NO FEAR - What Would You Do?
Way Back When.....
I remember one of the first times I felt extreme fear. Atleast if I had many "fears" before that like most kids do (like bad dreams, scary parents and horror movies) I don't remember many details! I remember that time when I was about ten years old and my mind went "wild with thoughts" and I created an adventure in about 5 minutes! It was easy....the setting, the location, the person and his strange attire and odd sandals, the big hunting knife that he carried in some sort of hip holder. It was perfect for a book titled "Little Kid Gets Slayed In Hollywood By Bad Man in Beard and a Turban" Part One...
I started to hyperventilate and before I knew it I created a VERY scary story and my little sister no longer wanted to walk to school with me! I terrified her and from that moment on, we always ran quickly by this particular house which we had to pass by every single morning. The feeling was intense and I braced myself each and every time. My sister would grab hold of me tightly since I was much bigger then her and brave. Atleast she thought so cause I had on such a brave face (I'm such a good actress)! It was classic when I think of it. I scared the CRAP out of both of us!!!! The more my imagination started to roll, the more freaked out I got! It just goes to show you how powerful our minds are!!! Just think of all the situations that we may have made "worse" at any given moment in time. I know I am guilty of it and I know many others are too. How about you?
The point is FEAR plays an important role in everything we do. The choices we make, the people we have friendships with, the intimate romantic relationships we choose or not choose to have. I know that FEAR can also turn to a sort of paranoid state. I have been there too where I make things a lot worse then they actually are. I'm not talking about important personal matters only. I'm also talking about silly things that are not important at all! Like I create things in my mind sometimes and before I know it, the time has passed and I have missed a really good opportunity. It's like I work my way into a cave sometimes.
I asked myself this question today for the hundredth time..."If You Had No Fear, What Would You Do?" I go into a sort of "release of information" that I learned from a "life coach" many years ago and write down various things I would do....like "travel more, live abroad, perform more in Europe, go on an adventure, finish all the projects I have been developing for television, start shooting for magazines again, FINALLY give into a record label that has been hassling me for years, learn "Russian and French," and I could write down a million other things to pursue......THEN I say "See? You are doing most of these things already!!!!!! But the point is YES I am doing quite a few of these things and I am really VERY impatient! I know I need to follow through and bring these things to some sort of final stage where I'm going to get to the next level....
Did I tell you that I still have not spent three consecutive nights in the bath tub REALLY thinking about what I want to do in my life? And my life coach told me to do this in 2004?
So I go on with my life doing a hundred different things and then.....IT HAPPENS.....MY MIND STARTS PLAYING TRICKS ON ME! And somehow before I know it, I talk myself out of it!!!!!!!! I never fully succeed though and I still finish projects and get paid for them. Thank God!!! BUT, if I didn't go through this "Create a scary story scenario," I may get a lot more done or make a lot more money!!! Or atleast I would get everything done more quickly!!! Maybe not? Maybe this is a sort of "protection mechanism." Maybe my gutt is telling me something is not quite right? Have you ever hesitated on something and not know exactly WHY? I HAVE!!!!!! When this happens I just decide to do nothing for a while. This seems to work when I relieve the pressure and give myself a break. Maybe disappear for a while and do some really good thinking. If you ever get to this place, just take a break. Like I will on Tuesday of this week where I promised I would disappear into "I will do NOTHING mode."
SO, I guess I wrote this today to make you think. Just like I do. Does your mind play tricks on you? Do you talk yourself out of everything or some things? Do you create a bigger problem then it actually is? Think about it. We all do it. FEAR changes things and keeps you from moving forward and can also turn people into hermits or create scenarios that are not really healthy. FEAR can make you stay in toxic relationships or friendships.
So before you disappear cause of a deep seeded FEAR, just remember to come out of your cave and enjoy the sunshine! Just get yourself out there and the rest will follow.