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Shrouded

Updated on October 2, 2012


Suffocating in my own realms

Of confusion and intense turmoil

Ambiguously hidden truths and

Happiness I cannot uncoil




Finding a path twixt my rights and wrongs

Seems so daunting, I’m better forlorn

This curiosity is the harbinger of pain

Of proportions which have me torn




What comes simply is grief not life

Engulfed, embedded in a bed of nails

Each night to me brings strife

Every attempt to live… fails




Each deed tends to negativity

Infinitely hurting those I love

In fear of such indefinite sins

All companionship I forcibly shove




The sounds of my heart

Seem purposelessly to me

Immersed in loneliness

Myself I thwart

I wish…

Someone puts an end to me

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    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks Aubrey :)

      I am glad you like it

    • CrazedNovelist profile image

      A.E. Williams 4 years ago from Hampton, GA

      Awesome writing, Rahul! I love your poetry!! :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks so much Love... I am glad you connected to it :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hello Martie... :) Despair is somethings we all face in life... some let it have a permanent place in the soul for various reasons.... I keep it to be able to feel beauty....

      Yes knowing despair makes me feel real beauty in everything.... I am happy with what I am now... true.. I find ways to be happy too...

      I am tough enough Gran... to put an end to me... is not an easy task :)

      Thanks so much for connecting :)

    • profile image

      lovedoctor926 4 years ago

      Hi Rahul, very deep and dark. voted up!

    • MartieCoetser profile image

      Martie Coetser 4 years ago from South Africa

      Oh, my dear Rahul, this poem was released by a soul bleeding with despair. There were times in my life this would have been the outcry of my own bleeding soul. Absolutely heartbreaking. Fortunately I've learned that being happy and contented is a choice we have to make. (There is a hub about this in my corner.) If we want to be unhappy, we WILL find a hundred reasons, and if we want to be happy, we will also find a hundred reasons. So one might as well focus on the latter and ENJOY the wonderful privilege to breathe and live on this beautiful planet Earth.

      Voted up, useful, heartbreaking and beautifully DARK. (Beauty even lingers in darkness ~ feelings, tears, hope to be found..... this is all part of being alive :))

      BTW, I wish that someone never puts an end to you...

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Beck... it makes me sad that you relate to the words of my poem.... Sometimes... we become our own enemies.. and this when prolonged becomes devastating.... I hope its not prolonged in your case

    • shiningirisheyes profile image

      Shining Irish Eyes 4 years ago from Upstate, New York

      Rahul - Safe to say this is one of my favorite reads from you. I can relate to this so well. Although everyone takes their own meaning from a read, I relate it to my own worst enemy - MYSELF!~

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hello Jennifer.... thanks so much for connecting... I am glad you found my work worth a look...

      I am just a messenger my friend.. just a messenger... conveying what i feel to wonderful people like you...

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Juris... nice to see you dear friend... I am glad you found it worth a read :)

      it is an interpretation... an expression... to connect to those.. who can take an initiative

      Thank so much for the visit my dear :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      "the agony of decisions".... you put the entire poem into its summary with these words my friend :)

      Light in the end will surely be there.... thank you Doc... for such a kind visit and warm words... your wisdom is priceless

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      I am sorry I gave that feeling to you :)

      No one can know the true joy of happiness unless he at one point in his life.. he has embraced pain... :)

      Thank you so much Coffee... I am humbled by your support :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks so much Faith... no .. how can I be tortured when I have the luxury of the companionship of wonderful people like you :)

      Thanks so much for the kindness :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks so much Ruchi..... I am glad you connected to it ..:)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thank you so much Sush.... You truly humble me with your kind words... I am just a messenger my friend... you definitely are a much much better writer than I am... :)

      Thanks again for the kindness :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Not a personal expression Sir Rajan :)

      I hope I did not make you sad... and just gave you some food for thought :)

      Thanks for the visit sir :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Most of the times.... Leslie... most of the times Ignorance is bliss... but many do not adapt to this notion amid this hustle bustle of life... :)

      Thanks so much my friend for such kind words :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Martin... I do not know anyone other than you who conveys so much in so few words :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      I am fine mother Deb... sometimes.. the past just clings on to you :) Thanks mother Deb/.. what would I do without you !!!!

    • rahul0324 profile image
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      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Shauna.... my sister... we may not have ever met in real... but I must say.. you sweetheart... know me better than most people :) Thank you for your continued support and love... I am so humbled by your kindness.. and I so much wish I could meet you someday :)

      Thank you so much sister :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi CJ.... Thanks so much for your kind visit.... I am glad you connected with my work and found it worth a read :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Wonderful to see you Joyce... Thanks for the kind words... and trust me... i am fine :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks so much Christy... I am glad you connected :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      You are right Sir Bill..... At some point in our life... we do feel this way.... but eventually life will show us the way out :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Thanks so much Rasma... you are wonderful and a very kind-hearted person :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      It is in the end a creative effort my friend Xstatic :)

      Thanks so much for your kind visit...

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      I do not feel this way Suzette... but sadly many do.... Its so wonderful of you to take the initiative to make them understand that life on the whole is beautiful :)

      Thank you for the kind feedback and warm words :)

    • rahul0324 profile image
      Author

      Jessee R 4 years ago from Gurgaon, India

      Hi Who! I appreciate your words of optimism... I abide by them too... But I write these lines to convey that many in despair who dwell among us do not feel that way... my agenda is to bring forward wonderful people like you who's positive feedback can inspire those in despair

      Thanks a lot for reading and appreciating my work :)

    • Jennifer Stone profile image

      Jennifer Stone 4 years ago from the Riverbank, England

      This poem captures the desperation and feelings of hopelessness that depression brings perfectly... "Finding a path twixt my rights and wrongs Seems so daunting, I'm better forlorn"... your words speak volumes, describing self blame, fear and sadness... You are a very talented wordsmith my friend, good work! Best wishes from the riverbank, and all the votes coming your way, Jen

    • D.Juris Stetser profile image

      D.Juris Stetser 4 years ago from South Dakota

      Voted up , awesome, beautiful and interesting. Rahul I hope this is an exercize.in poetic license and not your actual feelings. You are so incredibly talented... I WANT this to be your interpretation of such deep depression, and not what you feel you're experiencing. Hugs, my friend. Sharing dotti

    • Docmo profile image

      Mohan Kumar 4 years ago from UK

      Beautiful words that captures the torment of being and the agony of decisions... your words seek and sear through these pages. You have painted an image of despair and devastation, yet one can't help wonder that through all this darkness there will be light... Poems seek such extreme moods: darkness and light, love and loss, fear and friendship.... you are a master at this. Keep well, my friend.

    • coffeegginmyrice profile image

      Marites Mabugat-Simbajon 4 years ago from Toronto, Ontario

      Beautiful Rahul as always though I feel like I am tied around my neck. "Engulfed, embedded in a bed of nails..." -- OUCH!!!

      Hope your composition does not reflect anything 'bout you.

      Deep sadness and misery do linger at times when a man's soul is weak and allows darkness to fall upon him...shrouding him. Man, look to your right... :)

      Have a happy day, Rahul!

      P.S. I love the top photo of the pine trees shrouded by a cloud or a cloud of mist.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 4 years ago from southern USA

      Pure devastation of the soul expressed so vividly in your words. You are magnificent as always in your expressive words and imagery. The torture of one's own mind due to self. Powerful!!! As all have stated here, I pray you are not the tortured soul. Voted Way Up God bless. In His Love, Faith Reaper

    • Ruchira profile image

      Ruchira 4 years ago from United States

      Wow such despair in this poetry yet beautifully narrated.

      Many votes, Rahul

    • sen.sush23 profile image

      Sushmita 4 years ago from Kolkata, India

      Rahul, I could not get time to come and enjoy the hubs as much as I would love to. Today, I checked out on FB and came to this poem. This is just so beautiful. First, I was captivated by the wonderful black and white images you had lined up. The hub is aesthetically so appealing with the expressions of torture and pain. I could not but get caught by the graphics. Then I came back and read the poem a second time, all by itself- without the graphics. I so like the last paragraph, and as Epi says, the best thing I can say is 'I wish I had written this'. Who but I am my biggest enemy!

    • rajan jolly profile image

      Rajan Singh Jolly 4 years ago from From Mumbai, presently in Jalandhar,INDIA.

      This is too deep for comfort, Rahul. It has drawn so many emotions and feelings within me.

      I hope it's only your creativity, that is! Not a personal expression.

    • ImKarn23 profile image

      Karen Silverman 4 years ago

      "This curiosity is the harbinger of pain..."

      Such insight into the human mind and spirit - such a heart wrenching existence..

      Perhaps ignorance really is bliss..

      Sharing this, my friend - wherever i can!

    • Mhatter99 profile image

      Martin Kloess 4 years ago from San Francisco

      Thank you for this. There is a lesson in your expression.

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      this one really pulled my heartstring Rahul.. makes me cry.. are you alright? it is beautiful but so sad.

      love you rahul

      Mom

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 4 years ago from Central Florida

      My brother, I've said it once and I'll probably say it a thousand times: if I did not know your personal strength these poems of despair would worry me. Conversely, only a true poet can convey emotions that are felt by the reader. You take your life experiences and share with the world in hope someone will be healed as you have been.

      You never cease to amaze me. You have a calling in this world my brother, thanks to your inner strength and survival.

      I love you!

      Shauna

    • C J Johnson profile image

      Corrinna 4 years ago from BC, Canada

      Such a beautiful and heart wrenching poem. Very touching.

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      Voted up and Awesome. This is a deep emotional poem. Please don't let this poem be your real feelings, Joyce.

    • ChristyWrites profile image

      Christy Birmingham 4 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      Wow how turbulent and emotional - what power!

    • billybuc profile image

      Bill Holland 4 years ago from Olympia, WA

      I think, at times, we all are our own worst enemies. You captured it perfectly my friend; very emotional, very painful, very real.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      Voted up and awesome. An incredible and emotionally wrenching piece. Hope this doesn't express how you feel Rahul and you're just the creative genius behind this piece. Loved it and passing it on.

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      This is the second hub I have read today about such despondent feelings. Vincent Moore has one also today. I truly hope they are both creative efforts and do not reflect the feelings you and he are experiencing.

      This is good, but sad poetry. Up!

    • suzettenaples profile image

      Suzette Walker 4 years ago from Taos, NM

      Very sad and emotional. But, I don't like the ending. If you feel this way - please talk to someone or get some professional help so they can help you uncoil your happiness. All is not lost! I know you say this is satirical, but reading this scares me that you might harm yourself.

    • whonunuwho profile image

      whonunuwho 4 years ago from United States

      A heartfelt and emotional work. You show what life may bring to us and what we interpret it in our distress. There has to be an escape to the freedom as the birds, that soar in the skies above. It is a change in mindset, not our demise. We must dig down inside and grit our teeth and climb out of this dungeon in our minds, and break free into the light.