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Then and Still

Updated on November 12, 2011
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Then and Still

I loved you, then,
and I love you still
but it did not work out
and it never will.
I gave my all
and you used me up
and left me broken,
just an empty cup.
You stole my heart
but never gave it back.
How the years have flown,
yet, I still feel the lack.
I see your face
when I close my eyes
and I feel the loss
of my compromise...
and alone, I sit, as
memories taunt and tease,
and tear drops fall
in the gentle breeze.
All I needed was
the right to be...
but you needed more,
with nothing left for me.
Its been eight long years
but I still feel the pain...
My heart is hollow and
collecting rain.
I loved you, then,
and I love you still,
but it's not by choice,
yes, it's against my will.
Return my heart that
I may close this door,
reclaim what's mine and
embrace love once more.


"Copyright 2011, All Rights Reserved."



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    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 4 years ago

      Enigmatic Me, thank you. "Keep the good, forget and dispose of the rest"...words of wisdom, indeed. I appreciate your read and thoughtful feedback!

    • Enigmatic Me profile image

      4 years ago from East Coast Canada

      The "freedom to be me" in a relationship is often compromised by "the will to live as 'us'" . Unfortunately, the compromise is the process in which we lose ourselves slowly to the us, and sometimes that process isn't reciprocal.

      The idea of someone controlling our ability to love others is long etched in the history of sad songs and poems alike, however, if we truly think about it, we keep them in our hearts for the 'what if' factor, or 'what was' and need to look into the 'what will be'.... the old adage "If it is meant to be it's up to me" comes to mind. Keep the good forget and dispose of the rest. Its for the best.

      Thanks for sharing, will read more soon.

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Vellur, thank you. Tis is one of my own personal favorites and perhaps the most authentic, as far as my heart goes....

    • Vellur profile image

      Nithya Venkat 5 years ago from Dubai

      Beautifully expressed - wonderful poem though very sad. The way you have written is brilliant. Voted up.

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      BeyondMax, thank you for your most awesome comment. This is a very personal and true write, part of the healing and letting go process. The deeper one loves the deeper the pain, and my heart, it would seem has a mind of it's own! I have never had much choice in who it chooses to love...nor how much!

    • BeyondMax profile image

      BeyondMax 5 years ago from Sydney, Australia

      Oh, Marsha, I'm just so lucky to find your other side! It's a beauty, such a power. Very intense. Our hearts are such vulnerable creatures and they need a tender care. Love is beautiful but how painful it is to let it go when there is no other choice...

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Just like second helpings are a joy to the cook, re-reads are a joy to this poet! You honor me, Poetic Fool, and I can say the same of you!

    • profile image

      Poetic Fool 5 years ago

      I came back to re-read this one because I love it so much. Such lovely word craft:

      Its been eight long years

      but I still feel the pain...

      My heart is hollow and

      collecting rain.

      What great lines delivered with wonderful rhythm and rhyme. You are such a talented poet and I envy that. Looking forward to reading even more!

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Again, thank you, blaise. We are working on it!

    • blaise25 profile image

      Fehl Dungo 5 years ago from close to you...

      So heartfelt and sad..I hope you're better now.

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Ama Tainted, (really interesting name...) thank you for your read and great comment. This was an effort to heal...gosh I hope it works!!!

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Sharyn, I am so sorry...I wouldn't wish this on anyone, for sure. If it helped, then I am glad. May we both reclaim what is ours and move on!

    • AmaTainted profile image

      Amanda 5 years ago from Texas

      all you need was the "Dear Heartbreaker,..." and "...Best Regards, Heart-Breakee". very lovely note/poem. voted UP and beautiful.

    • Sharyn's Slant profile image

      Sharon Smith 5 years ago from Northeast Ohio USA

      NC,

      This piece hit me to the core. Seriously, if you knew what I've been through the past 8 years (how ironic), you would know how desperately I needed to read this. Awesome and THANK YOU!

      Sharyn

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Thanks, Sunnie, it is long overdue!

    • profile image

      Sunnie Day 5 years ago

      I also pray you reclaim your love so that your heart will be full once more..Beautiful words that are written from the heart.

      Sunnie

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      TTW, thank you, as always! Your support is a huge blessing!

    • tumblintumblweed profile image

      tumblintumblweed 5 years ago

      No_Clue,this is a beautiful,heart-felt poem.I feel your pain, and pray that you reclaim your heart, because love awaits you!

      Have a Blessed day!

      TTW

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Thanks, Nikkij, I appreciate your read and great comment! Made my day!

    • Nikkij504gurl profile image

      Nikkij504gurl 5 years ago from Louisiana

      "I loved you, then,

      and I love you still,

      but it's not by choice,

      yes, it's against my will." Love that part. Great poem. the rhyme is well done and i can relate.

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Gypsy48, thank you so much. Yes it is true. The deeper one loves the deeper the pain...that is the risk. Take care.

    • profile image

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      Poetic Fool, thanks so much. I am hoping that by committing this to verse will help me reclaim my heart and move forward. I so appreciate your vote!

    • Gypsy48 profile image

      Gypsy48 5 years ago

      Well written poem. Love can be so painful at times.

    • profile image

      Poetic Fool 5 years ago

      Absolutely beautiful and heart wrenching. This one resonated so much with me, I felt it could have been written for me. Voted up, awesome and beautiful because it was.

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      saddlerider, your comment brought great tears...thank you. I pray the same for you, my friend.

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      mcbirdbks, thankyou, kindly! You are correct, and I am calling my heart home...this write is part of that process!

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      lostwithinmyself, I am a bit embarrassed...I write under two names and commented to this under the wrong name! LOL...having some trouble keeping track of myself, here...yes, I am lost within myself!

    • saddlerider1 profile image

      saddlerider1 5 years ago

      Such sadness penned here my dear, I know to what an empty heart feels like, I loved at one time, love left me never to return, it took flight with my soul and left an empty vessel. I pray that you find love again and that your heart is returned to you to beat again in full measure. Peace and blessings to you.

    • profile image

      lostwithinmyself 5 years ago

      Your very welcome, look forward to reading more of your work. I can relate to your poems.!! x

    • mckbirdbks profile image

      mckbirdbks 5 years ago from Emerald Wells, Just off the crossroads,Texas

      No_clue, you have to slam that door tight. So easy to say and yet challenging to do. Call your love home. Refill that empty cup.

    • profile image

      lostwithinmyself 5 years ago

      What a sad poem but loved it. Voted up! x

    • No_Clue profile image
      Author

      No_Clue 5 years ago

      tillsonititan, thank you. It does, in fact, reflect my own experience, I must admit...and exorcizing demons is its purpose!

    • tillsontitan profile image

      Mary Craig 5 years ago from New York

      I hope this doesn't reflect an experience of your own! Very nice poem well written. It says a lot in a few short lines. Voted up.