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People Wearing Pajamas in Public - Why?
Pajama Wearing in Public - Just Say No!
I hate to break this to you, but there is a serious new epidemic out there spreading like wildfire across the U.S.A.: pajama wearing in public. Yes! Gasp! I am sure you have seen it. Maybe you are even a victim of this terrible condition. Have no fear! You can easily overcome this affliction right now. Take the pajamas off before you leave your house!
When and why did this become acceptable? I have to blame college students. About ten years ago, college students stopped bothering to roll out their dorm beds and put pants on to go to class. They determined they would rather look stupid than take that extra two minutes to find pants and a shirt. For some reason, this trend caught on. Why? Why did anyone think college students had a good idea? Have you seen their dorm rooms? Even worse, have you looked in their mini-fridges? This is not a group of people we should try to imitate.
The rest of society is tired of walking into stores, theaters, and other public places only to view a group of adults wearing pajamas. Sure, we can look past it in some situations. If you are at a doctor's office or a drive-thru window, maybe pajamas are acceptable. But in general, it is not. It is time to have some dignity, folks!
The time has come to put an end to this. Stop wearing your pajamas in public. No one wants to see a grown woman wearing her Winnie the Pooh PJs at the local grocery store. No one wants to see a grown man in Batman pajamas strolling the aisles at Home Depot. Put some pants on! There are a few exceptions that society will let slide, but not too many. In case you can't figure this out on your own, I will make a couple of helpful lists.
Acceptable Pajama Wearing Locations:
- At your home
- At your friend's home during a sleepover
- At your Grandma's house
- At the hospital if you are a patient
- Going to get the mail (not at post office though - that's still public!)
- Doctor's office if you are very ill
- 7-11 (I will let this slide, you must be in a desperate situation if you are there anyway.)
- Walmart from 9 PM - 9 AM if buying cold medicine, toilet paper, or Kleenex
- Fast food restaurant if going through drive-thru
- Bank if going through drive-thru
- College dorms
Non-Acceptable Pajama Wearing Locations:
- School (any age level!)
- College classes
- Inside fast food restaurants
- Grocery stores
- Nice restaurants
- Post office
- Work (unless you are in a sleep research lab!)
- Walmart between the hours of 9 AM to 9 PM
- The mall
- Any store!
- Your friend's house in daylight hours
- A wedding
- A wedding reception
- A funeral
- A hospital when visiting a patient (the nurse may try to escort you to the mental ward.)
- At the park
- At the beach
Admit it... do you wear pajamas in public?
Put Some Pants On and Let's Face the World!
Now that you fully understand the rules of pajama wearing, I know your day will be just a little brighter. Also, please keep in mind, if you do feel the need to wear pajamas in public for any reason, make sure they don't have holes in them. It is one thing to wear a new pair of PJs to Walmart in the middle of the night to get cough syrup, but it is entirely wrong to wear tiny pajamas that look like they came from 80s, they haven't fit you in 10 years, and everyone can see through them due to all the holes. Stop it! Your Cabbage Patch Kid pajamas do not impress us!
Just remember - don't give in to peer pressure. Your friends may like to wear pajamas in public, but if that is the case, your friends are idiots. Don't listen to them. Put on a t-shirt and some jeans, and be a part of society. Thank you for reading and have a productive, non-pajama wearing day!
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