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The Fart Spotters Guide
As my Mum was having a bit of a tidy up and a clear out the other day, she came across a small green card with this "Fart Spotter's Guide" printed on it. She must have had it buried in her paperwork for years. Finding it somewhat amusing I borrowed the card so that I could share this list with all of you.
Which category do you fall into???
The Fart Spotter's Guide
1) Shy Person.
One who releases silent farts then blushes.
2) Impudent Person.
One who farts loud and then laughs.
3) Nervous Person.
One who stops in the middle of a fart.
4) Honest Person.
One who admits he's farted but offers good medical reasons.
5) Dishonest Person.
One who farts and blames his dog.
6) Foolish Person.
One who suppresses a fart for hours.
7) Thrifty Person.
One who always has farts in reserve.
8) Anti-social Person.
One who excuses himself and farts in private.
9) Strategic Person.
One who conceals his farts by loud laughing.
10) Athletic Person.
One who farts at the slightest exertion.
11) Intellectual Person.
One who can determine the smell of his neighbour's farts.
12) Sadistic Person.
One who farts and then fluffs the covers over his bed mate.
13) Sensitive Person.
One who farts and then starts crying.
14) Aquatic Person.
One who farts in the bath and bursts the bubbles with his toes.
15) Musical Person.
One who farts in ascending fourths and hears in perfect pitch.