The Passing...a poem
By Tony DeLorger © 2013
Mounded earth through blurred eyes,
unwilling to acknowledge the loss,
torrid emotions, unleashed,
unable to focus on the reality ensuing.
Profound, defining and heartbreaking,
her eyes filled with sadness, a memory burnt,
knowing the end was near,
and her concern was for me.
She said little, ignoring the last goodbye,
out of fear, out of kindness,
perhaps to just hold on to what was left,
and I, barely able to speak, didn't help.
As she fell to darkness and her body clung to life,
I stood there helpless, inept,
and she, having waited for my arrival,
knew my steps as they approached.
Face gaunt, pale and lifeless,
her breathing slow, and in desperate rhythm,
seemingly gone, but grasping that last moment.
I held her hand and tenderly squeezed,
her warmth radiating, her presence undeniable,
and I knew she'd been waiting for me,
to make sure I was alright.
I leaned forward, my lips closed to her ear,
and whispered “you can let go now Mum, I'm here,
and I'll be fine.”
I peered down at her neck, sinewy and so narrow,
and her pulse slow and regular, just stopped,
and I felt her settle,
as if her soul finally found release
and this shell, this body just dropped to the bed, all done.
She was gone.
As the casket lowered into the loving arms of the earth,
her soul no doubt looking down on her only son,
the pain just swept me away,
into a vast and stark desert within myself.
I was alone, truly alone for the first time,
and my soul ached,
for all she had given me,
for what she had sacrificed
and how she had endowed me with love.
Kindness surrounded me, loving arms to comfort,
but there was no comfort,
just complete and utter sorrow.
The sun would rise again, with or without me,
and my pain was as much my loss as my mother's passing,
but I would survive, as I was taught by her,
to experience yet another day, in this cycle of life.
Sorrow is a profound emotional experience, especially when we lose our parents. But life goes on in perpetual cycles of Life and Death, and we are simply part of it.