Earlier today I encountered a minor bump in the road, in which I let someone's small opinion get the best of me. Partially because my hormones are acting like starving tigers stranded in some arctic region they had no idea existed before. This never helps any situation. Any way, the comment made by this person upset me, and not the way some might think. The details don't need to be extrapolated on. But after the small freak-out-cry-fest-episode was over I saw the problem in a new light. This comment had pointed out a quality of my personality that I love. I will be the first, and happiest, to admit that I am what others might call "weird." It's a natural talent of mine I have been perfecting since I was old enough to sing about the kitchen cupboard doors. But I have been made fun of plenty of times, been stared at. The stink eye is a common occurrence. Even from females as young as what appear to be nine years old.
What I am blathering on about is that being strange and random is one of the best things about me. I have been in love with who I am, ever since my best friend and I found out we were just as weird as the other. Life is no fun when you abide by the rules and regulations of being considered "normal." The mundane, the drab, the dull, the monotonous. That was one of the things I vowed to never allow enter my soul. Contain my 'young at heart' persona in a bottle and never let the world sand it down, wear it away.
And this earlier opinion has made me feel like I've been able to keep that promise. That being young at heart and wildly ridiculous has maintained some of it's visage in me. But then, is that a good thing? Or does it hinder my ability to survive in the working world. Is there a way for my uniqueness to last, while still learning to be professional and proper? Or do I have to let the bottle fall to the floor and shatter, exposing my weird personality. Allow those scrutinizing looks to permeate into my mind, to mean more than they should. Is this entire hub filled with dependent clauses that sort of hang there? Of course!
I guess what I have been struggling with the last few hours is basically just doubting my ability in the professional world. All requirements of open positions seem so daunting, and how does one acquire experience without first being given the chance to get it? It's one of those days where you begin to doubt all your abilities, but I'm putting my foot down on my ability to be weird and have a good time. Being strange is even more fun when coupled with other strange beings like yourself. Haven't you ever been to a comic book convention? (I haven't but I've heard many hilarious things.)
Here's to staying true to yourself and trying desperately to keep what qualities you DO like about yourself untainted by the outside world. If you love making cookies while hulalooping, keep at it. Singing all the songs from every Disney movie you've ever loved while stuck in traffic? Go for it. I'll pull up next to you and back you up in the chorus. Life is too short to over-think who you are after you've already figured it out. And to all those other weirdos out there who can see the humor and awkwardness in situations and bend it to your will, Cheers.