The Paranoia of Poverty: A Rant
Fear Mongering: Just One of my Many Hobbies
Fear is creeping into and slowly but surely infiltrating the hearts, minds, and very souls of ordinary Americans. The sheer terror of the random collection call from a creditor, the frightening spectre of even the possibility of losing their homes, not too mention their cars and all of the stuff they have so insidiously and arduously accumulated over the years.
This is the worst part of the recession in my humble opinion. Why do people say humble opinion? If they were really humble they wouldn't offer an opinion, would they?
What about fear of losing one's life savings? Well, I would not go as far as that because an overwhelming portion of the general population OF THE ENTIRE WORLD does not have two dimes to rub together, much less personal savings.
Our parents had it pretty good now that we look back on it. The 50s and 60s were such innocent years. Ahhhhh.
Enter 2009: We, all of us, every single good goddammed one of us idiots is getting raped repeatedly with hot pokers. Figuratively speaking, of course, since actual rape, at least if it happened to me, would be preferable to losing all of one's money, property, and, in the case of JOB LOSS, even the ability to repay debt, were we so inclined to do so. That's right, the banks have screwed us over so badly that we can't pay them back now even if we wanted to, which, of course, we don't.
Word of advice, people: Banks are not your buddies.
Stunned silence. Shock. Scratch myself.
Back to reality: nowadays we are locked in our homes, afraid to go outside lest we get pulled over by the cops for expired registration tabs. We don't have much money for gas anyway so why bother? Better to sit home and watch Netflix, smoke a roach, and veg out completely than face the cruel world beyond the threshold.
Actually, I have found that smoking weed can actually make you more paranoid, not to mention delusional. Just how delusional one actually gets depends on which dispensary one goes to in the city. If you've never been to a Medical Marijuana Dispensary you owe it to yourself. I am, of course, just talking to the Liberals such as myself out there. I can only assume that all self-respecting-loathing Republicants have already tuned out of this rant.
Because that is what it is: A RANT. Pretty good one too, huh? Hey, this is fun, just writing anything that comes to mind. Like a live, improv comedy act.
But wait, I am losing the dire tone in my diatribe. The word diatribe is funny, huh? Like a tribe that all gets diarrhea at the same time.
I digress. Or I digest.
Fear. Black, trembling, out-of-your skull paralyzing shit in your pants FEAR with a capital F as in I am so totally FUCKED Fear. That kind of Fear. The kind that makes you think that if you saw it coming down the sidewalk you night think to yourself, hey, it might be wise right around now to cross the fucking street.
Because that's one statistic they don't show you. A lot of people (not all) that get mugged are complete imbeciles. And what I mean by that is that they have very low I.Q.s. Low common sense. You don't need to be some sort of I.Q. doctor (?) to know that if you park your piece-of-shit-car on some side street in a sketchy neighborhood that you may be in for a rude awakening of sorts. A re-arranging of your parts if you will.
That's all the time I have for now. More rants to come soon.