Time for Building Chapter 8
Time for Building Chapter 8
Richard still looked handsome, but he was so reserved. There was no sparkle in his eyes.
As we entered the restaurant, he commented that I "looked great" and seemed taller than he remembered. I told him that he had never seen me in heels and dressed in my business attire.
"I never wear heels on a vacation. Even when we were dancing the night we met, I had on comfortable flat shoes." These words were meant to bring back wonderful memories, but Richard started talking about all the things that had happened to him over the past eleven years.
The most surprising was that State Insurance had fired him.
He had been promoted to the sales manager position, which meant training every new agent for three weeks. The company's philosophy was that if a person did something repeatedly for twenty-one days, it became a habit ....and sales were habitual.
Richard succeeded as the leading manager in Tennessee for eight years, then he had to train a beautiful woman in her thirties. Temptation was too strong for them both. He and his trainee agreed not to talk about their affair to anyone.
One morning his supervisor said,"We've been invited to the home office for an important conference". Richard just knew that he was going to be promoted and receive his own district.
The vice president explained to Richard in a very private and strained conversation, that a certain young woman's mother had contacted human resources to report that her daughter had been raped during training...by Richard Alexander.
Richard could not believe what he was hearing. "The company has no choice but to let you go". the vice-president continued.
As a result of this lie, he was losing his career! The affair was between two "consenting adults". There was no reasoning with the vice president. Richard was told to gather his belongings and not to discuss the circumstances with anyone.
The affair caused a terribly bitter divorce between he and his wife, the mother of his two sons. He lost two homes that he had built and half of his retirement savings; he lost his career. He had to start over.
When he stopped talking, I was led to ask him if he was dating. He replied that he was seeing a lady from North Carolina, who was twelve years younger than he was.
I immediately felt as if I was not hearing the whole truth. Inside myself, I immediately went into "protective" mode. My feelings for Richard were buried in my heart, but I knew that I could not get into any type of relationship with him. I had lived with one man who had to have the attention and sexual approval of random women; I could not live that way again. At this time in my life, I could not trust Richard. Life taught me well: I could not trust any man.
The love of my daughter, the "desire of my heart", was very strong and protective. She was only six and needed me; Richard had already reached out to a younger woman and had shown over the years that he had no real need for me in his life. I decided not to explain my feelings to Richard, but to act, not cold, but indifferent
If Richard had said that he wanted to be with me and for us to pick up where we left off, perhaps I would have considered it, but that did not happen and at this point in our meeting, I just wanted to go home. This was not a time for romance.
He walked me out to my car, then slipped into the passenger's side. He wanted to kiss me. I knew that if I kissed him, all the loving, sensual feelings would come roaring back like a wild fire in a dry pine forest. It would tear me apart.
He was visibly disappointed when I put both of my hands up between us, and literally pushed myself away from him. "No...no...no kiss. I have to go". He got out of my car; I drove away.
As I drove home, I realized that I would always care for Richard, but that I would never be able to live with him, even if I had the choice. Once again I made the decision to stay away and carry the sweet memories of our moments in time within my heart. I prayed for Richard's material success as it was very important to him.
I had read several books on reincarnation and was convinced that Richard and I had traveled through TIME together; perhaps as siblings, but definitely as lovers. Occasionally a deep feeling of loneliness would sweep over me; tears would flow and I longed for him to hold me one more time. I wanted to know how his life was unfolding. I dreamed about him often.
In one dream, I was climbing a ladder up to a hayloft. I had a blond ponytail and was about fourteen. When I reached the top, Richard was there. He turned back a soft blanket and said, "Come here and rest. I'll take care of you". As I snuggled into the warm covers, I knew in my Spirit that he was my older brother.
I wanted to dream some more, but I woke up with tears in my eyes as the scene was so "real."
I was thankful for this connection with Richard, even in the dream state, but I knew that once again my life was all my own, with my greatest responsibility....taking care of my daughter.
The years went by as fast as a Saturn Five rocket. My son Dave and I agreed to build a three thousand square foot duplex on the four acres my mother had given me. I did the planning, the paperwork, and handled the financing. Dave did the actual building with help from some of the guys that worked with him.
I was always saying thank you to my angels and to the Lord for the blessings which flowed our way. We broke ground on Christmas Day when I was fifty-five, Leigh was eleven and Dave was thirty.
It was six months later before the foundation was poured. On the Fourth of July weekend the heavy cement trucks lumbered across the yard and the foundation was completed within ten hours on a sunny summer day. The actual framing went smoothly, and five months later, on December 13, a rainy, cold Saturday morning, Leigh and I moved in. Dave and several buddies moved furniture in a large rental truck. As the fellows brought in the sofa, chairs, beds, chests, and the mountain of boxes, Leigh and I put up a Christmas tree.
It was the first new home I had ever lived in and I was happy.
One year later Dave celebrated Christmas in his fifteen hundred square foot "home" which was a mirror image of mine. We each had new appliances in the kitchen, two bathrooms, three bedrooms, and a thirty by fifteen square foot living/dining area. The amount of space was perfect for Dave, and also for Leigh and me.
During the following year, I won the all expense paid trip to Hawaii to attend the convention of American Insurance Company. I took Dave as my guest as a thank you for all of his hard work and just because he was my son. I appreciated everything he had done for his sister and me.
When I walked out on the balcony of the Hawaiian Village Hotel overlooking the Pacific Ocean, I thought of Richard and that life changing night on the beach, twenty years ago. I decided to get in touch with him one day soon and be friends across the miles, for I knew in my heart...he was my soul-mate.
CONTINUED in CHAPTER 9