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Witnesses

Updated on August 08, 2012


It was at a candy store,

and it was suppose to be

an in and out,

but it was not,

the afternoon was hot,

and the child was taken

from an isolated parking lot,

in that, there was no mistaken,

she was a mother of five,

who just took the youngest

for a ride,

and it happened just

as she went inside,

witnesses say that the man

was about five feet five,

and wore a cowboy hat,

others say he was shorter then that,

and it was a baseball cap,

nothing more frustrating

than to listen to the witnesses

take too long,

and get it all wrong,

some say the parking lot was dim,

the man was fat,

while others say he was thin,

some say he had a weird stare,

an odd glare,

dirty brown hair,

with a slight twirl,

others say it was very greasy with a little curl,

it seems as if all the witnesses...

were at the scene,

some say the car he drove

was black, red and others say green,

some say it had a ski rack,

and definitely not black,

some were so sure,

that he drove a two door,

others say four,

witnesses seem to offer

more and more,

but the detectives get

less and less,

when witnesses collide,

you get such a mess.

© 2012 Frank Atanacio

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    • josh3418 profile image

      Joshua Zerbini 4 years ago from Pennsylvania

      Frank,

      Awesome job here Frank! I absolutely loved it Frank! Clever! Thanks.

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 4 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      Your witnesses have brought 'see no evil', to a whole new level.

    • profile image

      Valleypoet 4 years ago

      As a youngster I was the victim of a mugging...I was asked to pick out the mugger from some mugshots...I had no idea!!...a face is tricky, remembering what someone was wearing is easier. My point is that it's harder than you think...but I think the commenter above has it in the bag...good read Frank:-)

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thanks josh, MCKbirds and the Valley Poet for witnessing this poem :) LOL bless you all Frank

    • xstatic profile image

      Jim Higgins 4 years ago from Eugene, Oregon

      Isn't it amazing how eyewitnesses can see the same thing happen and yer be so unreliable. This is a great one Frank!

    • Matthew Weese profile image

      Matthew Weese 4 years ago from Auburn

      A lot of people have been convicted wrongly due to eye witness accounts.

    • writer20 profile image

      Joyce Haragsim 4 years ago from Southern Nevada

      Great poem. One of the police here in Las Vegas said witnesses never remember correctly.

      Voted up and awesome

    • TToombs08 profile image

      Terrye Toombs 4 years ago from Somewhere between Heaven and Hell without a road map.

      Boy, Frank, ain't that the truth! The more witnesses you have, the most stories you get! And not a darn one of them will be the same! :) You painted a very bleak scenario that happens far too often. Good job, though, my friend. Always disturbing to read but so well done. :)

    • Rosemay50 profile image

      Rosemary Sadler 4 years ago from Hawkes Bay - NewZealand

      I guess our powers of observation are lacking somewhat, maybe if we were asked right there that moment we could do pretty well but hours later our minds soon get confused.

      Awesome piece and spot on

    • Sinea Pies profile image

      Sinea Pies 4 years ago from Northeastern United States

      Ever played the rumor game? Get a line of people. First one whispers a sentence in the ear of the next...and the next does the same...and on and on till at the end the sentence is nothing like they started with? Similar deal to "eye witnesses". They only have shadows of the real story.

      Such a creative hub. LOVED it! Voted up and awesome.

    • Hyphenbird profile image

      Brenda Barnes 4 years ago from America-Broken But Still Beautiful

      In the moment of drama and excitement I suppose it is easy to focus on other things than the appearance of physical details. However I was robbed at gunpoint twice and can still recall every detail of those faces even 20 years later. Isn't that odd? Thanks for a great read Frank. Of course you never fail to give us one.

    • Jackie Lynnley profile image

      Jackie Lynnley 4 years ago from The Beautiful South

      It's like passing a secret down a line I think, what will it be at the end. Great write, voting up and sharing.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Thank you so much the X-Man and Mathew for visiting my Witness... and thank you too Joyce aka the writer20 and TTombs my favorite entertainer LOL thanks for being my witnesses :) Frank

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Rosemay and Pies thank you for sharing your thoughts and Hyphen to have a memory like that is an assest bless you and sorry to hear about you being held up at gun point :( and Jackie always good to see you on my page bless you all

    • ShubeyThePoet profile image

      ShubeyThePoet 4 years ago from Williamsville,NY

      Nice imagery Frank!! Great poem!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thanks for stopping by shub :)

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 4 years ago from California

      I am with mcbirdbks! Your witnesses have have subcribed to the "see no evil" theory! Great write Frank!

    • BlossomSB profile image

      Bronwen Scott-Branagan 4 years ago from Victoria, Australia

      As a teenager I read Kipling's 'Kim' over and over. There was so much in it that could teach us how to observe correctly what we see. I think about it, but I still don't do it very well. A great poem on a crucial theme.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Audrey aren't you on Holiday? LOL thanks for the comment and bless you too Blossom for visiting my witnesses :)

    • AudreyHowitt profile image

      Audrey Howitt 4 years ago from California

      Hey Frank I got back yesterday and I read your work first my friend!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      welcome back and God Bless You :)

    • Patty Kenyon profile image

      Patty Kenyon 4 years ago from Ledyard, Connecticut

      Frank, I never received the notification of this one!! :(

      AWESOME JOB!!!! I loved the imagery throughout and this felt like it was literally ripped from the headlines!!! Voted Up, Awesome, Interesting, and Shared!!! :)

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Patty thanks for stopping by.. you're the best and Im not saying that because you're from Connecticut.. or am I? LOL thanks for the comment

    • Patty Kenyon profile image

      Patty Kenyon 4 years ago from Ledyard, Connecticut

      ROFL...I love your humor!!!

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      God Bless you Patty :)

    • marcoujor profile image

      Maria Jordan 4 years ago from Jeffersonville PA

      Smooth style with a "who dunno it" persuasion.

      So kewl... Voted UP and UAI. Thanks, Maria

    • thelyricwriter profile image

      Richard Ricky Hale 4 years ago from West Virginia

      Up, awesome, and interesting Frank! Another classic to the many bro!

    • Vinaya Ghimire profile image

      Vinaya Ghimire 4 years ago from Nepal

      Frank, your style to dramatize events is truly amazing.

    • Gypsy Rose Lee profile image

      Gypsy Rose Lee 4 years ago from Riga, Latvia

      As always with more witnesses and more facts the end result if usually one big mess. Clever poem.

    • LaThing profile image

      LaThing 4 years ago from From a World Within, USA

      Wow, frustrating senerio!! You drew a perfect picture with your words, I could just see those witnesses, all very sure of themselves!

      Awesome, and voting up....

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Thanks so much Marcour for stopping by and sharing your comment and always thelytricwriter thanks for your support and VG thank you too bless you guys :)

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thank you so much Gypsy and Lathing glad you guys could visit my witnesses :)

    • Alastar Packer profile image

      Alastar Packer 4 years ago from North Carolina

      Eyewitnesses are notoriously inaccurate in situations like this--where something happens fast. Our minds don't do so good at whats peripheral to our attention it seems. Which is extra unfortunate with a child-napping. Awesome wordplay and imagery Frank.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Alastar you said it all.. thanks for also noticing the kid-napping..bless you bro :) Frank

    • sweetie1 profile image

      sweetie1 4 years ago from India

      Frank very nice poem and ofcourse everyone tries to pinch in even if they hadnt seen the criminal properly. This not only confuse the investigation authorities but also weakens the case in court

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thank you sweetie1 for reading my witnesses :) Frank

    • Deborah Brooks profile image

      Deborah Brooks Langford 4 years ago from Brownsville,TX

      You never get the right story and so many stories from so many wittnesses .. great poem as usual my friend..

      debbie

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Thank you our Ms Brooks for your footprints all over my pages today bless you...

    • Nyamache profile image

      Joshua Nyamache 4 years ago from Kenya

      Great poem and this is what actually happens when witnesses say what they saw making their information to be unreliable.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thanks for reading Nyamacha :)

    • phdast7 profile image

      Theresa Ast 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      Frank - A wonderful poem and addressing such a serious issue. Over the past five years or so I have read more and more about how unreliable witness testimony really is and how easily influenced we all are, even the best observers among us. Makes the focus on DNA evidence all the more important. A great piece. Theresa

    • Storytellersrus profile image

      Barbara 4 years ago from Stepping past clutter

      Sad commentary!!! Reminds me of the way we all listen- we hear what we wish, I suppose, colored by our visions. Good one.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      Thank so much Phdast and storyteller for visiting and commenting on my witness..:) bless you both

    • phdast7 profile image

      Theresa Ast 4 years ago from Atlanta, Georgia

      Came back to read this again. This really is a very serious issue. In a couple of articles they mentioned that now even if there is agreement that DNA evidence is infinitely superior to fingerprint...

      Most states do not have large enough labs, sufficient ;ab personnel and crime labs are underfunded and perpetually far behind. What a travesty. Thanks again for a compelling hub.

    • Frank Atanacio profile image
      Author

      Frank Atanacio 4 years ago from Shelton

      thanks for coming back and adding bless you Phdast7

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