...The Power of the Muse...
I began reading the author Julia Cameron over ten years ago and was introduced to her magical methods of unleashing the creative potential within by writing three long hand morning pages a day. One of the secrets to doing this was to not re-read them right away. One of my issues is that I didn't want to re-read them ever. They were full of whining and moaning and disgust at my bad habits.
Today I wake up after about five hours of sleep. My little boy had a nap yesterday that in turn extended his time to be awake until 1 am. My oldest and second oldest sons have to be up at 6:15 am the latest and if I don't make sure that happens, and they miss the bus - that means I have to get the baby up early and then the day is definitely longer. So I made sure I was up to get them out the door.
It is still dark out at 6:15 am when I go to get my two sheets of loose leaf paper. Today I felt like stamping an image of a bee with a trail of pollen on each of them in black ink. Sometimes I use stickers and sometimes I just write. Today I wanted to jump start my creativity and productivity with an image that is associated with those qualities. Had I wanted transformation, I would use the butterfly. Since today is the "New Moon" I felt like starting again, and perfect pun intended, in the Dark of the Moon...when the "New Moon" is noted, it is when the moon is completely dark and seeds thoughts of the mind are planted and tended until they either take or don't. By the Full Moon, two weeks from now, we shall see what has sprouted.
I have been trying to get the three/four pages done in an hour at the least. I make the mistake of updating my Facebook, checking email, sometimes I get up and starting painting as I am waiting and reminding and hounding the boys out the door. I tell myself that I have to do the dishes that are mountainous in the sink or get a head start on the laundry. Then I stop what I am doing and remind myself how annoyed I will be if I don't finish my Morning Pages. They are not Afternoon Pages or while I wait in line at a drive through pages...15 minutes each side, times four sides = one hour. If I have an appointment or the bus gets missed, then I will need to break it up into 15 minutes here and 15 minutes there - its manageable but not preferred.
The muse seems to get pissed off when I do this. She is trying to relay a steady stream of information to me and I walk away to look at something on the internet and get pulled into the almighty vortex of time suckage and then I scribble a few thoughts here and there. Alot of whining then gets recorded and I want to light everything on fire. But that was not the case this morning, even though I had only slept like four and an half hours. I told my "Inner Bitch" to shut the f up so I could listen to the divine voice of Her, the Muse.
She is powerful enough to persuade me to leave my phone on the charger on the other side of the house. She asks me to sit on the corner of the bed with the netbook shut on standby (for this hub of course to be born it must be) and take my favorite black Uni*ball vision micro pen and start writing. ON PAPER. WITH A PEN. IT WORKS. IT WORKED TODAY, and it has worked many days in the past. I take that first quote I find that I chose, after asking for Her assistance and inspiration, and I expand my mind as far as I can. I tear down the cobwebs of sleep and tell myself that I can create a much clearer blueprint if I can do this before the chaos of a full life begins. Only then can I truly focus on getting it done, getting it down and not letting myself down.
...Beginning, Middle, End...
Now I have done it. I have ingested my quote - written four long hand pages - and read about the art and craft of storytelling. I have a mental list of things to be done today, but if I don't integrate that morning writing in properly, I have the "Inner Bitch" following me around all day tell me that I suck and my discipline is disappointing. So in order to tell her to go back to the dungeon where she belongs, I am conquer her by completing them, and go on to the creation of the some of the things that I have written in those early morning drainings of my bursting thoughts.
I have brainstormed a better way for fitting this kind of thing into my life. My little boy sleeps on the bed beside me this whole time. I know when he wakes up my whole train of thought for this is derailed and picks up speed in a whole different way. I wouldn't change it for anything. I've got issues to deal with, things to do, lists and organizing and of course, my story waits for me as She taps Her foot just a little lighter now that I have scratched the surface of this day. She has torn my story into pieces because it won't be strong enough the way it was. She says...find another quote to finish this sharing of your words this morning, and get on with the day. So I open once more, randomly:
"Writing is something you do alone in a room. ... The only thing you really need ... is the talent of the room. Unless you have that, your other talents are worthless." ~ Michael Ventura
Ummm...okay. I understand this because I need a certain room to write a certain way. And I am grateful to know this.
Have a wonderful day my friends!
See you soon :)