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The Downside of Hair.
The Downside Of Hair
As one gets older hair vanishes from the head as if in retreat from the endless battles Hair-itorial rights as each and every strand makes a final stand and takes a somewhat rapid exit from the scalp only to reappear in large abundance in one's nose and ears. I, being an old hippie have discovered that: The longer one keeps their hair the longer they get to keep it I will mostr likely be buried with a large head of hair. Most folks at seventy are not feeling all that plucky anyway so they begin to resemble a balding, unnourished Chia Pet. But Eyebrows get incredibly bushy like two dead squirrels running across a forehead. Moles suddenly sprout single thick hairs like antennae, on each wizened alien of youth. All this Hairless flesh settles not so neatly into a wheelchair as time folds flesh into accordion wrinkles playing a dirge for youth lost. They say after death hair grows on when in actuality it is just the body shrinking. One can just imagine all those tufts of hair still extended from twin nasal holes and ear cavities on a skull, plus the huge caterpillars that mark where the no longer worried brow once was. Beards and mustaches hang on as long as flesh prevails before decomposing Van Dykes and ZZ Top style lengths turn into what must resemble what one would find on a barber's floor fallen between the ribs of the deceased. I will not discuss the nether regions of body hair after death that would be impolite of me for sure. Bobby pins and ribbons toupees and weaves will all tumble from their finely groomed places. Wigs most likely will remain fixed where they were left. hair plugs will be unplugged forever when life is drained All that is our crowning glory sadly abdicates the thrones of our skulls eventually. Most of us come into the world as bald as a cue ball but many more are blessed with a full head of hair perhaps it is Hair-editary but after the age of sixty or so most hair tarries not. We can hide hair loss with any number of hats that we can afford because we no longer need our hair cut. it is just a fact of life and a samll financial blessing We save money on conditioners, shampoos, brushes, combs and curlers. Although we have to buy nose and ear trimmers to prune our orifices. There are so many facts about hair loss that would outnumber the hairs on one's head but I choose to snip this rather morbid but humoress article from my way overthinking head. Vanity does not follow us past our departures we all become exactly the same no matter how attractive or homely we were in life. Perhaps there is a lesson to be learned from that I was always hairy and boney but someday I will only be boney. Hair today, Bald tomorrow anmd forever more.
© 2009 Matthew Frederick Blowers III