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Deathly Faces (a Poetry Challenge by Frank Atanacio)

Updated on November 26, 2016
Jodah profile image

John has been writing poetry since his school days. He was awarded "Poet of the Year 2014" Hubby Awards and has had two poems become songs.

 Ghostly Vicar - This photo was taken at the Eastry church near Sandwich, county of Kent in 1956. The photographer insisted that when he took the photo, the only persons in the church were his wife and the cleaning lady.
Ghostly Vicar - This photo was taken at the Eastry church near Sandwich, county of Kent in 1956. The photographer insisted that when he took the photo, the only persons in the church were his wife and the cleaning lady. | Source

Spirits sat as Mourners (starting link)

"He knew

As death grew,

The lights were dimmer,

As the darkness began to shimmer,

Eyes would glow

As the candles in back

Burnt low

And spirits sat as mourners

Massed together all in a row…"

by Frank Atanacio

Source

Reasoning behind my verse.

I tried to continue the scene Frank set up as I saw it. My verse portrays spirits/demons gathered at a funeral of a departed one waiting to steal the soul and take it to Hell. The preacher in turn trying to prevent that by reading Holy verse and attempting to dedicate the soul to Heaven.

.......

Deathly faces

No airs and graces,

Unblinking, cold, and grey

As they watched another join the Frey.

While the priest

Read God's holy word,

Challenging the evil beast

To try to steal another soul,

And empty husk upon which demons feast.

by John Hansen

.......

Created by Moms-Secret
Created by Moms-Secret

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    • Jodah profile image
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      John Hansen 3 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you very much, Bob. Your comment is greatly appreciated.

    • profile image

      Bob Cast 3 months ago

      wow this is amazing poetry

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 10 months ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you for revisiting this hub, Shyron. That will help keep it featured. I have trouble with most of my hubs that were part of challenges, because they don't tend to get a lot of traffic after the initial influx. I see Au Fait often revisits yours and that helps. Blessings back.

    • Shyron E Shenko profile image

      Shyron E Shenko 10 months ago from Texas

      John I had forgotten how great this is, really amazing. You are right we need to comment to keep them alive.

      Blessings my friend.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Great idea Phyllis. I was waiting until all contributions seemed to be finished before attempting to go back through in order. There are some great contributions.

    • Phyllis Doyle profile image

      Phyllis Doyle Burns 3 years ago from High desert of Nevada.

      Very good, Jodah. I love what Moms did with your poem on the image and I am glad to see you added it to your hub. You started us all out by your first response to Frank, and you did so with class. Thank you.

      I have commented on a few other contributions as they came by my way, now I am starting at the beginning to catch the flow of the whole challenge.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Moms, for your kind comments. I read your stanza and it was amazing, fitted in perfectly also. Thank you so much for the pic with the imbedded text, I have used that already on here. Great work! I am sure you will enjoy all the other verses as well. Have fun.

    • Moms-Secret profile image

      Lissette 3 years ago from Central Florida

      I wrote off of this one. Fun. I have to go back and read all of the other posts. There are so many. It will take a while, I am sure.

      Anyway, There is something I made for you guys on it. It was my way of showing your works without having my work flagged for plagiarism. Feel free to take it :)

      https://hubpages.com/literature/Spirits-Sat-as-Mou...

    • Moms-Secret profile image

      Lissette 3 years ago from Central Florida

      Great Jodah, it went from Frank's voice into yours without a seam. I like the creepy music clip too. Nice.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Ok, no problem.

    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 3 years ago

      I just compared mine with yours and they are the same. I must have seen it wrong the first time. Sorry about that.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      ok, I tweeked the wording of the link titles and description.

    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 3 years ago

      I had a link to his Hub but it did not show the same as it did in yours.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      I don't know why it wouldn't work then. Frank himself was having trouble linking hubs to hs a few days back. maybe you have the same problem...could be a glitch somewhere. Maybe ask him what he did.

    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 3 years ago

      Thanks Jodah. That is what I did with the link - as always.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Hi Kevin, thanks for those kind comments, share and pin.

      All I do is right click the whole url in the search window and copy t to a link capsule. make sure you click on 'add link' and 'done' and it should work.

    • The Examiner-1 profile image

      The Examiner-1 3 years ago

      You did a great job in portraying ghosts. It was an awesome poem. Voted up, shared and Pinned.

      Kevin

      P.S. - One question, I see that you also did a good job on linking. I linked to Frank's sire but it did not work out right. Can you tell me what I may have done wrong? Thank you.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks so much nighthag. I agree it is exhilarating to let the darker side out occasionally. Most of my writing tends towards the positive, inspirational or funny, but once in a while my other side escapes...lol. I hope you check out the other hubber's contributions to this poem.

    • nighthag profile image

      K.A.E Grove 3 years ago from Australia

      there is nothing more exciting then letting the darker side of our writing come out, which you have done with beautiful grace and great flair here.

      so very very well done!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Jamie. Glad you enjoyed. I loved your verse as well.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Audrey, I appreciate your kind comment. It is one of my favourite genres to read or watch as well but strangely I have written very little in this way. Maybe I should do more. I enjoyed this challenge.

    • jhamann profile image

      Jamie Lee Hamann 3 years ago from Reno NV

      Great job Jodah! What a creepy video you have shared! Jamie

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 3 years ago from California

      This is one of my absolute favorite genres John--well done!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Shauna, I did my best.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 3 years ago from Central Florida

      Excellent contribution, Jodah. You kept the flow going.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Alexander. I am glad you could imagine this eerie scene. Appreciate your kind comment.

    • ubanichijioke profile image

      Alexander Thandi Ubani 3 years ago from Lagos

      i love...

      i could see them in my mind's eye; the faces and hollowness within the spaces as they wait to take what theirs is not.

      well written, Sire.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Devika, it is a different type of poem for me to write as well. Glad you liked it though.

    • DDE profile image

      Devika Primić 3 years ago from Dubrovnik, Croatia

      I liked this kind of poem something so different and so much to think about.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for reading this Dana. I know it's a dark tale, but glad you liked it. I appreciate the vote up.

    • Dana Tate profile image

      Dana Tate 3 years ago from LOS ANGELES

      That was food for thought Jodah: Good versus evil fighting for the soul of the newly departed. I liked it. Voted up!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Blossom, that is the fun of more than one author of a poem. You never know where it will go.

    • BlossomSB profile image

      Bronwen Scott-Branagan 3 years ago from Victoria, Australia

      Fascinating continuation. I wonder where it will go next.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Alicia, thanks for your great comment. Glad I could keep Frank's chilling theme going.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for reading Anna. I appreciate your kind comment and glad you liked the images too. Look forward to reading your contribution.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks for reading Anna. I appreciate your kind comment and glad you liked the images too. Look forward to reading your contribution.

    • AliciaC profile image

      Linda Crampton 3 years ago from British Columbia, Canada

      This is an interesting poetry challenge! I enjoyed both Frank's poem and your contribution. Your poem is chilling and scary and is a great continuation of Frank's idea!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you bearmom for your kind comment. Yes it is short because it is a poetic challenge to be built upon. We were all instructed to keep our verses under 10 lines so it allows scope for others to add to it. I really appreciate your kind comments and encourage you to check out the links to the other contributors. Have a great day.

    • Anna Haven profile image

      Anna Haven 3 years ago from Scotland

      The paranormal is my favourite genre so really liked this. Very deftly etched to Frank's beginning. Great picture choices too.

      Anna

    • bearnmom profile image

      Laura L Scotty 3 years ago from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania

      I read this twice to be sure that it was so short but interesting. I was lured in by the picture of the ghostly monk praying in a pew.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Flourish, I tried to keep Frank's same rhyme scheme and continue the theme as best I could.

    • FlourishAnyway profile image

      FlourishAnyway 3 years ago from USA

      I love not only the words and images you evoke but also the creative twist of how one writer builds on another. Seamless!

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Faith, thanks so much for that amazing comment. Much appreciated. It's a lot darker than what I'm used to writing, but that's the fun of the challenge, and what Frank is particularly good at.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Faith, thanks so much for that amazing comment. Much appreciated. It's a lot darker than what I'm used to writing, but that's the fun of the challenge, and what Frank is particularly good at.

    • Faith Reaper profile image

      Faith Reaper 3 years ago from southern USA

      Oh, wow, superb, Jodah, it truly falls perfectly behind Frank's! Okay, now I get the idea of how it works. What fun!!! Your imagery choices are great too as they do set the tone. Up and more, pinning, tweeting and sharing. Blessings, Faith Reaper

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thank you Jo.

    • tobusiness profile image

      Jo Alexis-Hagues 3 years ago from Bedfordshire, U.K

      Jodah, I loved nicely done.

    • Jodah profile image
      Author

      John Hansen 3 years ago from Queensland Australia

      Thanks Frank. glad you approve my effort.

      Thank you too Ann, I'm sure you will do a great job. Good luck.

    • annart profile image

      Ann Carr 3 years ago from SW England

      Great addition to the starting link. I'm going to try to follow this! Trouble is, it's a lot to live up to.

      Superb! Ann

    • Frank Atanacio profile image

      Frank Atanacio 3 years ago from Shelton

      Jodah this was fantastic!!!!