PLEASE GOD I'M ONLY 36 YEARS OLD

PLEASE GOD I'M ONLY 36 By: Heather Irvin© 9/3/2002

The last thing I remember was Jaime calling me,

from the hospital telling me you were hurt,

"hurry up, get over here, we're alone here".

As I was talking to Jaime I heard a teardrop fall,

and I felt a shock in my body.

All that was found next to your body was a spoon-glass, needle.

All we could ask was - When, Why, Who could do this?

We know you didn't do it.

You weren't on drugs.

We can only imagine what happened.....

As you were laying on the bathroom floor,

you could hear someone calling you,

telling you to open your eyes.

You could feel air being forced down your throat from CPR being performed.

You could hear a conversation but couldn't move.

As you were laying there for quite a while a police officer stood over your body.

And he was asking questions you thought were being asked to you,

but someone else was answering.

"Who is in here with me?"

"Why can't I talk?"

"Why won't my lips move?"

All of a sudden you were being put on a bed,

and was being pricked with IV's and tubes down your throat.

"What are they doing?"

"Where are you taking me?"

"I can't feel anything!!!"

"Hey don't pull that sheet over my head, I can't be dead!"

"I am only 36! I got a date tonight with my girl Jaime.

We were supposed to meet at a party.

I'm supposed to grow old and have lots of kids & marry my girl Jaime.

I haven't lived yet. I can't be dead".

"Later they were dressing me & prepping me to be put in a drawer,

my folks had to identify my body.

Why did they have to see me like this?

Why did I have to look into my girls eyes?

My mom & dad suddenly looked old,

They told the man in charge "yes sir that is our son".

The funeral was a weird experience,

I saw Jaime, my relatives, friends and kids walk towards the casket.

They passed one by one and looked at me with the saddest eyes.

Some of my friends were even holding my hand.

A few of my work buddies touched me as they walked by.

Please somebody- WAKE ME UP!!! Get me out of here. I can't bear to see my Jaime hurting.

My parents crying and sobbing for me. My brother and sisters are like zombies, they look like robots in a daze. Everybody HELP!!!

No one can believe this, I can't believe this either.

Please don't bury me, I am not dead.

I have alot of living left to do. I want to run and laugh again.

I want to hear my oldies and dance!

Please don't put me in the ground.

I promise if you give me just one more chance God,

I will be the most careful man in the whole world.

I will change my friends and my life. All I want is one more chance.

Please God, I am only 36."-

THIS POEM IS DEDICATED TO MY BESTFRIEND JAIME. THIS IS HOW I FEEL TONY FELT. -HEATHER IRVIN ©(2002)