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My alcoholism in verse

Updated on April 30, 2014

If life was a taxi ride


If life was like a taxi ride

Could I afford the fare?

“Hey driver how much to go to hell and back?

I’ll know when I get there.”


“I’ll take your fare” the driver said,

“Just buckle up inside.

The road to hell is an easy one,

Sit back enjoy the ride.”


Those feelings born of alcohol,

Like an illicit stolen kiss.

All your fears just disappear,

It’s wonderful its bliss.


My journey starts off nice and slow

I sit back, enjoy the view.

Is this the life you want to lead?

You feckin bet I do.


The selfishness of alcohol

I couldn’t give a toss.

I’ve started on this journey

And I’m the feckin boss.


Put the pedal to the metal

And open up the gas.

The journey now is speeding up

Don’t let the moment pass.


Intoxicate and fornicate,

All I do is take.

I do not see the wreckage

Lying in my wake.


We must be getting closer now

The journeys loosing fun.

I’m starting now to feel the guilt,

Of the damage I have done.


The taxi stops the driver says

“I’ve a choice for you to make.

We’re coming to a crossroad,

Which road shall we take?


One of them is a one way street

Where heartache lies in wait.

The other ones a rougher ride,

But you decide your fate.”

I chose the rough ride, and rough does not begin to describe how hard a road I made it for myself.

The secret is, as with the analogy about the train. Once you get off do not jump back on.

Leave the train in the station ODAAT




The voices in my head

I wish I could remember

When the voices came to stay.

Maybe then I’d find the strength

To make them go away.


This is what I asked myself

in an alcoholic haze.

My heads so screwed

I feel like I am living in a maze.


I haven’t had an easy life,

Or traumas for to find.

I tried so hard to bury them

In the recess of my mind.


Oh my beloved vodka,

I thought you where my friend.

You always made me feel so good,

and all my problems end.


But now you have the power,

You’ve got inside my brain.

I know that you are killing me,

But still I can’t abstain.


I know you brought the voices,

To delve into my past.

To make me feel I needed you,

To make the moment last


I’ve tried so many times

For you to set me free.

But every time I think I’ve won

You get your hold on me.


I am starting to get tired

Of fighting all my life.

I want to win the love back

Of my family and my wife.


I’m drunk again,you,ve won again

You’ll never let me free.

I think I know the answer lies

Between my god and me.


I’m crying now, I want to die

I lie down in the rain.

I pray to god to let me sleep

And finally stop the pain.


I hear a voice, I Recognise

And someone’s shaking me.

My wife came out to find me

It must have meant to be.


I cry all night, we talk all night

I tell her all my fears.

She says that she will help me

And wipes away my tears.


I’m now on medication

I might be all my life.

I know I have to do this

To keep my lovely wife.


Oh vodka you can’t hurt me

I’ve got you on the rack.

As long as I just take my meds

You won’t be coming back.




The drunken bum in me


As xmas time approaches

and excitements there to see.

It,s now I have to keep a watch,

on the drunken bum in me.

.............................................

I,d love to have that festive drink

That makes life so carefree.

But I have to keep the lid upon

The drunken bum in me.

..........................................

The innocence of children

So pure and sweet to see.

This it what goes through my mind

With my grandson on my knee,

.................................................

Unlike my own three children

And my wife how stood by me.

I pray to god he never sees

the drunken bum in me.

.......................................

I know this might seem moody

it isn,t meant to be,

for one thing that I cherish

is my new sobriety.

............................................

I know if I just take my time

and stay each day liquor free.

I CAN keep the lid upon

the drunken bum in me





Naw am aff it


The clock strikes 12, and the bells still ring

To welcome the New Year.

It won’t be long until I hear

The words that I most fear.

Gawn yil hiv a dram?

I’ll answer

Naw am aff it.

My first foot’s knocking at the door

A bottle in his hand.

I know he’s going to say the words

I wish I could get banned.

Gawn yil hiv a dram?

I’ll answer

Naw am aff it

This year I’ll keep some friends around,

Ones that know the score.

And when that fateful question comes

It won’t be like before.

Gawn yil hiv a dram?

I’ll answer.

Naw am aff it

I have to keep more focused

At the party time of year.

So when the questions put to me

My answer is quite clear.

Gawn yil hiv a dram?

I’ll answer

Naw am aff it

Now New Year’s Day is over,

It’s back to like before.

I,ll keep the same clear answer

For the other three six four.

Gawn yil hiv a dram?

I’ll answer.

Naw am aff it

A happy and prosperous New Year to everyone who reads this.

And to my fellow sufferers,ODAT the answers Naw am aff it.




End in tears


Why did I have to lift that glass,

and try to have another bash.

I should have known it would only end in tears.


The grandkids that I think about,

to see them again is now in doubt.

I should have known it would only end in tears.


I pace about this empty room,

the shakes the sweats the gloom and doom.

I should have known it would only end in tears.


I am scared to try and shut my eyes,

the demons will then magnify

I should have known it would only end in tears.


Tomorrow I can take my med,

And get some help to square my head.

I should have known it would only end in tears

Comments

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    • snerfu profile image

      Vivian Sudhir 

      4 years ago from Madurai, India

      Good easy rhythm and lovely rhyming words give this poem the enchantment one longs for but does not find in many other works. I liked it very much.

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