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The Fallen Poet (too scared to write)

Updated on August 30, 2009
THe poet or the dark ...WHO WILL PREVAIL?
THe poet or the dark ...WHO WILL PREVAIL?

The last couple of days have been nasty and painful.And when you try to write off all the pain and harm that you feel cooking inside of your soul and fail you feel devastated and broken. feeling Let down is what makes things worse. You try to let go but the memories keep replaying themselves over and over again. And when you try to make peace and find that even YOUR PEN betrayed you, YOUR WORLD Shatters. Feeling lost broken and betrayed leaves you with nothing. So HELP ME GOD!


The Fallen Poet (too scared to write)

The pen lies broken on the crimson floor

Palms sweaty red slippery and swore

The scars run deep but the words can’t explain

Can’t comprehend the terror can’t tell about the pain

It hurts when what you feel on paper you can’t pour

And it burns like acid through the ashes deep it digs down more

Bleakness and Emptiness

Hopelessness and madness

Describe the little white empty sheet of damnation and terror

No words no reflection as the pen stares at itself in the mirror

The writer with the mighty pen has turned vulnerable and weak

Silenced by the excruciating pain, hungry to cry yet unable to speak

The Shattering muteness

Drives the poet to madness

The memories taste of bitterness burn like lava of heat

As the master of the pen mutely stumbles off her feet

And the sheet under her palms virginally lays blank in the snow

She, into the river of expression is inevitably unable to row

And the serpents of her past uncoil and call upon her demon

Nails dig down her scalp as she drowns in the past’s venom

She once trusted that her pen will never fail her

Yet once again she was wrong, oh life never is fair

Has her heart gone cold out of shock?

Or has it run out of time and turned to rock?

The master’s memories are there right where they were

But her heart can’t put them into words, unexpressed, so unfair

Has the pen surrendered its final verses?

To the dark and claimed death its mistress?

Or has the last line of her heart run dry from the master’s blood

And decided to watch her body arch in pain and her blood flood?

Six hundred sixty six days the poet master held her head up high

Though she knew that the scarce hope she hang to was a lie

Carried by the wind like a powerless feather

The master has become the slave don’t bother

Life turned hate and evil to be her middle name

And the numbness for her soul has came to claim

The only words she had, have lost their lust and tastes

As life sours everything the poet’s little hope fades

When being the poet you are gets you damned and called a whore

Sulk like the old master into the bleakness call life just no more

Remember my face and how it felt to be broken

Remember the silence of my pen and being the fallen

The bruised fingers shake in agony and silence. Or is it fear?

As the broken poet too scared to write sheds her last tear

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    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 5 years ago from Lebanon

      Hey Ama, before i started writing the poem, i something really bad happened that day and it remained to torture me for an entire week. It took me one whole week to understand how i felt and try make peace with what i felt, and as a result of all that "thinking" the poem surfaced to be a reflection of all the pain you feel yet can't comprehend. It mostly isn't about the writer's block, it is about when you depend on something to help you express that pain that you can't talk to others about and that only thing for the first time fails you and you are left with the pain that you can't comprehend. I don't know if trying to explain this makes understanding the intro any better, yet no matter what i am glad you liked the poem ":D:D I am really appreciative to your positive feedback it makes the memories of that exact incident a little better. I think with poetry i found solitude!

    • AmaTainted profile image

      Amanda 5 years ago from Texas

      voted "up" and gave kudos...

      i feel the intro is separate and apart from the poem, basically saying, "i didnt get the connection".

      1) sorry to hear of your pain and im glad it all worked out for you. your moments of anguish produced a very well written poem.

      2) i truly enjoyed the poem. i missed the part about heartache as i read it to be a "writers block" moment. those who write day after day feel a certain "pain" when the words just stop and it does do something to the mind... the second guessing alone can make a body ill.

      i am still in awe!

      thank you for sharing the inner you.

      Ama

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 6 years ago from Lebanon

      ralwus I haven't heard from you in a looooooooong while :D how have you been?

    • profile image

      ralwus 6 years ago

      Gee, how did I miss this gem? Glad you worked it all out. x

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      lEt us make a club :(

    • blaise25 profile image

      Fehl Dungo 7 years ago from close to you...

      I hate it, too. Fear ruins me..

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      Thanks for the support i hate it when that happens:)

    • blaise25 profile image

      Fehl Dungo 7 years ago from close to you...

      Very strong verses there my friend. Yah, it happens sometimes that fear betrays a poet's pen..This one was excellent :)

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      Cris, probably yes. Thank you for your comments and i do appreciate your support !

      jess yes poetry is a bridge between earth and heaven, this is something i have come to believe in. thank you for your support

      Kisszl, thanks

    • Jess Killmenow profile image

      Jess Killmenow 7 years ago from Nowheresville, Eastern United States

      One of poetry's reasons for existence is that words are inadequate. Poetry makes words do more, work harder, take on new meaning - just as you have done here. Bravo.

    • Cris A profile image

      Cris A 7 years ago from Manila, Philippines

      but there's one gift that remains with you... self-awareness. others do not even know what's going on. that said, another raw and powerful piece of writing my friend :D

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      Visionary Poet , yes when in pain a person can only hope to write to relieve himself of the misery. Sometimes our truest poems and feelings are expressed when were are too scared to comprehend the situation. Life has lots for us to get inspired from yet when experiencing the pain itself it is more true and touching.

      manlypoetryman , it took me years to tackle the true person that lies inside. Hidden in a corner i always felt missing a part. Not until i discovered and uncovered the true soul mate /poet in me that i felt whole again. Poetry is medicine!

      jayb23, you are really a very supportive friend. And i hope you don't get bored with these lines. Thank you!

      Shalini Kagal, losing some part of you is always scaring and painful. Yes not until she returns back that i will feel whole. It is pain for me until that day comes.

      Am I dead, yet? , thank you so much. You are always generous with your comments.

      free4india, i couldn't have said any better. :D I hope you enjoyed your stop over:D

      tantrum , Pain..yeh it is really a pain :D but it gets the best out of me "D

      Thanks all for your support and comments:d

    • tantrum profile image

      tantrum 7 years ago from Tropic of Capricorn

      Loved this poem!! So much pain and so much wit !!

    • free4india profile image

      free4india 7 years ago

      Pain sometimes brings out the best in people....... you have proved it ....

    • profile image

      Am I dead, yet? 7 years ago

      Uriel,

      This is phenomenal work! Brilliantly expressed, such a privilege to read. Fan-freakin-tastic!

    • Shalini Kagal profile image

      Shalini Kagal 7 years ago from India

      Incredibly powerful the way you describe your powerlessness. The desertion of one's Muse is always so painful - and you never feel whole again till she returns. It isn't everyone though who can express the agony as powerfully as you've done. Thanks for sharing!

    • jayb23 profile image

      jayb23 7 years ago from India

      You really have a talent for poems. The pain and suffering has been so well expressed. Keep up the good work

    • manlypoetryman profile image

      manlypoetryman 7 years ago from (Texas !) Boldly Writing Poems Where No Man Has Gone Before...

      Such great lines...you have a flair for writing poetry...Well done!

    • Visionary Poet profile image

      Visionary Poet 7 years ago from northwest florida

      I can feel every line, it is only through our pain and suffering that we can truly express and create art. Without it we would have little to write.

    • Uriel profile image
      Author

      Uriel 7 years ago from Lebanon

      Brenda no trust me it took me a whole week to really understand really how i feel. I couldn't write or even understand what was going on. SO yeah it is a major problem since my whole world revolves around writing and spilling it out.

      Jodi thanks for stopping by and for commenting. Always an honor to write on hubpages:D

    • Jodi Hoeksel profile image

      Jodi Hoeksel 7 years ago

      this is deep.

    • profile image

      \Brenda Scully 7 years ago

      brilliant poetry there, no problems with writing as far as i can see well done