My Wedding Fear!
Oh my goshk, it’s that time of year,
The time of year I awkwardly fear.
Summertime… weddings are here!
Don’t get me wrong I love a wedding
Let me explain why I am fretting!
I’m not so old, I wouldn’t say
Just turned 31, the 24th of May.
I know, we ladies don’t reveal our ages
But I’m an open book and share my pages.
I’ve really got nothing to hide,
I’ll tell you who I am inside!
But that’s really not what this is about
I’ve got a point, though, I’m sure you’re in doubt!
Where was I? Oh yes, weddings indeed!
It’s all about dancing, now follow my lead!
I know what I’m doing, you’re safe with me.
I can show you as step or two, maybe three!
Actually, I just love to dance
I do it whenever I find the chance!
I can Mash Potato, I can do the Twist
Though I know those are a bit old for my list!
Old, maybe so, but I will not stop
Till I tell you about the Bunny Hop
I can do the Swim and the Jitterbug too
The Charelston as well, just to name a few.
For almost as long as I’ve been alive
Thanks to Grease, I can even Hand Jive!
I can do some more and here’s something cool
Line and Square Dancing were taught in my school!
I live in New York, where there’s not hay, but grass
Why, you suppose that was taught in my Gym Class?
Doesn’t really matter, another notch in my belt
Just added to my skills, that’s how I felt!
Perhaps it’s cheesy but okie dokie,
I’ll admit I can do one mean Hokey Pokey!
I’m unstoppable I tell you; fast forward a bit
I can do the Running Man and the Roger Rabbit!
The Chicken Wing and the Chicken Dance
Both, very different and done best in pants!
I can Raise the Roof and Drop it Like it’s Hot
Though I tell my husband ‘Honey, I swear, I am not!’
The Tootsie Roll and Butterfly
Both require a nice strong thigh.
After a margarita or two
The Worm, I can do!
Sometimes the Robot, but always Churn Butter
When DJ comes calling, I do not stutter!
‘Yes, I can do the Macarena today!’
‘Course at some point, the YMCA!
Technically, I could bump and grind
Though the groom seems to like it, I think his wife minds!
So I’ll stick to the dances that don’t get me in trouble
And I’ll tell the bartender, ‘No thanks ‘bout that double’!
When at a wedding, I just wanna have fun
But there is one dance that just can’t be done!
What is the secret to the Electric Slide?
Always hoped I’d learn it before I died!
I’m starting to worry, way down deep in my soul
Tired of looking like I’m casting a darn fishing pole!