's "Never Gonna Give You Up. (Which I owned, by the way. Everyone was sufficiently Rick Rolled.) I was taking my bow and walking back over to my friends when this blonde girl grabbed my hand and walked me over to the bench where she and her friend were sitting.

This was a new experience for me. I was not used to being led by the hand, especially not by strangers, especially not by strange women. She guided me over to her booth where her friend, who was significantly more attractive then she was, was sitting.

Once at the booth, she told me her name was Leslie and that she loved me "right now" and that she was from Las Vegas in town for work.

I told her I used to live in Vegasand asked her what she did for a living. She told me she worked for an airline. I told her I was a teacher.

This was pretty much a lie.I was also in no way attracted to this girl at all. I was just trying to be polite.

She wasn't ugly. She seemed like she took good care of herself. She smelled nice. Yet, there was just something about her that I found unappealing. Perhaps it was her boldness. Perhaps it was her wonton availability. It kind of reeked of desperation.

She asked me if I wanted to hang out sometime and I said sheepishly "sure" but made no effort to get her number- nor give her mine. She kept staring at me and I did my best not to look directly at her face because I was afraid she would kiss me. She kept telling me that she thought I was really cute and she asked me if I thought she was.

What I should have done was lie and say I had a girlfriend. Or that I was gay. Or married. Something. Anything! But, I wasn't thinking. I said simply, not wanting to hurt her feelings, that "I'm not really attracted to you- but, I generally am not attracted to blondes.”

This was probably the absolute wrong thing to say, and had the exact opposite effect on her from what I intended.

At that point, my wonderful friends Josh the Terrible and Niira Danger- who were my backup plan to leave Leslie's side- left the bar, and thus left me to be slaughtered.

All the while, Leslie was rubbing my thighs and inching closer to me. At one point, she even put her hand on my ass. When I looked down at her hand, she quickly moved it away, but was still seemingly undeterred. She said I didn't have to sit and talk with her if I didn't want too, again telling me she thought I was cute and asking me if I thought she was.

I told her “I really admire your forwardness but I’m not used to that, and it makes me uncomfortable.”

She kept touching me, and I started to feel my hormones unwillingly gathering to attention. I had no physical attraction to this girl, yet my testosterone was coming dangerously close to clouding my judgment. It didn't help that I was somewhat lonely and was mildly on the prowl for a mate. Could be worse things than going home with a crazy girl, I thought.

She said she wanted to go bowling with me at this 24 hour bowling alley she found, though I strongly suspected she had a different game in mind. I do love bowling, though, and I have to admit that this idea was tempting. Meanwhile, her face kept inching closer to mine and her lips came dangerously close to mine. I could smell her cherry lip balm.

Finally, I freed myself from her talons and fled like Joseph from Potiphar’s wife. I almost felt bad for the girl- she looked so sad when I left. She also did not smell in the least like alcohol so she was either was just naturally bold. Or, and I particularly like this option, she just found me totally irresistible.

Of course, this could have also just been a dare, a bet of some kind, and if it was, I hope she won it. That kind of forwardness deserves a reward.

To my friend Leslie: Good luck in Vegas- or wherever you are.

Thanks for Reading.

PDXKaraokeGuy, also known as Justin W. Price, is an author with Sweatshoppe Publications, which will soon re-release his poetry collection, Digging to China. Additionally, the managing editor at eFiction horror and The New Bridge online newspaper.. Husband to Andrea, father to two dogs. fan. tattooed. He is am amateur theologian with a rabid sweet tooth. He resides in a suburb of Portland, Oregon.He has a poetry book available for Amazon Kindle, and also maintains a blog, FirstBlog. His work has been featured in the Crisis Chronicles, efiction Magazine, The Hellroaring Review, the Bellwether Review, eFiction Humor, and the Rusty Nail. Please visit his profile page for more information. Thanks!


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    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thanks Kimmie... running is usually the right choice. I hope you had a merry Christmas and please have a happy new year!

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 5 years ago

      Hi Justin I still like this story and very funny..and my thoughts are still the same...Run Run Run! Lol

      Oh Merry Christmas!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 5 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      mymindseye, I can appreciate boldness... just not obnoxiousness :-)

    • My Minds Eye53 profile image

      My Minds Eye53 5 years ago from Tennessee

      I have asked men out before, but not like this girl. It's hard to ask a guy out but a couple of them actually said yes!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thanks Brittany. I'm glad you enjoyed it!

    • profile image

      Brittany!! 6 years ago

      This Is Good story!!!

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Susan, thank you. She's not the only one who's happy :-)

      Sunnie, I do appreciate a girl who doesn't play games. men are lousy at picking up on clues. but something about her was off...

      Thanks, Till, though my wife is named Andrea. Nicky was the fella that introduced us :-) I'm glad you enjoyed this!

      Audrey, I certainly am, though I'm not sure if Chuck Taylor's count as running shoes :-)

      Thanks ya'll for reading!

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 6 years ago from California

      I am thinking you are glad that you had your running shoes on that night! Good read Justin!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 6 years ago from New York

      You know no one needs to tell you you made right choices. Imagine being saddled with Leslie when your lovely Nicky came along? Of course Leslie still would've been history but it could've been 'awkward.' Cute hub.

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 6 years ago

      PDX all I have to say is I am glad you let your mind do some thinking for my opnion (of course I am 51 and a grandma) would think this little girl was way too forward and had played that game many times..but when you are young, lonely, and A is so easy to be you did the right thing by fast my sweet


    • Just Ask Susan profile image

      Susan Zutautas 6 years ago from Ontario, Canada

      I really enjoy how you tell a story. I'm sure your lovely wife is happy that you fled the scene or you may not have met her :)

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      molo, I used to karaoke a lot when I was single. not so much now. I'm glad I ran. she had crazy written all over her. Thanks for reading and commenting!

    • molometer profile image

      molometer 6 years ago from United Kingdom

      Hi Justin,

      You seem to live in the karaoke bar,lol and this little chickadee sounds a little forward to my sensibilities. I think you made a wise choice in doing a runner.

      Good read Justin on life's little oddities.

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thanks Sky! I will say, the bowling offer was very tempting, as I do love bowling Oh so very much

    • Sky9106 profile image

      Sky9106 6 years ago from A beautiful place on earth.

      Actually you did pretty well, should be proud.

      The only time you fell was when you were thinking about going bowling because you to shared that passion, but you scored highly with life .Quick and correct decision.

      Even when one gives in to a moment, they are still expected to be in charge of the next. You did yourself a favor, got a good story out of it, and lived to tell the tale.


    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      Thanks u Chris! I appreciate the read!

    • chrisam01 profile image

      chrisam01 6 years ago from Los Angeles, California, USA

      I love this story! Entertaining and captivating! Thanks for sharing :)

    • PDXKaraokeGuy profile image

      Justin W Price 6 years ago from Juneau, Alaska

      thank you Naturalsolutions. Thanks for stopping by

    • profile image

      naturalsolutions 6 years ago

      Wonderful story, thumbs up to you PDXkaraoke ;)

      Thsi story tells a lot of things in life and I believe, everyone should know this.

    • profile image

      Monchichi 7 years ago

      As for me, I like blondes.....hehehe.