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Socks Without Mates

Updated on June 4, 2009

Chuck's Theory of Lost Socks

Background: One day I put six identical socks in the washing machine. New socks. Men's dress, black, over the calf, size 9 - 11. I also put in a few T-shirts, but only those six identical socks. No other socks were hidden in the clothes, no other clothes were in the washer or dryer. I double checked.

When I put the load in the dryer, all six socks were there.

When I took the load out of the dryer, I still had six socks. However, now only 5 were identical. Sure, the sixth was black, and probably the same size. But it was thick, completely different material and carefully darned in the toes. I don't darn socks.

And anyway, I'd never seen it before. it didn't belong to anyone in my family.

I know what you're thinking. This sock clearly came from the prior load. But not only had I double checked both the washer and the dryer, it was also whites. Bleached. Besides, that doesn't explain where the original sixth sock went. When I explained this problem to my husband, he stated his Theory of Lost Socks:

If the socks are lost in the washer, it is because of and directly related to the spin cycle, which spins so fast it thrusts them into another time or dimension. If the socks are lost in the dryer, it is because of the heat in combination with the tumbling action. This also explains why lost socks sometimes reappear or why strange socks appear in someone else's appliance.

Makes sense. Still, as much thought as he has given this, you'd assume he folds his own socks. HAH!

Well, at least he gets them into the dirty clothes hamper.

But now I have all these socks who need mates.

Nice, single men's dress sock seeks mate

  • Men's Dress Sock Size 9-11, over the calf, seeks mate
  • I am an attractive, black sock
  • Men's Dress Sock
  • I am on the dressy side.
  • I love to take walks.
  • I like the better kind of casual dress, or formal shoes.
  • I still have a lot of elastic left at the top and there are no holes in my toes or heels.
  • ¬†Am willing to settle for anyone, even non-identical, fairly similar


Single White Low Cut Sock Seeks Sole Mate

  • Single, White Lonely Low Cut Androgynous sock.
  • Grey and yellow accents.
  • "Large" and what looks like a letter "G" printed on sole of sock.
  • Excellent, like new condition.
  • Seeks mate with similar characteristics.
  • Probably size 9-11.


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    • I'm gng 2 be thin profile image

      I'm gng 2 be thin 

      8 years ago from Harlem NY

      Make a sock blanket, or hat, that's what I did...It's very warm and you can keep them in the car for cold winter mornings

    • Lucey Knight profile image

      Lucey Knight 

      9 years ago from North Richland Hills, Texas

      Welcome to hub pages. This is a really neat hub. Very enjoyable read.

    • Montana Farm Girl profile image

      Montana Farm Girl 

      9 years ago from Northwestern Montana

      Very clever, very cute!!!! Welcome to the HUB.... I am a relative newbie too and I can tell you the folks here are the BEST!!! Very supportive and encouraging~~


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