Poetry- I silence my inhibitions
Reach out into darkness
Truth is I'm not so far from being dead
I’m down to the wire,
Down to playing pretend.
Going through the motions of living,
But truth is I'm not so far from being dead.
As hard as I know I try,
I can't seem to find the steps to get ahead.
In the moment of truth I look at myself
And I am who I now have come to regret
What is it that I lack?
What is it I do not see?
Why can't I catch a glimpse of hope?
To find my courage to believe.
Reach out from the silence
That puts me in my place.
Reach out into darkness,
As my fears take over and I can no longer see
Sure it makes no sense.
Sure I feel your touch
I don't understand what it means.
But you tell me this is love,
When I'm lost to the world
and what it is you say you need.
It is me who falls from grace
As people stare to watch as I bleed
I never got the notice,
That things would be alright.
I silence my inhibitions,
To keep you satisfied.
I can't understand, why I stand alone,
Why I feel Lonely when I can't find a moment to be alone.
Taken by a chance,
That makes very little sense.
I am battling with a feeling,
I pretend I don't notice.
I shake, and I cry,
But I do so with no sound.
I must not disturb a moment,
That may be needed to figure more out.
If I could see the future,
Feel the meaning of a touch.
Would I become whole?
Or become lost within something described as love.
I don't want too much,
to be silent anymore.
But I cannot find my voice,
to call out to the world.
I show my heart too soon.
You see me for who I am.
I am ashamed of my face,
And the worth of notice I believe I will always lack.
Take away a moment,
To my inhibitions within the dark.
I am guided by the confusion
Of why I am nothing like who you are.
Wipe a tear from my cheek,
Hold my breath to hide my pain.
You shouldn't feel guilty for forgetting my face.
I sometimes can't recall my own name
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