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My Life Without A Smartphone.

Updated on November 19, 2016

So shiny.....

Apparently these are called Smartphones.
Apparently these are called Smartphones.

I have a confession to make. I haven't really been "up-to-date" with the latest gadgets and gizmos. In fact, I haven't been up-to-date with the changing time at all. For instance, today I'm still insistent on using paper money when everyone else is using smartphones with NFC (Not some Fried Chicken) technology and apps like Google Wallet to pay for their purchases. I still use paper notebooks and pens/pencils in a world where students and classrooms both are going electronic and Tablets and Phablets alike are taking over quickly. When people are buying and selling goods on the go, I still have to wait till I get home to do so. Why does that happen? Why should I suffer? Why do I actually suffer?

Yet I'm still not Intellectual.
Yet I'm still not Intellectual. | Source

No offence meant.

Maybe it was just an accident.
Maybe it was just an accident. | Source

The answer? simple. I don't own a Smartphone. Please, calm down folks. I know some of you would be absolutely cursing me right now. Others have probably grabbed their Pitchforks by now, ready to burn me alive for this unforgivable sin. Please, try to understand. Let me tell you something about my history with mobile phones first. My first ever mobile phone was, of course the great Nokia 3310. To be honest I've always wondered how come it was never labelled as a Weapon of Mass Destruction (WMD). I mean, you could literally break a floor with one and still that phone would live to tell the tale. Other the other hand, your survival would be a bit sceptical if you ask me.

The next in line was another nice entry by the same company, Nokia 1100. Loved the torch feature though. Really helpful in a country where there's very little light pollution. P.S. We don't have any Electricity. Whatever of this "entity" we have, our Politicians make sure none gets wasted by our hands. Coming back to the topic, the next few mobiles were mostly my Parents' old ones that they had ceased to use. This was mostly before 2010. Now enter 2010, and Nokia throws out a handful of nice models. One one them, was the Nokia C3-00, with the promise of Social Networking capability. Mind you, one of the first ones to do so. This was roughly also the time of the Samsung Galaxy Y Smartphone.

Wonder if those people shown are real contacts.
Wonder if those people shown are real contacts. | Source

Now believe it or not , but a few people told me to go for an Android. You know what my reply was? "Oh come on man. Android is shit. Its a complete failure. Its not gonna be successful" and similar statements I was bound to regret very, very soon. Please hold your fire. There's more to the story. I can already see people with Fire Torches and Pitchforks outside my house. But please, you must listen. So I did what I probably could have "not" done, I went for the Nokia C3-00. But in my defence, Nokia always has had that "reliability" factor we're so found of. I mean once my father was doing some repair work on our roof. His Nokia 2100 fell from there, and two stories below onto the ground (the roof was on the second floor). He picked it up, put the battery back in and guess what? It worked! See what I mean?

Anyway, so I went to the market with my father and we finally got my mobile phone. Everyone was congratulating me and I was soaring high up in the clouds. My first ever mobile phone, that I had bought with my own money, money I had saved for so long. It wasn't long before I really fell in love with my mobile. I could now access Facebook on the go, created a Twitter account and browse the Internet any time and anywhere. I them began compiling my music playlist, got a 2gb Memory Card and the fun really began. The 2.4 inch screen and 2 Mega pixel camera was a blast back then. Fast forward to 2011 and Android devices saw a boom. The sales began to pour in and Samsung played the cards right. We're talking about the Galaxy S series and the Galaxy Note series. People went crazy. And with that, began what I like to call, the "Front Camera Invasion". Yes, if people weren't retard enough (with all due respect), in the words of the great Robert Downey Jr, they went "full retard".

Never go full retard.
Never go full retard. | Source
Seriously. If he took part in the Olympics, he'd definitely win a Gold Medal or two.
Seriously. If he took part in the Olympics, he'd definitely win a Gold Medal or two. | Source
Do they look violent to you?
Do they look violent to you? | Source

But I didn't care, since I had a new recently bought phone. Who cares? They can all go burn in hell. I've got a Nokia. Chicks dig Nokia. Selfies are stupid. Who the hell wants to snap their own picture? That's crazy. But then I began to realize something. People around me were beginning to buy these so called "Smartphones". At first it was my class fellows. Then my friends, family members, neighbours and so on. A time came when everyone I knew was switching to these smartphones. I felt kind of, left out. And what really killed it was Temple Run. Oh and don't even get me started. I mean there's a guy running around because he's pissed off a group of Gorillas. Seriously, why would you piss of a group of Gorillas? That doesn't even make sense. His shenanigans are giving the Gorillaz a bad name. Don't ever do that.

So fast forward and five years later in 2015, I'm pretty much stuck with the same mobile phone that I bought in 2010, the Nokia C3-00. And as much as I want to get rid of it, I can't. Primarily because I don't have a, wait for it........... Smartphone. And in some ways I am to blame myself. Firstly, I don't really have a job. Partly because I never looked for one and partly because in our part of the world, teenagers are not exactly encouraged to seek employment till their studies are over. So in a sense I'm dependent on my parents till my studies are completed and I settle down. So its kind of difficult saving money for the things you have to buy with your own cash. Resultantly, even though there are thousands of smartphones out there, not one is in my pocket. Now that's got to come with some drawbacks right?

My Nokia C3-00 in its current state.

Probably regretting its choice of staying with me right now.
Probably regretting its choice of staying with me right now.
  1. A big issue is proper access to information. Sure, I can access Wikipedia on my Nokia C3-00 without any issues. But keep in mind it has a 2.4 inches screen. 2.4 inches! That's small, in fact, tiny by todays standards. Imagine reading on that. It near impossible to read long paragraphs on such a small, limited space. It really puts a lot of strain on ones eyes.
  2. Probably the biggest issue is Messaging, especially when it comes to Messaging apps like Whatsapp, Viber, Snapchat etc. Here's the thing, a smartphone, has the option to properly turn off an app once you exit it. For instance in the Android Operating System, you goto Task Manager, and swipe the app you want to close. Old mobile phones like my Nokia C3-00 don't come with that option. Instead, when you exit an app, it closes down. But the apps internet connection remains active. So if I were to close it, it would still consume my Wi-Fi. Turn that off, and it automatically switches to GPRS Data. My mobile phone balance is very precious to me, so I don't really like to use GPRS Data for Internet connectivity. Instead, I prefer Wi-Fi. Now there are some hacks to prevent it. I tried a few, but none worked for me. Resultantly, I'm left out of fun instant group chats. Hangout discussions? Plans for tours? I get none of that on time. And when I do, its usually at the last minute. My friends are like, "Okay so did we leave someone out? No. Alright. Wait, did you tell Hamza? He doesn't have Whatsapp. Oh shit I forgot. Call him and tell him!" Now just imagine for a minute, that its you instead of me, and you'll realize how it feels like. You've already seen what condition my mobile is currently in. Try texting with it. *starts crying. On the bright side, it did help me memorise the qwerty layout though.
  3. I'll be completely honest with you, I love Memes. I mean who doesn't? If there's anyone or anything else I love apart from my non existent girlfriend, its probably Memes. Mark my words people, no matter how hard you try, you just can't make Memes on a feature phone! Period! Smartphone? Yes. Feature phone? No. Absolutely no! Been there. Done that. Doesn't happen. End of story.

Apart from a Computer.

Requiring a smartphone to make memes was probably the biggest lie told to humanity.
Requiring a smartphone to make memes was probably the biggest lie told to humanity.

Similarly, there are other things I can't openly do with my feature phone. Already in the beginning, I told you how I can't write notes in digital format, make payments and do online shopping from the comfort of my home. I can't play good games on my mobile, properly watch YouTube videos . I like photography and making awesome videos. But I just can't make videos and take pictures with a two mega pixel non flash mobile camera. Half of the time the light is too low and at other times the image is blurry as hell. Kind of feels like a cheap home-made leaked video you know what I'm saying?

But pity me no more, as not having a Smartphone has its perks as well:

Ah yes. The good ol' selfies. Making people go full retard since the "Front Camera Invasion". These days, people will do anything, I repeat anything, just to get a "kewl" selfie. Climbing on top of buildings, sitting beside a freaking Tiger, getting a selfie and then getting mugged and harassed by the same Tiger. #YOLO #SWAG Seriously, whats got into us? I wouldn't be surprised if Heath Ledger's "When the chips are down these, uh, civilized people? They'll eat each other" prediction actually turns out to be true.

No please, go ahead. I insist.
No please, go ahead. I insist. | Source

Now Instagram is not necessarily a bad thing. I don't have anything personal against it. But please, stop stalking your crush. She doesn't want you. She has probably told you a hundred times before to leave her alone. She doesn't like you at all. Use Instagram for something constructive, like helping people in need, sharing their sorrow with the rest of the world or sharing the beauty of nature. How you use it is on you, so use it wisely, please!

Unnecessary Check ins:
Every time I'm hanging out with someone, they're sure to bring out their phone and upload a status with a check in of our whereabouts. Now I don't have an issue with someone doing so, but if someone is planning to kill or kidnap me, I sure as hell wouldn't want them to find out where I am just by reading my or someone else's Status or Tweet. The world is not a safe place anymore people. If someone can hang dildos from power lines in Portland, then believe me anything can happen anywhere in the world. And since I don't have instant access to Facebook or Twitter every time I go out, I find it better not having a Smartphone. These Selfies and Check ins are like a disease, an addiction and a contagious one. Once you're infected, you just can't stop.

The day it rained Dildos. Look how neatly tied they are.
The day it rained Dildos. Look how neatly tied they are. | Source
I am after all, a human being.
I am after all, a human being. | Source

Now to be completely honest with you guys, I've been planning to get a new mobile phone lately. Yes, a Smartphone. I have needs too you know. So I've saving up cash for sometime now and have finally reached my target, almost that is. I had a few options, but I decided to go with a Huawei model. There are somethings you just instantly fall in love with. And this phone is exactly one of those things. The moment I saw it, I knew it had my name written on it. Now keeping that in mind, very soon, you'll be seeing another post by me, called "My Life With A Smartphone". I will spend sometime with my mobile, doing everything part of the "trend" these days and then you'll get to hear that side of the story as well. I won't tell you what model it is, you'll have to find that out in "My Life With A Smartphone". So make sure you're there to read it as well.

Finally I hope you enjoyed what I had to offer. Please do drop some feedback so I might know how my first ever piece on hubpages was and what can be done in the future and make any possible improvements. Do follow if you feel like its worth it. And if you have any ideas for me to write upon in the future, please feel free to share them in the comments. You can even e-mail me at or Tweet me @hamzabutt93 with your ideas. I'll be happy to write on them. And no spam please. In the mean time, stay safe, stay healthy, take care of yourself, your loved ones and everyone around you. Goodbye and have a nice day.


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