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That Dark Place...When You Are Almost Over The Edge
I have seen some of my friends completely losing it. Most of the times, it is usually because of issues to do with marriage...It is almost always about marriage, what else? I have to confess this issue of marriage has been eating at me for quite a while now; it is like there is a devil in the works, doing the rounds every single minute and working so hard at destroying what should otherwise be a beautiful institution. Institution. aha.
It is like everywhere i turn someone is separating from their partner or getting a divorce. Or having these crazy fights about the most mundane of stuff. Some of the reasons for these actions are laughable, for lack of a better word. The intensity of these fights is shocking especially because if you look at it keenly they were not worth it in the first place.
I should first of all clarify that i am not married. That is why when another of my girlfriends called me the other day wailing loudly while insisting that this time it really is over, i listened to her grieve it out and calmly asked her to stay put as i go to pick her up. But not before i sat paralyzed for a few minutes wondering what on earth was really going on and if all this getting tied down business was ever worth it.
Heck, i asked myself if anything was really worth it anymore. It seems like I am losing it, caught up in a haze and just watching the days rush by like someone in a constant state of highness. But what do i know? Clearly not much, and i might be judging my girls harshly mostly because i haven't walked down that marriage path. Although come to think of it, what does anyone know? We are all on "trial and error" when it comes to this thing called life; it doesn't come with a manual you know.
You keep trying, keep getting burnt while hoping you do not get over that edge.
Maybe this is what growing up means - it is a pity that no one ever warned us it would be this hard.