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Soldier moles ( The beginning)

Updated on July 27, 2011

An insight into the first DNA experiments

During the latter part of the last century a great number of advances were made in the study of genetics and DNA.
None of the work though was as significant as that taken by the ministry of defence in England during the end days of world war2.

Between 1938 and 1945 the government had systematically removed all the road signs in the country along with a great deal of street lighting.
It was understood that these measures were needed to protect against enemy invasion from the sky the premise being that even though they were intelligent enough to navigate from Berlin to Bradford in the pitch black of night they would be unable to find anything without road signs to guide them and lights to read their maps.

So was born out of this confusion a desire to replace the lamp posts at the earliest convenience after hostilities ended.
Petrol because of its volatile nature would still be rationed, so, a smart way of travelling and replacing lamps with minimum fuel needed to be devised.

Moles! Well known for their love of burrowing and tunnelling were taken captive and held within Warcop a military establishment within rural Yorkshire the heart and soul of England.
The plan was very simple if not 100% effective.
They fed the moles an exclusive diet of steroids, mercury and soldier ants, the first attempt at genetic engineering, thus was born the first ever SOLDIER MOLE.
Growing bigger by the day the moles grew agitated at the lack of space provided within the camp and to minimise the chance of escape a metalled road was built encircling the whole area.
As those who have had fillings will know the interaction of metal and mercury leads to a very sharp intense pain when they meet, this pain acted as the deterrent to keep the Moles enclosed until after the war.

For it was after the war that the SOLDIER MOLES were to come into their own, leading out from Warcop was a structure of intertwined metalled roads which wound through vast swathes of evergreen woods towards the towns and villages which were without evening lighting.
Opening the pathway by removing some of the surrounding roads the scientists set them on their way.
It was like shelling peas for the lighting engineers as the moles followed the edges of the roads to avoid the roots of the evergreen trees which they detested.
Following with poles cables and lamp stands the North Yorkshire moors were soon aglow again the prognosis was that the whole of the British mainland could be re-lit within weeks rather than months sticking to conventional methods.

They had of course not counted though on the actions of the TREE BADGER.
Tree badgers, or pains in the arse as they were to be known by the highways department had travelled south due to the war, this migration was triggered by the RAF of all people.
Because of the success of the Spitfire against the Luftwaffe more trees were felled than normal along the Scotland England border for the manufacture of spare parts.
TREE BADGERS as their name suggests live on a diet of trees, mainly soft wood Pine Spruce and the occasional Larch.
With the depletion of their food stock they swept southwards in search of sustenance.

The decimation they left behind them can still be seen to this day on the open fens and moors that are well known as tourist attractions for those who love to walk in the open air. The dispersion of the first and only troop of genetically engineered SOLDIER MOLES was inevitable as the barriers to their outwards travel (the tree roots) diminished.
Occasionally if you travel across the north York moors during the winter time some signs of the last vestige of moles can still be seen at the side of the roads normally up and down hillsides along the road side but as for an actual sighting?
Perhaps more in the next instalment..


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