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The Call Of The Mountain

Updated on August 27, 2016

Writing Challenge

Thank you, Bill Holland (http://hubpages.com/@billybuc) for getting so many of us old Hubbers back in the fray!

This hub is in response to your Writing Challenge (http://hubpages.com/literature/A-Writing-Challenge-Are-You-Up-For-It) and it's a short story in verse form.


For Gareth, the path seemed much narrower than

He remembered when he had said Goodbye to Jan

He hoisted his knapsack on and set about

Climbing right up to the top of that mount.

With each step, Time rolled back, he went back ten years

When he’d left his home on the mountain with Jan all in tears

He followed the overgrown pathway until

He came to the railroad where the milk cans were filled

Now nothing remained except rotted train tracks

The old bogeys stood motionless, not one intact.

And suddenly, Gareth was filled with new fears

Of What if? And How come? Would he still find her here?

The narrow path up was now o’ergrown with weeds

It looked quite undisturbed for ages by feet

Time was when they ran up and down this pathway

He had to climb faster and find out today

Suddenly everything seemed so very dear

But no sound of welcome could Gareth now hear.


The old barn appeared as he turned round a bend

The silo stood lonely, with no one to mend

Its decrepit state, where, oh where were they all?

Had they all left the mountain as he had, that Fall?

The silence was deafening, only the wind in his ears

Where once there was laughter, now nothing to hear.

He walked round the cottage and on the slope of the hill

He saw them, those three gravestones standing so still

He’d come back for his love as he’d promised he would

Of that grand passion, was this all that stood?

He’d waited too long, and he saw her face dear

Swim before his eyes now as he fought back his tears.


Was the mountain to blame, was it jealous of him?

Did it take back its own and leave him to swim

In his misery, meting out punishment swift

For thinking a mountain girl he could just shift?

He stood there unmoving, like those gravestones near

Her parents and she gone, leaving him alone here.

You'll find more short stories here:

http://hubpages.com/literature/Daddys-Mountain

http://hubpages.com/literature/The-Ghost-Mountain-Adventure-a-short-story

http://hubpages.com/literature/Rainbow-Mountain

http://hubpages.com/literature/The-Come-Back-to-Hubpages-Challenge

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    • vocalcoach profile image

      Audrey Hunt 9 months ago from Nashville Tn.

      You've done a fine job with Bill's challenge Shalini. I enjoyed following Gareth's path up the mountain.

      Congratulations!

      Audrey

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Thanks so much, Audrey!

    • De Greek profile image

      De Greek 9 months ago from UK

      I felt a tear running down my cheek. Just one, but we manly men tend to guard against such weaknesses. What are you trying to do, Shal? Beat me to the winning post? ;-)

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Haha DG - no chance - you've left me way behind! :D

    • Feline Prophet profile image

      Feline Prophet 9 months ago from India

      Glad to see you back in action, Shal! Such evocative words...even without the pictures, we'd have been able to picture it all!

    • VioletSun profile image

      VioletSun 9 months ago from Oregon/ Name: Marie

      This was pleasurable to read and was wondering if Gareth would find his love. I felt a little sadness that his search didn't have a happy ending. Such is the power of a good story. :)

    • quicksand profile image

      quicksand 9 months ago

      Hi Shal,

      What a pleasant surprise this is! You were missed by all your fans.

      I am at a loss for words ...

      Cheers and best wishes!

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Thanks FP, Marie and quicksand - sorry for the delay but I just couldn't post any comments from my phone!

      Quicksand, my dear friend - I've missed this place too - thanks to Bill, I'm back and hope to stay :)Great to see you around!

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 9 months ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Happy to meet you through Nellieanna's link...

      This is a powerful piece in a few words... beautiful submission to Bill's challenge.

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Thank you so much for coming by and reading and commenting, marcoujor!

    • Venkatachari M profile image

      Venkatachari M 9 months ago from Hyderabad, India

      Nice to find you, Shalini, through Nellieanna. This is a wonderful response to Bill Holland's challenge.

    • bravewarrior profile image

      Shauna L Bowling 9 months ago from Central Florida

      Very powerful verse, Shalini. Outstanding response to Bill's challenge!

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Thank you, Venkatachari and bravewarrior- loved participating in the challenge! Such a nice gesture on Bill's part to try and get some of us old Hubbers back!

    • manatita44 profile image

      manatita44 9 months ago from london

      A loving story and a dedicated approach from Gareth. The plot starts and unfolds nicely. A wonderful and narrative poetic effort.

    • Shalini Kagal profile image
      Author

      Shalini Kagal 9 months ago from India

      Thank you for coming by and reading, manatita44!

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