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Vulgarity in Writing and in Life.

Updated on November 16, 2014

The Dice Man Cometh!

Andrew Dice Clay revolutionized vulgarity. Better duck!
Andrew Dice Clay revolutionized vulgarity. Better duck!

To The Limits of Vulgarity!

"To be or not to be, that’s the question." (Shakespeare)

"Poverty is the parent of revolution." (Aristotle)

"You say you want a revolution? Well you know, we all want to change the world." (The Beatles)

"The boy who farted laughing gas, eschewed pretentious poses. He thought those who called him vulgar, had boogers up their noses." (Ralph Waldo Emerson;)

Does this mean that The Beatles wanted us to be poor? That “to be” must in some way or another be, well, booger-free? What is vulgar today will most likely be soft in the future, as what is soft today was once vulgar. Just to say “booger” in public could have seen you walking the walk of shame to the vice principle’s office not 50 years ago. Today, teachers regularly use words. that were once considered vulgar, in teaching their regularly scheduled schedule.Am I rambling? That would make me a rambling man, then (much thanks to Duanne Allman for that one!).

For the past 50 years writers, especially those with the propensity to write for television and movies, have been pushed to find the very edges of vulgarity. Soon after the edict was declared to find the nastiest words, sentences and statements in the English language, Andrew Dice Clay showed up, espousing how, upon hearing the words "Hickory", "Dickory" and "Dock", the mouse went up his.... well, if you don't know ADC, I won't be the one to write his words here, I try to use my own. But, how can I be sure that these are actually my own words, that I did not plagiarize myself or someone else? Maybe I plagiarized off of those 1,000 monkeys writing on 1,000 typewriters.

I was accused of plagiarism a few years ago at a writing-for-pay website that I will not name because they have been very good to me ( I wrote that the Pocono Raceway was a tri-oval track that revolutionized the old, boring way that at least every 1/2 mile the driver had to turn left. Well, not exactly, but I was accused of it for saying that the track was a tri-oval, Now, anyone who has been to the Pocono knows that it is, and anyone who watches NASCAR racing knows that it is. It is, or was, the only tri-oval track in the circuit, meaning that it had 3 curves, not 4. Everybody loves a little variety once in a while, right? The article was deleted and I was reprimanded. Warned. Told off. The worst part? They believed that I had plagiarized someone, they just weren't sure who (whom?).

Ah well. Hold on, let's take a trip.... to the limits of vulgarity!

What's Love Got to do With It?

And, just what is "it"?
And, just what is "it"?

I Swear it's True!

"I'm innocent, your honor! If I'd had known it was a statue, I never would have raped it!" (Animal House)

Just where is the line in the sand when a writer explores the depths of depravity and vulgarity? Does the writer, in exploring a subject such a pedophelia or an incident of sexual assault, become a criminal, and as such then a sexual deviant in th eyes of the law and branded as such for life?

When exploring the vastness of vulgarity in society, which is no small task in and of itself, do writers leave themselves open to such laws, or is journalistic license enough to allow for writing of such vulgarities. Someone, somewhere, no matter how much the writer tries to maintain a 3rd party point-of-view, will be offended by whatever you write about, and some to the point of contacting either the police, the host (a newspaper or blog site like "Hub Pages") or their member of parliament

Not to attempt to be a comic, or a writer for a comic with a depressing addiction to depressants, but I have always thought that it really is a writer's job to explore the expanses of what is acceptable and what is not. But, what happens when you cross the line? What happens when you become a revolutionist in the war on words?

Free Speech? Nah, that's just another fighting word, like "Get him!" or "For Texas!".

Is being constantly vulgar being politically-incorrect, an attack on the censorship of censorship? Or is it just an advancement of the speakers' advancement from the kindergarten playground? What makes a person be so vulgar, to rape the English language for no other reason that to try to upset other people? Have a look around some rather common social networking sites - they're everywhere, just like cock-a-roaches.

Vulgarity is more than swearing. Truly vulgar people will make people around them cringe and thank the Heavens that they don't have to live with them. They, in a sense, invoke a reaction with their uttered word. A writer does the same with the written word and is called revolutionary? Professional? Aw, hell, let's call the whole thing off.

Would you believe me if I told you that I type really slow, just in case someone reading this is a slow reader? If I were to type faster, they would be left behind. They'd still be trying to figure out why that guy at the beginning tried to rape a statue.

A 17-year old man can't have sex with a 16-year old girl. If their birthdays are 3 day apart, she 15 about to turn 16, he just turned 17 the day before, he would be charged with aggravated statutory rape if they were to dance the dance of two. Boo Boo Ba Doo. Vulgar? Most definitely? True? Sadly. Where? Here. Really? Yes. When? Just last week, last month, last year.

Teachers sleep with students and just lose their jobs. Two love-struck kids have a night of reckless abandon and he ends up in jail for 12 years as a convicted rapist. She wanted to testify on his behalf. Doesn't matter, she is too young, or was at the time of the "offense", to act responsibly on her own volition.

I swear it's true. Does that make you believe me? It could be true, it most assuredly is, because that's the way 36 States and all of Canada have their statutory rape laws worded.

Rather vulgar, no?


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    • Marc Babineau profile image

      Marc Babineau 3 years ago from Cornwall, Ontario, The Seaway City

      Truer? Please, be honest here - is this an automatic comment maker?

    • tirelesstraveler profile image

      Judy Specht 3 years ago from California

      Never a truer story told. Nicely written.

    • Marc Babineau profile image

      Marc Babineau 6 years ago from Cornwall, Ontario, The Seaway City

      Thanks for dropping by, Red! I used to love ADC, but he got old real quick. How many times can you laugh to the same old jokes?

      At least comedians don't kill that many people... some, but not many.

    • Ann Marie Dwyer profile image

      Ann Marie Dwyer 6 years ago from South Carolina, USA

      Truly vulgar. And I was never a fan of ADC, although many of my friends and family were.