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The Softness of a Woman

Updated on November 26, 2014

If You Want ...

If you want the softness of a woman
You must often hear her cry.
If you want the loving of a woman
You will sometimes want to die.
If you wish to hold her in your arms
You may have to hear her shout
If you want her close beside you
You will have to work it out.

Work it out. Work it out. Shout it out. Talk it out.

Doesn't matter how you do it
But just don't shut her out.
She will sometimes drive you crazy
And you'll wonder why you're there.

But if you want the softness of a woman
You must also hear her cry.


Listen To This Woman

If you want the mother of your children
To also be your wife
If the lass who serves you supper
Is the most important in your life ...
If the woman who lies beside you
Is to be your lady-love

Then listen to this woman
Don't let her slip away.
Caress her with your friendship
Seduce her with your play.

If you want the softness of a woman
You will have to hear her cry.
If you want the loving of a woman
You will sometimes want to die.


The Poem

This poem is written as a song, almost a lullaby, and it is full of repetition and simple words. The simple words are designed to reach the emotions instead of the mind and to communicate a powerful message.

The Message

Loving a woman is not easy. It takes patience and understanding. For many men, it will move them far beyond their comfort zone as they are forced to deal with her emotions, her moods and sometimes her hormones. But if a man wants a woman in his life, in any meaningful way, he will endure this difficulty in order to hold unto someone that he loves.

Some men are not willing to do this but they are not willing to live without women, altogether. Some men even take to abusing women who inconvenience them or do things to annoy them, all the time still wanting her close enough to feel her softness. But if a man truly desire the "softness of a woman," he must hear her tears and dry her face. He cannot have her there, as a doll, for his use, but not being willing to love her.

Love is more than getting what you need, but it's giving what is needed. This is often inconvenient and rarely without a price but love will be willing to pay the cost.


I wrote this poem about twelve years ago, to someone I knew who was abusing his wife. I tried to share it with him but he did not get the message. I saw so clearly how he was not willing to love this woman who had given him children and devoted her life to serving him.

All she wanted was his love but he was unwilling to give her even that. He kept yelling at her and shaming her, and not listening to her. No matter how much I pleaded with him to stop, he would not. She tried to leave him many times but could not stay away. Eventually, she died of cancer, which I believe was from the stress of what she was going through. This poem comes from a sad place but it is also a happy poem because when a man loves a woman, it is truly a beautiful thing.


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