Sex Too Soon/Teens
Truth About Premature Sex
You should know that sex was meant to be a special act of love between married adults (18 and over). It was meant to consummate the marriage (to conclude it). It was never meant for preteens and teens, because as a teen you would not realize the short or long term affects having sex would have on your life. There are responsibilities and consequences to having sex - neither of which you would be prepared for as a teen. Unfortunately television, movies, music and music videos have betrayed sex to be a recreational activity, having no consequence - and that is not the truth. There are consequences to having sex too soon and you should be educated on those consequences before you decide to participate in any type of sexual activities. No matter how mature you think your mindset is-- as a preteen or teenager you do not have the proper mindset, education, or clear understanding as to how to deal with the consequences. This is why you should wait until you have at least completed your high school education and have become aware of the consequences, before you decide to indulge in any type of sexual activity....including oral and anal sex. Understand that having sex does not make or mean someone loves you.
A Message To Teen Girls/Young Women
You are so precious and beautiful in your own right. Own that right and present yourself as the princess you are meant to be. You don't have act conceited, but know that you deserve to be respected. It does not matter your complexion, weight, height or whatever the flaws you see in yourself (understand that we all have flaws).....you are beautiful and valuable to some young man just as you are.
I know that some of you believe having sex will entice a guy to love you. You should not be thinking about if a guy is in love with you or not while you are a teen. Love come later after your education and with a mature mindset. Others consider having sex because their peers may be having sex and perhaps are pressuring them to do the same. This is all wrong thinking.....in fact having sex will have an opposite affect. The guy will most often loose respect for you because, he will believes you do not respect yourself, and may even begin spreading nasty rumors about you. Also, by having sex you may become pregnant; which will deprive you of your teen and young adult life and could put a pause or stop to your education. You could contract a sexual transmitted disease (STD); which could cause long term effects to your body. There are diseases like Herpes, HIV and AIDS in which there is no cure.
There is too much responsibility and so many consequences to having sex as a teen. You should hold off having sex for as long as possible, preferably after marriage. This is holding on to your freedom to go through the steps of being a teen then young adult and will also preserve your self respect as well as respect from others (guys). When you hold off having sex because someone wants or expects you to demands respect from that person. Guys are capable of waiting for sex as long as you make them wait and I am talking years. I am not saying he will not have sex with someone else while he waits, but he will be prone to respect you for not allowing him to have sex with you. Another way to demand respect is to dress in a way that does not expose all your precious body parts. You can dress in a way that flatters your figure without showing too much. Guys have a vivid imagination when it comes to the female and like to use it when looking at you. He does not want to think everyone has seen all the special parts of the body of someone he wants to be serious about. When you dress this way it says to a guy you are confident you respect yourself and you don't have sex because someone wants you too. Therefore, he will be prone to approach you in a respectful manner. This is how you protect your girl power. Once you begin having sex with a guy his respect level for you becomes lower or goes away. There is less reason for him to respect you because he has accomplished what he wanted to do. There are so many different ways he can disrespect you after having sex with you.....that would make you feel bad about yourself (calling you bad names, spreading rumors, yelling and even hitting you, etc.). This behavior has much to do with his maturity level (he's young), but should not be tolerated. Having sex too soon is just not worth the problems that come with it....wait until you have grown and fully understand the consequences. However, if for any reason you cannot sustain sex, or you are already sexually active-- always use a condom. You should carry one or two at all times...don't depend on him to have one.
A Message To Teen Boys/Young Men
You are handsome, charming, and smart with the world at your feet and the sky is the limit. Don't put limits on your teen/young adult years by having sex and risking the possibility of fathering a child or getting a sexually transmitted disease (STD).You are not prepared financially or have the proper mindset to be a father as a teen.
You do not want to get someone pregnant before you have completed your high school education and perhaps gone on to further your education. Hopefully you marry before you start having children with someone, because you will be required by law to help support any and all children that you father. It will be difficult to support a child financially without the education to obtain a legal job. Even if you complete your education and are able to qualify for a good job, having children outside a marriage can be complicated and can get very expensive the more children you have. You will find yourself associated with a mother or mothers of your child or children that you barely know or even like -- yet you are attached because of that child for a lifetime. If you cannot support these children you could find yourself in jail.
Understand that stealing and selling drugs is not a legal or real job. This will hurt your future of getting a real and legal job if you are caught by the police. You do not want to even consider stealing and selling drugs as means to support yourself or a child. The consequences are too great and it makes no sense.... It is a waste of your valuable time. You need a legal job where there are long term benefits such as social security, insurance, retirement plan, etc. If you get caught stealing and selling drugs you will go to jail and may even be killed. And that would be tragic because as young people each of your lives are very valuable to the future of the world. We as older adults are getting older and we depend on our youth to move our countries forward. That is why it is important for you to stay in school and pursue your education. Should you go to jail you will get a criminal record which will hinder (stop) you or delay your getting a good job.... It's just not worth it. You are smart and do not have to get involved in such activities. You should stay away from these activities at all cost and anyone else that's involved in these activities. Stay in school and complete your education and hopefully sustain sex. You don't want to have children too soon nor do you want a sexually transmitted disease (STD) -- some of which there is no cure (Herpes, HIV, AIDS). Therefore, I am saying sustain sex (don't have it).
However, if you cannot sustain yourself, by all means wear a condom each and every time. Do not get caught having sex and not wearing a condom. Do not depend on the female to have the condom you have one or two at all times. If you are curious...... know that sex feels the same with or without a condom.
My advice to all teens is to stay away from all sexual activities until you have finished your education, and have the ability to be responsible mentally, financially and can accept all the ramifications that come with being sexually active. I understand that growing up can be difficult at times when there is pressure to do well in school, perhaps you are involved in other activities, and there is peer pressure. I know it's not always easy to deal with it all-- but understand that we all go through or have gone through growing pains. Know that sooner than you think high school and college will be a thing of the past. You will loose contact with many of your classmates and what seems important now will become a memory. My advice comes from a religious stand point as well as my personal experience. God intended for sex to be between married couples and there are good reasons for his intentions. Our lives can get real complicated when we don't do it God's way.
Whenever or if you ever feel overwhelmed know that there is power in prayer. You can always get help and draw strength from GOD.....talk to him through prayer. Pray this prayer every night before going to bed or in the morning or both.
"Lords Prayer" (Matt.6:10-14): "Our Father in heaven, Hallowed be your name, your Kingdom come, your will be done, on earth as in heaven, Give us today our daily bread. And forgive us our debts, as we also forgive our debtors, and do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For the kingdom, the power and the glory are yours, now and forever.
At the end of your prayer say "Lord help me, strengthen me where I am weak," - then tell him where you are weak or need help. Always end your prayer with "In Jesus name I pray, Amen."