My own experience with being DID and the Family who cares for you
My own experience with being DID and the Family who Cares for you
“My own experience with being DID and the family who cares for you” Authored by Monica Ortega
Being DID has been a living hell for me. First, I had to admit that I truly had issue’s and doing my best to hide it from everyone, which was impossible and pretend I was ‘normal’ was a lie.
I just simply quit school in the seventh grade after switching and committing a crime as a youth not even knowing I committed this crime until it was explained to me in a juvenile detention center. Which I still denied, even with evidence that clearly portrayed me as the criminal. After this incident my mom had been divorced and was heavily into drugs and the drug lord scene. My mom was not there for us as teens and she was very suicidal much of the time. After much drug use and overdose it had caused an aneurysm in her brain that had almost left her a vegetable. She did survive, but was gravely disabled leaving me no choice but to stay out of school and care for her. I was able to nurse her back to health only to have her at my age of 15 go back to the streets and drugs. Which killed me mentally where for the first time, I also tried to commit suicide, not being aware of what happened because I had switched.
Dissociation is when I have done something as another personality and have lost time, not knowing time has passed, minutes, hours, or even days at a time. By this time I had met my foster family and was adopted by my adopted family that tried really hard to give me a normal life. Unfortunately, they were not fully aware of my abuse or conditions until later on in life. I tried so hard to pretend nothing was wrong and forget about my past. By this time step-died killed himself by being intoxicated riding his Harley crashing and being killed instantly, felt no remorse for him what-so-ever. Being adopted was a good thing for me, but my family just could not understand my behaviors and angry outburst where I would hurt myself or others not being aware. Being that my foster family and adopted family was of clergy they just assumed I had sinful issue’s that needed to be dealt with through the church. So, they tried not realizing, that I had mental issue’s that needed years and years of therapy and medications.
By the time I was finally diagnosed my family and friends just gave up on me in frustration, which by the way hurts. That’s why I write what I have written. It is not easy taking care of family with mental disorders it is the hardest and most challenging thing to have to do for that loved one. I know, I have been through it with my mother who did end up committing suicide. Now I am doing what I can to be strong and deal with my disorders and take care of my family now.
I am DID, bipolar, and have PTSD and deal with major depressive disorder due to my past and present situations that can add onto my current disorders. I am just hear to say that it is so hard to not get frustrated with family and loved ones with mental disorders, but please, please I can understand how you feel coming from a patient’s point of view and a family of the loved one’s point of view. Please, sometimes it seems impossible but it truly is not, your loved one need’s to feel safe, secure and they need to know that no matter what, you are never, going to abandon them no matter how hard it gets. Remember, we never asked to have this life of abuse, we never asked to be this way and though we don’t understand the misfortunes life brings we all need someone who will be there not matter how great the cost stick by each other’s side through thick and thin with love being the glue that holds your family together. Until next time…